I've touched upon this in other threads, but I made a CONSCIOUS decision to embrace my 'F'ness and beyond that, just be more F around 20. Because I mistakenly thought 'T' meant really cold and even argumentative and was scaring people away and my need for people (what I simplistically labelled my F) was in desperate mode.
I totally relate to you in this matter. I never realized people saw me as cold, arrogant, or standoff-ish until I was told as much at the age of was it 25? I thought I was simply private, said little unless it was worth saying, and thought about what I wanted to say. I am the type of person who grudgingly accepts that I need people then boldly pushes the need for humanity with one another the next.
For me, it's just really impossible to settle on decisions (the N exacerbates this) and my opinions on people generally vacillate wildly even hour to hour. It's calmed down a lot more with general maturity, but I feel even when I'm doing well in life and even-keeled, that things are never settled. I can come up with too many reasons for and against things which is useful, but I seriously cannot figure out what I think?/feel? about things sometimes.
Does anyone else get that? Or is that a typically NF thing?
You could just accept the T/F as being able to think multi-dimensionally. Which brings me to hotmale...
This doesn't really relate to me, but I don't have a problem separating T/F tendencies. I think I do have larger issues separating my spiritual and physical side, which are always at battle. Reality v. Fiction.
That's a bona fide T/F issue. Though, I think because you are an S, you don't see the beauty of the spiritual/physical combination. I think the two are intimately related, not fact and fiction but fact and fact. The only problem with us is that we are incapable of seeing the spiritual side without assistance (by God's Spirit).
Still...
This haunts me all the time.
The last time I checked, my T/F was 50/50.
How does one escape the vicious circle?
This in particular is my concern. How does one escape the feeling of discontent? I mean, on one hand we know (T) that a life lived and loved (F) has been a success. On the other hand, we believe (F) that a life without some distinguished accomplishment (T) is hollow. To give an example, I despise evolution. It is a humanist/atheist religion's answer to creation as it cannot be proven. Yet, it is taught as fact. Having wanted to be a biochemist, I had to take science courses which integrated evolution into the curriculum even though knowing the facts was sufficient for research such as DNA, its composition, and role in the body. Finally, I lost? interest due to being spoon-fed a world-view incompatible and undesirable to my own. Having graduated with a degree in management, I found myself highly knowledgeable about concept and theory, but in lower levels of management, it is the practical and concrete which contribute most to success. I also became disenfranchised with my understanding of how corporations have become legal entities without the responsibilities that humans have to one another, in effect soulless. So, I find myself desirous of going back to college to pursue a degree in biochemistry but so as to avoid dealing with this theory/social philosophy of evolution on a regular basis, I will likely seek a degree in chemistry. I also love the fact that I will know chemistry and chemical systems while having a hard skill to contribute to the world in times of crisis. Again, I've begun to ramble and meanwhile opened so many cans of worms. I'll re-state what INTJMom so aptly truncated:
Originally Posted by Eternue-MDL
... unfulfilled, paralyzed, dissatisfied with their perceived lack of success...
This haunts me all the time.
The last time I checked, my T/F was 50/50.
How does one escape the vicious circle?