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  1. #11
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Considering I can get online whenever I hope I will never need more time, I'd probably die if that happened. And It's my computer, why would I lie to get on it? But for me I tend to (ab)use the internet alot more when I'm lonely, and don't really have people to hang around with in my life. So I am addicted? I don't think so. Do I use it to cope? Yes.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  2. #12
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    So are needlepoint, knitting, painting, scrap booking, reading for pleasure, gardening as in flowers, amateur writing or even meticulously cleaning all addictions too? Should people just give up what give them innocent pleasure that have always been called hobbies. They can take up massive amounts of time and total emersion to where time is forgotten. I am sure some would say they're addictions too.... however its spun... its all hype to me. People enjoy what they enjoy. I've yet to meet anyone who is actually addicted to the internet eventhough they joke about it alot. Of course, I may wake one morning to yet another new twisted definition of addiction that makes me one.

  3. #13
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    I use the internet a lot but I don't consider it a problem. I use it as an aid to my life, not as a substitute. It's true that I don't hang out with people in person very often, but if I wanted to, I would have no problem doing so. I know a lot of people and they all like me. If I was going to change anything socially, I would make more friends who are more likely to have a positive impact on me. My current group of friends do not really have the power to influence me in a negative way, but they are going nowhere, they admit it, and they don't care. I love them, and I try to help them if I can, but I've got to move on without them. (Which is what I have done for the last few years, but I just haven't gotten many new friends yet who share my ambition.)

    Ever since I was like 14, I've hated the idea of being addicted to things so I wouldn't allow myself to let it happen. As soon as I thought I liked something way too much I'd give it up for a while. (Or in many cases, permanently.) I smoked cigarettes for 8 years and I was always able to stop for a few days if I felt the need. This habit has been a very good one for me. I've given up MANY bad things by doing this.

    I've given up certain websites completely, or on trial periods. Sometimes I'll skip a few days here and there and I'll lose interest so I don't end up wasting time anymore. I've given up the internet completely, too, and it was pretty easy. You just have to fill in the gaps with something else, hopefully something better. When I quit smoking, I started brushing my teeth at work on my breaks instead of smoking. When I quit watching TV, I just started reading more. When I stopped eating gas station junk food, I lifted weights more often.

    I'd like to challenge you all to stop coming here for a while. 2 to 4 weeks. I wouldn't make a thread or a big deal about it unless lots of people were showing interest, but I think it would be fun. You could even quit going to other sites or using messengers too, and then we could all share our results after the time period is up.

    As Yoda would say: "You must train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose." It's not about self-discipline or depriving yourself from something you enjoy, it's about preventing yourself from falling into a routine that doesn't serve you in the best possible way by consciously monitoring your actions and performing experiments. Life is SHORT. Is this really how you want to spend the majority of your time?

    No, I'm not trying to talk you into anything and sorry if I seem like a cheesy self-help coach or something like that.

  4. #14
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    In response to Night:

    I'd define an addiction as a slide into a habit, which one escapes facing reality from. It incapacitates us in facing real life, simply.

    So Seanan, knitting, gardening, etc are time-out activities, just like Internet use can be, if managed properly.

    The danger is in over-use, where it becomes a crutch, as such - the same way someone obsessed with cleanliness could slide into obsessive-compulsive disorder - the classic image is of Macbeth's wife trying to wash her hands of invisible blood after the murders.

    It is no longer cleanliness that is the issue, but trying to wipe the stains of the mind?

    The same way, what are the stains of the mind I'm trying to avoid, when I delve into others' problems online, am I avoiding my own. Am I merely seeking an ether connection, because IRL, I'm not able to handle a living, breathing, irritating presence. Hard questions.

    The Internet distills us into a pure essence of thought and image. Anything else, emotion, spirit, being, becomes a matter of projection. Perhaps Ne is too subject to that.

    But here lies the seduction of the Internet - it is easy. No parent will drag a kid to a doctor if he spends 5 hours online a day. But if a kid spends 5 hours drinking/gambling/snorting substances, we can probably guess he'd be dragged off to psychologists in a week. At work we easily spend 12 hours a day on the computer. Do we even spend 5 hours a day talking with our husbands/wives/good friends.

    How is this taking away from real life interactions then - is not something giving if I give time and emotion to online activities, given a day only has 24 hours.

    Also, in effect, when we put so much time here, are we saying we're committed to this site for e.g. But how real is this commitment, given we can simply stop visiting. IRL, we cannot just turn off someone, and step back.

    So how is the Net helping me learn to gauge emotional distances, and boundaries.

    At what point am I growing and learning from the interactions, and at what point have I started avoiding harder issues IRL for the ether ones here I can solve, without having to make a commitment to.

    Makes sense, Night?

    P.S: These are just my observations based on my own interactions here, where I'm on so much a day, it is in no way saying anyone is an addict here. Except me.

