Well, there is a man that lives in my house that tells me how useless and ugly I am every day, then punches me in the chest…if it's a sudden thing or a marked change with no obvious reason make sure it isn't a medical problem! >.<
otherwise, maybe some reflecting on what are the biggest energy-sapping things in their/your life (emotional, physical, cognitive dissonance etc) and seeing if there's ways to solve them could help! personally I find that ongoing unresolved problems, can cause a lot of background emotional stress which is extremely tiring mentally, and also spills over into physical tiredness/aches (from tension maybe?)
I'm wondering if I might be slipping back into a depression…
Well, there is a man that lives in my house that tells me how useless and ugly I am every day, then punches me in the chest…
I spend most of my time alone in my room because I want to avoid this man. We live way out in the country, so there are few people within walking distance to talk to. Those that are think I'm too weird to talk to. The snowcone stand we own in town hasn't been doing well, either.
I just stay alone in my room in bed most of the time. I feel a little better today than normal, but even sitting up is very hard, normally, from pain and exhaustion…
It's frustrating to will my body to do something, and it not do it…
I'm wondering if I might be slipping back into a depression…
Well, there is a man that lives in my house that tells me how useless and ugly I am every day, then punches me in the chest…
I spend most of my time alone in my room because I want to avoid this man. We live way out in the country, so there are few people within walking distance to talk to. Those that are think I'm too weird to talk to. The snowcone stand we own in town hasn't been doing well, either.
I just stay alone in my room in bed most of the time. I feel a little better today than normal, but even sitting up is very hard, normally, from pain and exhaustion…
It's frustrating to will my body to do something, and it not do it…
I'm wondering if I might be slipping back into a depression…
She knows some of it…okay this whole thing pisses me off so much.
does your mother know this guy is making your life hell right now?
are you still in hs?
can you go away to college very soon? you have to get out of your life situation asap. i mean...even with the coolest most lovingest of people around me i couldn't live in a town like that and to not have either would feel like a slow death to me...i would fade into an empty shell.
i know that is not helpful and will do nothing to lift your spirits and i'm so sorry for saying it anyway but i hope that you find a way to add some excitement and connection in your life
have a heart to heart with your mother and tell her you're suffocating.
She knows some of it…
They fight about it…
I am about to start my senior year.
I'll probably get money to go to school in-state, but I'll have to maintain perfect grades or I won't be able to afford to continue going and I'll be stranded here.
I've stressed so much about college majors so much that its a wonder I don't have grey hair…
Oh no your situation does sound extremely hard to deal with, and that feels like a massive understatement ): In the off chance that you haven't already thought of/ tried this, do you have other relatives or even friends from school (and their families)/trusted teachers you could live with safely? I agree that getting away from him should be a priority if at all possible ><
If you can't find any way to get away from him for now, don't lose hope. as much as it'll never make up for more real life interaction, I hope interacting online on forums like these can help you feel a little less alone and tide over the remaining of your highschool days. For college, I was wondering if there might be financial aid schemes/ scholarships which could bring you to a further college, possibly out of state?
Well, there is a man that lives in my house that tells me how useless and ugly I am every day, then punches me in the chest…
She knows some of it…
They fight about it…
Hey Magic Qwan... I keep coming back to this thread... reading... intending to respond... hitting the 'Reply With Quote' button... wanting to respond... And then becoming so overwhelmed with anger and frustration I can't bring myself to type.
I speak about this every once and a while on the site... how I was raised in a very different kind of cultural environment. And because of this... my whole life...I've struggled to try and match my behavior with what would be deemed appropriate 'on the outside.' I've struggled to learn how to bite my tongue...to seem less passionate... to hide my anger in the face of injustice...but rather remain calm and 'reasonable' *eye roll.* But I'll risk being judged poorly and tell you how I truly feel ... I feel it is probably a good thing my path will never cross with this man's you speak of above.
This is abuse MQ - you know that right? And no human being need suffer in this way. I'm not asking you to disclose the nature of this man's relationship to your Mom... but if this is a 'bf' of sorts...I want you to consider the possibility there may be higher levels of denial on her part at play (God this really pisses me off.) What I'm getting at is...you can't wait around for her to figure it out on her own...seeing as her solution so far has been to 'fight with him' about it. You are going to need to make this decision by yourself - to stand-up for yourself...your high worth...your rights...and the rights of others in a similar way. And you need to do this now.