All the same, I think there's a lot of power in being able to manage one's emotions even in difficult situations. Now I'm just working out when it's called for versus when to just let loose on someone.
i get annoyed, frustrated easily.
but it goes away very fast too.
there are very few triggers where
i completely lose control and just
explode--everyone must suffer.
and i will not know. when. to. stop.
(well usually when i feel they are
suffering more than i am, then
i be like ok... cool offfff)
it's gotten better with age, as in,
i try to remove myself from the
situation, it's like i can feel it bubbling
up. because i can only get to that point
when it involved the ones i love the most,
and shitting on them is just, so...the satisfaction
is so fleeting. then i just feel bad afterwards.
but in the moment. oh boy.
though most of the time, i like pushing buttons,
and i get riled up, so i can push more buttons.
i have no idea if that makes sense.