Why are Americans so fake? Fake Smiles, fake greetings, etc? "How are you" without meaning that shit, small talk is bullshit and a way to either wast time. They think they're being courteous with one another when in reality they are RUDE AS FUCK. People should be honest with another, and instead of pretending to care, show what is within themselves. why is such a small percentage real? Don't say because it's herd mentality and a fucking problem with self, e.g Russia is nothing like this. With Russians it's rude to be friendly with others because you don't know them giving them a perception of self preservation so they won't have to stab the person at a later date, no one asks "how are you" unless they know you, and it isn't a joke question but something to be taken seriously. This attitude creates a people that are loyal to one another.
It's not rude or superficial or fake. It's our culture. It's a question that can mean different things to different people, and it's not a practice adopted by all Americans. Many people simply say "hello" and move on.
"How are you?" is an important greeting, even if you don't intend to initiate a conversation. It's a way of acknowledging another person beyond a simpler greeting. It's like saying, "I acknowledge you as a person."
Is also a social ritual. "How are you?" "I'm good, thanks. How are you?" "Good, thank you." It's a little dance you do when you meet someone, a familiar routine that everyone knows, and it's what you fall back on when strangers come together. Silence is rude, but they don't know each other, so they do the little dance. The good intentions are genuine, even if they have nothing to say to each other.
It is an invitation for the other person to be revealing, if they want to. Maybe you asked it to just do the customary social steps, but people will surprise you. I worked retail for 12 years. That's 12 years of doing this with the general public, thousands of total strangers. Many times, I asked the question to just go through the motions because it is polite and important to acknowledge the people around you, and many times I was pleasantly surprised when people gave me a genuine answer and allowed me to see a little piece of who they were as a person before we parted ways. I heard about their plans for the day, projects being built, weddings and birthdays they were shopping for, and so on. I suppose those look like hollow answers, but if you're just listening to the words, then you're not paying attention. I saw the emotions and the sentiments behind the answers, and seeing the way their minds worked and the way they were being thoughtful about their loved ones was always a bright spot on my day.
There's also another important reason for inquiring after the well-being of a stranger: You might be the only one who's asked them. As I said earlier, many people just say hello and go about their business. We take for granted assuming that everybody has somebody. There have been many people I asked who needed to be asked. I received replies about deaths in the family, stressful days, maybe they weren't feeling well. There were also people who would hesitate because my question caught them off guard, then seem relieved and say they were good; I could tell they weren't, but being asked seemed to make them feel better.
So, that's my answer to your question. You don't need to reach deep into the heart of something to feel as though you've experienced something with substance. I enjoy the deeper conversations too, when I am able to have them with someone simulating, but I appreciate all the quick little "small talk" encounters I have too, because there is no such thing as empty communication.
