bitching about Fe seems silly to me when it is done to elevate Fi. judging functions do what they do, no one is entirely happy with the results.
Fi values/feelings hang like a raincloud over the room. we get tired of watching you mope and spin your tires and sigh sigh sigh (you're doing it out loud). who hasn't gotten the judging sideways glance of Fi when overstepping one of their invisible tripwires. you don't have to cooperate, but then stay out of the way, just go home. why do i want to spend time with someone who would rather sulk than make things work well for everyone? if it's the wrong decision, or if we are the wrong deciderers, find something or someone else.
i do these things too. i am more likely to opt out than to try to convert anyone to my ideas and beliefs and vision of how things should be. (i may have stronger Fi for an infj than i realize. maybe it's just an introverted quality, and we can just blame the extroverts!). often times it may feel all wrong, oh so wrong, and i'll just feel it and hate it.
attempts to control, to express, to fit in, etc, they're relevant for all of us. agency is a question that is muddled even more than authenticity. Fi is not more pure than Fe. it does what it does to get something done for a purpose, and pretending otherwise is absurd.
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i feel like Fi has a larger space for RESPONSE than Fe. it stores its memories and assigns feeling-tones to all objects. their abstractions are based on the built-in feeling-tones that come attached with whatever object they pull up into their attention.
Fe just buzzes with whatever frequencies are around it. knowing it will eventually replicate itself in you. magnetized. it tries to maintain its own healthy happy environment internally by fixing the situation in others, directing the situation, etc.
i am trying to understand right now if EXTROVERTED JUDGING is really a more viable way of understanding or situating these functions. j types are extroverted judgers. which is directing. Fe is more about directing. Te is more about directing. it is connecting and moving forward, evolving, changing, etc. ACTION. p types are extroverted perceiving, they grow their judging functions, they store Fi or Ti associations, articles, abstracts, etc into all objects, relying on categorizing and prioritizing to be better equipped in the future to respond in a quicker way. developing their habits so that they can feel confident and comfortable with their internal organization/virtual environment to respond quickly and efficiently and handle themselves.
Fe is a process of articulating and expressing and READING feelings. it relies on other tools of information gathering, perceiving tools like Ni or Se, and it gets additional judging power from Ti. absence of expressed feeling is seen as a negative by users of Fe, just like absence of THOUGHT is seen as a negative by T people (god, could you be any more vapid and illogical????).