Uh oh, here comes trouble.
To answer your question, not exactly. The three 'instincts' reside at the unconscious level; so to say you're "looking for intensity,†doesn’t sound right to me. I think it's more like you're naturally attracted, attracting, and repelling people as an sx/sp. Instincts.
just to be clear...i was using her wording. i don't feel like i'm looking for intensity. i'm just very aware of the chemistry or spark between people but can also be very private.
this is where i get confused a lot of the time.
lemme just walk you through my day... if i may?
i go to the coffee shop this morning. i have a hard time keeping my head forward and tend to look at the ground a lot in order to avoid eye contact. i feel like when i make eye contact, that i feel these connections between me and whoever i'm looking at or is looking at me. i feel like people feel that from me, too. i also have so much swirling around in my head, like, "why did i make this person... uncomfortable and shifty? do they just think i'm pretty? did i give them a weird vibe?" etc. and this happens between me and the few people i pass by. (i've also considered i'm simply neurotic and paranoid.) i get to the barrista. she avoids looking at me too. i know she is. and she always does. it makes me uneasy.
waiting tables can be difficult because of this, too. so i go to work, and and always hyper aware of automated movements and eye contact and thought processes behind them when i'm waiting on people. sometimes there can be one single person in the dining room, though i may not know them, that may throw me off of my normal duties. it's like i've singled this one person out. i've done it in classrooms. at work waiting tables. going to the coffee shop. going to the bar. doesn't matter. buying groceries. it can be male or female, so it's not merely a sexual attraction kind of thing. it's sort of like i just tune into one person and become curious. though i also often see myself as creepy. maybe i use SP as a shield, first, when perhaps SX is more natural to me? i tune in, but i'm closed off. and i rarely make contact with people, especially when intensity is involved. i think i just see it as too vulnerable. and when i feel vulnerable and exposed, i close everyone off. i hide away in my house and my bedroom.
where i work, we have lots of regulars. i also live in a small town. i see lots of the same 100, 200 or whatever it is, faces, every single day. and the longer i'm here, the more i've locked on to different people around me that i'm exposed to and have become curious about them or their lives, etc. i pick up minor details here and there and form pictures of these people. there are also some people that i notice strong intensity with, though i'm unsure of what it implies. but for whatever reason, these people scare me. i find my heart jumping a lot when i cross paths with these people. even if i'm not attracted to them, but feel as though they've also picked me out of a crowd.