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seanan View Post
    So are needlepoint, knitting, painting, scrap booking, reading for pleasure, gardening as in flowers, amateur writing or even meticulously cleaning all addictions too?
    Well, with me, I'm addicted to the Internet, but I don't really want to be. It interferes with other things out in the world that I might like to try. But I've become wedded to this habit of logging in everyday to the point where I have, for the most part, lost the confidence to do anything else, despite the fact that I'm aware there is a bigger world for me to explore. Sometimes, when I do go out, which is becoming increasingly rare, I'm just anxious to get back home and onto the computer. I think that if it's an addiction that I don't want, it should be classified as a mental disorder.

    The Internet, for me, has also become partly a source for me having unrealistic hopes and fantasies, such as, more recently, meeting someone who lives far away and forming a relationship, maybe starting a new life away from where I came from. But unfortunately, there are many complex practical realities (such as expenses and logistics) that I'm aware of, but which I find depressing. Hence, the depressing thoughts led me to just lose myself in the Internet again.

    But I think with any mental disorder, it should only be classified as such if the individual is unhappy with it.

  6. #16
    Senior Member nottaprettygal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seanan View Post
    So are needlepoint, knitting, painting, scrap booking, reading for pleasure, gardening as in flowers, amateur writing or even meticulously cleaning all addictions too? Should people just give up what give them innocent pleasure that have always been called hobbies. They can take up massive amounts of time and total emersion to where time is forgotten.
    They can be addictions. If you're scrap booking to the point that you have a massive amount of paper cuts, forget to eat, go to the bathroom, and pick up your son from soccer practice that could be the sign of an addiction.

    But I think you were right in your previous post. Not that many people actually qualify for the disorder under the classifications you listed. It doesn't mean that perhaps we shouldn't get away from our computers a bit, but most of us are healthy individuals.

    I think what might be a good sign of addiction is not how long we spend online, but our mental state in our offline life. If we're constantly thinking of an online person or game and cannot focus on reality when it's necessary to do so, that's a problem.

  7. #17
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    I know the difference between addiction and just spending a lot of time with something- I'm addicted to caffeine and nicotine, I simply choose to spend my time on the forum

    withdrawl from here doesn't give me physical symptoms and though occasionally the forum will invade my dreams it really doesn't interfere with my social life at all! (whereas my other habits do )
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

  8. #18
    Senior Member Griffi97's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LucrativeSid View Post
    I'd like to challenge you all to stop coming here for a while. 2 to 4 weeks. I wouldn't make a thread or a big deal about it unless lots of people were showing interest, but I think it would be fun. You could even quit going to other sites or using messengers too, and then we could all share our results after the time period is up.

    I was recently away for about 3 weeks, out of the country for 10 days followed by problems with a new internet connection. It wasn't a problem for me except I felt I missed out on some interesting discussions while I was away. However I'm still pretty much a newb and I don't post often so I don't think I'd be much of a candidate for addiction.

    I have been a student of MBTI for 20 years and when I found this site it was quite a revelation for me. I have been experiencing some personal issues and this site has helped expand my understanding of MBTI and the cognitive functions, which has translated into help with the personal issues I've been facing. At the same time if I feel I can contribute to a discussion at hand, or provide some insight to someone who seems to be really searching for help, I enjoy doing so.

    I have to admit when I started reading on this site I was kind of amazed by the post counts of some of the members. And it's interesting how social status seems to be linked to post count. I haven't been part of any internet social networking before other than groups I am involved in IRL, so the social aspect of this group is all new to me. However I can see how easy it would be to become immersed in it to the exclusion of other daily activities.

  9. #19
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    I laughed good at the notion that teen rebellion was being considered a mental disorder somewhere out there but this I wouldn't be so quick to discredit. I think it's an addiction comparable to others in it's nature.

    With that being said...

    "I'm Beat and I'm an internet junky."

    "Hi, Beat!"
    Last edited by swordpath; 03-28-2008 at 06:28 PM.

  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by nottaprettygal View Post
    I think what might be a good sign of addiction is not how long we spend online, but our mental state in our offline life. If we're constantly thinking of an online person or game and cannot focus on reality when it's necessary to do so, that's a problem.
    While I agree, to a point, again going with my other jist, I don't see it as a net problem... just as sex addiction isn't... If one is doing what you refer to with people known offline (avoiding the irl mindset) then its a problem and not net-related. If I neglect my repsonsibilities to family, etc. because I'm wrapped up in worry over a neighbor/friend, the same thing applies.

    I have friends going back 20 years that I've met on the net. I've met three in person but, with the rest, its geographically not feasible. They are no less important to me than those I've met physically. See why I avoided that "irl" term? They are part of my real life. I think this "irl" idea dimishes people and their importance. People on the net are still people whether they're communicating through a keyboard or not. I think forgetting that is responsible for some pretty horrendous treatment of each other. JMHO of course and some will, obviously, say I'm living in a fantasy world.. mine is just another perspective and one I live by. In fact, I think taking the view that they're less than human... like some object with which to entertain one's self or play with as a hobby could lead to addiction.

    Edit: I want to clarify something. I have had 4 groups for about 15 years... yes, people come and go but some stay and relationships develop with myself and members between themselves. It is very, very, important to some people as they have no other avenues to meet. It is one of the wonderful things about the net that I appreciate. Perhaps my perspective is due to a more slowed down life where other activities wouldn't be occurring in any case but the advantages it provides me and friends on it is invaluable.

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