[ENFP] ENFP's and flirting

[SillySapienne]

ewwwwwwwwwwww

 

[Biaxident]

it would be nice to sit back and of these days and say "When a guy says no, he really means yes." *wink*

haha

Well...Of course...that's what the *wink* is for. No wink, and the zombie look equals, " I think I would like a nice ham sandwich....".

 

[Biaxident]

ewwwwwwwwwwww

Yeah...You say that now.

 

[nomadic]

And that way you'll end up with all the NTs soooo every cloud has a silver lining !

woo hoO!!!!

let me out now! i need to go outdoors and start flirting RIGHT NOW! haha

 

[TopherRed]

Flirting is SOOO easy, I don't understand why you Ps make it into such a big deal.

 

[nomadic]

Flirting is SOOO easy, I don't understand why you Ps make it into such a big deal.

well SORRRRYYYY!!!

Mr. Super Flirt Pro!

Show us how its done then! But before I believe how PRO you are, I am gonna have to see 3 women post sultry messages on your sig book by midnight! lolz

 

[Charmed Justice]

Flirting is SOOO easy, I don't understand why you Ps make it into such a big deal.

Kinda like sex. Everything is big for those of us with a preference for Pness.

 

[nomadic]

Kinda like sex. Everything is big for those of us with a preference for Pness.

lolz

good one

once u get used to that Pness, nothing can quite fill up the emptiness quite the same eh?

 

[sculpting]

I think playful is the perfect word. That would explain why I didn't understand when people thought I was flirting and I was just being nice. Also, many people just want to believe that if you smile at them you are flirting with them. I smile at everyone.

It would also explain why ENFPs seem to flirt regardless of gender. It can just be a playful thing but people take it as flirting. Don't get me wrong, we can be flirts, too. It's just that the belief that we are always flirting is flawed.

I think I do the playful thing a lot-like a puppy. But it has no sexual vibes at all. I dont even understand how to flirt in a provocative way. I once told an ENTP friend I was a man (in the context of back waxing conversations) and he said "Ah-that would explain a lot" as he had been hitting on me for awhile and I didnt get it. I dont even understand when boys are interested in me. I just dont see it.

You do it like this:

Hi mr.x i am not intrested about you in eny romantic way, i just wanted to hang out with you as a friend.

There is nothing rude about saying it straight, its rude not to say it like that. Sorry to let you know that you cant say that in this situation without hurting his feelings. Saying it straight like this you will hurt him the least and you will be least rude. If you do the magical enfp dissapearing trick you will hurt him more(maybe really really much more), but your just not there to see it. Not to mention how rude it is to dissapear without explaining yourself.

+1 I wish everyone in life was this direct and honest.

 

[INTP]

I dont even understand when boys are interested in me. I just dont see it.

I wonder if this is something that meny enfps are like. I know one who is like this allso..

 

[Amargith]

Starts out that way. After a while you learn to identify the look they give you. That is, if you are in fact paying attention and present in this world. Still doesn't mean you understand what you did to get that look though.

 

[Laurie]

+5 billion

 

[Biaxident]

"Heeeey Babeeee"

 

[TopherRed]

*hits forhead, involuntaraily completes Biax song reference*

"...You know you make me wan-na SHOUT!"
"Hey Baby now!"
"SHOUT!"
"Alright girl!"
"SHOUT!"
"Feels good, donnit?!"
"SHOUT!"
"Haaa-aaa-aaaa-ay"
"Haaa-aaa-aaaa-ay"
"Hey-ya-hey-ya-hey-ya-hey"
"Hey-ya-hey-ya-hey-ya-hey"...

*smacks himself silly*

OK! Now that I've gotten that out of my system, please resume the converesation.

 

[Laurie]

Starts out that way. After a while you learn to identify the look they give you. That is, if you are in fact paying attention and present in this world. Still doesn't mean you understand what you did to get that look though.

I think that is why ENFPs end up flirting over the top.

 

[Amargith]

I think that is why ENFPs end up flirting over the top.

Completely agree. I seem to be flirting already without realizing it, I might as well a) consciously enjoy it then and b) make it clear that I'm not serious when hitting on you.

 

[Charmed Justice]

Completely agree. I seem to be flirting already without realizing it....

Right. I think we can be clueless in this regard. Although, I do eventually become aware when some thinks I'm flirting with them. If I start getting the feeling that they're taking me seriously, I back off. Otherwise, it's a silly game. It's almost like how two NTs might shoot sarcastic or witty remarks between each other in a game of one upmanship.

 

[mr.awesome]

too much flirt makes infp feel sad and betrayed :[

 

[Lauren]

See, this is the where being a flirtatious person can backfire. If you are flirtatious most people assume that's just the way you are and does not reflect on how you feel about them.

I think if a flirtatious person gets extra flirtatious with you that's a sign.

Speaking for myself, I'm more direct. It's preeeeettttttttyy obvious if I'm really interested in someone. I am on it! LOL. Even though I'm not really sure what the definition or understanding of "flirting" other members are using here - basically I will make sure you know I am interested in you by taking it past flirting. Flirting is innuendo and joking and it's meaningless.

My advice is you should never flirting seriously.

So if I'm actually interested in you, I take you seriously? Or else I want you to take me seriously. Or both.

Now, this is interesting. I haven't read all the way through this thread but I would say that for me, if a playful flirtatious person gets extra flirtatious, that's a definite sign...I take that to mean that the person is seriously looking to take things further. "Taking it past flirting" to me means going beyond long, lingering looks (which to me indicates serious interest, especially when it happens often--and I'm fully engaged as I'm doing it as well) and touching, for instance moving so close you are in a side=arm embrace, essentially. And someone moving up close behind you, touching your arm and hand (and you doing the same to them), and touching your legs together. And, the two of you gravitating into each other's body space frequently (much closer than just a friend would stand).

With a friend, I've taken this to mean he was definitely seriously interested. Would any of you here consider this a definition of serious flirting?

 

[SillySapienne]

If a guy is highly physically flirtatious with you he probably desires to bed you.

I wouldn't take that too seriously.

The kind of flirtation that I would take seriously, however, is when a guy shows interest in you by listening and responding to what you're saying.