You still have to take responsibility for your actions, regardless. Your actions have effects, whether somebody punishes you or LIFE punishes you. there is no escape just because somebody wants to play victim. In most cases, both the man and the woman who messed up and created a child are responsible, and accountable for what they choose to do from then on. It applies to every other aspect of decision making in life, and it applies to this subject as well. Life is not fair. The world is not just. We make choices, we must live with the results of those choices. Things happen to us that really are out of our control, then we make CHOICES on how to respond, choices that are in our control. That is my point. The situation ends up different for everyone in regards to abortion, but nobody has grounds to suggest somebody is completely and wholly excused from how they choose to react to whatever situation may have given rise to the child being created. When you have the power to use your brain and make a choice in life, that is YOURS to own, and nobody elses. You are responsible for the choice you made and all the choices you didn't make.
Well, I think that part, I addressed very specifically earlier: I don't think I ever have thought or suggested that someone could be wholly excused from the responsibility for their decisions.
It's also ironic because 10-15 years ago, I think I was writing posts that aren't a lot different than what you're saying here. If one thing was beaten into me by my childhood, it was an excruciating T-rigor of responsibility. I was pretty merciless in how I judged others and ever far worse in how I judged myself, and there were no excuses for any choice that was below the rational ideal. I was pretty relentless in my beliefs this way, and it really affected the quality of my life and relationships for many years. I had the same opinion on the abortion topic as what you describe in your posts.
One of the things that changed is that, earlier in life, I thought I had all the answers and the "right way" to view the situation. Later, I realized many of my conclusions were drawn based on my own values, of which I did not have actual hard evidence, and while it's necessary in life to fight for what I believed to be true, I also had to be fair and respectful of people who had different values
if I perceived they were attempting to the best of their ability to be true, virtuous, and responsible for their decisions. (I don't know how better to qualify that statement right now.)
I don't think you still yet see the inflexibility within your perspective... the sense that you have the only handle on truth here and so you can judge others as harshly about what is responsible and what is not as you'd judge yourself if you were in this position and chose to abort.
I
totally believe you when you say in a later post that you wouldn't abort, although obviously you will never be in that situation yourself, directly. Your commitment to this particular position is very evident to me. And it's very admirable to me that you would do that. You're certainly not a hypocrite.
The point, though, is that it is
not your responsibility to decide for other people what
their responsibility should be. You can decide what
your responsibility should be, and you can have a strong opinion about what
their responsibility should be, but
taking responsibility for other people by controlling their behavior or treating them as deficient/irresponsible in your mind if they choose another path for
whatever reason seems like a lack of humility to me (just like I judge myself for that period of my life when I held similar views, I lacked humility in some crucial ways) and diminishes/undermines potential dialog and growth for everyone. The rigor of the position you're expecting others to adhere to is not realistic for many, it's only realistic for you and those like you, and so you're going to have to find a different way to approach it if you want to help people embrace the solution(s) you value.
But don't mind me, I'm just a right wing nut.
Gee. Do
not put yourself down like that.
I actually found your last number of posts here extremely brave and insightful, and I think you've added a
lot to the conversation. Even if I disagree with some of your premises, I've seen very few posts that were worded so well, strongly, and coherently; and if they weren't, I wouldn't waste my time responding to them. You've definitely helped boost this conversation to the Next Level, whatever that is.