Type = INFp
T said:
Logic over sentiment
Critical, then supportive
Decides with head
Truth before tact
Sees conflict as natural
Good at being critical
At ease with the impersonal
Seeks to ignore emotion
Interested in things-then-people
Often prefer non-fiction
I am more likely to act like a Thinker and:
Have truth as my objective.
Decide more with my head.
Prefer on principle to question others' findings, believing their findings may be inaccurate
See my encounters with people as having a purpose.
Notice ineffective reasoning.
Choose truthfulness over tactfulness.
Critique and point out the negatives, overlooking the positives.
Focus my attention on universal principles.
Deal with people firmly, as required.
Expect the world to run on logical principles. (but I've learned it often does not)
Sentiment over logic
Supportive, then critical
Decides with heart
Tact before truth
Takes conflict personally
Good at being appreciative
At ease with the personal
Attach to emotion
Interested in people-then-things
Often prefer fiction
I am more likely to act like a Feeler and:
Have harmony as my objective. (when aplictable to friends and family)
Decide more with my heart.
Prefer to agree with others' findings, believing people are worth listening to.
See my encounters with people as friendly and important in themselves.
Notice when people need support. (at least material emotional support or a helping hand)
Choose tactfulness over truthfulness.
Overlook people's negative points, stressing areas of agreement.
Focus my attention on personal motives. (but usually with suspicion)
Deal with people compassionately, as needed.
Expect the world to recognize individual differences. (diversity is good, and real)
I see being supportive and critical and being truthful and tactful and being intertwined. My goal in a conversation where those things are a factor is to be tactful, honest and provide support while addressing the things I feel I need to be critical about - that may mean sugar coating things, but it does not mean sacrificing honesty to do so.
That comparison chart got me thinking about conflict vs harmony and how it relates to F/T...
If there are unresolved problems between two or more persons (or creatures
), then that will affect the mood of those persons involved (which results in the atmosphere of harmony being at risk if not nullified) and that will have a negative effect on their interactions with each other and possibly third parties as well (depending on how much they compartmentalize). I see conflict as existing in that case even if it goes unspoken (and unseen to those not involved), so steps should be taken to talk things out and make an effort to resolve the conflicts (whether or not they go unspoken, they are felt and internalized and causing more harm than good by doing so). In that regard, I see conflict as natural and necessary, but its also easy to end up taking it personally too if anger and hostility are involved.
I think what happens for me is that when I detect a reduction in harmony levels, then I seek to determine the reason and find possible solutions to resolve it, and that often means addressing conflict, but conflict can often be resolved with civility if all affected parties are willing to approach it in that manner. If a disagreement is resolved through polite civil conversation to address the misunderstandings, did a conflict occur, or would that be a resolution that did not involve conflict?
A more grey area of the concept of conflict is that of being argumentative. When one is argumentative
and hostile, then that seems to be clearly associatable with conflict, but when two people are participating in a more emotionally detached verbal sparing match (for example arguing over the interpretation of a poorly worded rule), is that conflict? To an outward observer, they are seeing a spirited argument and may or may not realize that its not personal so they might see it as conflict, but what is the dividing line for what is or is not conflict?
As a male with an F preference, I found your description of F males to be very acurate and I would strongly agree that finding friends that do not make me feel pressured to conform to the steroetypes of what a male "should be" makes a huge difference.