I think the title of this thread should be "Not being FJ or SJ isn't an Excuse". I am very frank and direct with what I think, and people are always getting offended by my beliefs and opinions. I think it's them who should be sorry for being so damn easy to offend. I mean, I say things in a pretty gentle way and I'm not forceful or unfriendly, but most people are just offended by the very fact that I am unapologetic about my beliefs and have confidence. SJs who are older than me are all like "stop being disrespectful" and I'm like "it's not disrespect, it's confidence. stop telling me what to do". FJs are like "why can't you just go along with everyone else" and I'm like "ah, because I actually have an opinion". I mean, I understand being mad when someone is just being a douche bag, but healthy communication is just not possible if both parties can't here the honest truth.
What you're describing is more of the typical "let us all get along"-Fe-Dom/Aux-Attitude and the "everything has to stay in the status quo"-Si-Dom/Aux-Attitude and I completely agree with you there.
But there is also the "But what about my ethic standarts???"-Fi. I have to admit that I clashed often with that together in rl discussions. Not a perfect example, but something like 2-3 weeks ago in my history tuition:
We were discussing about the assumed rape by Assange. I stated that, by the research I did, it seems quite likely that it's neither a CIA-arrangement nor an actual rape, but rather a personal campagne of that two women against Assange, because Julian is polygamous asshole. I backed it up with some data, like telefonates, how long the supposed victim was with him, known sms, etc.
Than a girl, obviously emotionally involved, attacked this statement with the argument that she "would never do such a thing" and because of that, she "can't think that these womens would do it either", and so it has to be a CIA-Arrangement. I obviously hurted here personally with my words because I seemingly broke here ethics by supposing such a thing, which is, as far as I know, a Fi-thing, especially combined with Ne, because this intuitive connection between herself and these woman is rather a Ne-thing.
I were pretty baffled by her reaction because it didn't even came to my mind that I could hurt someone by my statement.
I don't mean that I see every NFP like that, imho her reaction was quite immature. But it's just an example how Fi CAN also react personally involved to an unpersonally supposed statement - by breaking their ethic codex. And Ne can often make leaps between things where most would never think thate there are links(and too often, there actually AREN'T links anyway).