And how should a person who is put in authority over an ENFP (teacher, boss, parent etc) then attempt to lead? Obviously even if you feel that you do not need specific rules, it doesn't work to have totally different rules for each individual within a classroom or within a workplace. I think guidelines are needed not just for the immature, but also the bigger the organization, the more built in accountability needs to happen because there is less individualized accountability possible.
I can see this posing serious problems for an ENFP wanting to do well in school or advancing their career. It appears to some other types as a childish expression of "Your not the boss of me" without considering the request. I think that in many cases, they have valid ideas, but the way in which they are presented arouses a feeling of resistance within the audience they are expressing their thoughts to. I don't want to be dismissive of people, and yet even on the forum I sometimes see these rebel without a cause kind of threads and am inclined to react in an uncharacteristically dismissive and harsh way, whereas if they had contacted me saying that they had a concern that they needed help solving, I would take their worries much more seriously and do whatever I could to ameliorate the situation.
I freely admit that I am looking at this through Fe/Ti eyes and my intent is not to be offensive, but rather to understand what it looks like from your vantage point that would explain the very different kinds of reactions that seem to be typical of us respectively.
I understand that this has something to do with the whole Fe/Fi issue, but I really am not sure how to go at it or how to see it in a way that makes sense to me somehow. Please help!
So-I actually wanted to post this thought in the other thread as well but was rushed due to holiday travels-whenever you are utterly confused about why we do something-do this very weird little mental excercise.
Imagine a world only made of up Te/Fi users (or Fe/Ti users). (I realize this seems artificial-but it seems to work very well...) Identify the natural pairings in this world-INTJ/ENFP as an illustrative example. Then identify what affect the behavioral pattern in question would have upon that intended recipient and how that behavior could alter the course of action of a larger group under the recipient's leadership.
(Sorry it gets a bit Si detail oriented here....) Take the bizarre behavior in question-the enfp loud protest rather than a more subtle expression of an issue-and imagine it in the context of how you would get an INTJ to alter a course of action. The extroverted protest gets the attention of an INTJ. INTJs are exceptionally direct and lead with a very direct style thus to get their attention the complaint needs to be just as direct. The externalization of the Fi cause will cause the INTJ to recognize the moral implications, sort of hesitation-when normally they would be more likely to stay on the NiTeSe course of action. Once you have the INTJs attention, if the cause really is worthy-from both Te and Fi judgments-then you may sway the TeSe course of action accordingly. This particular pattern also works well with ENTJs if the emo component is toned down and it is an exceptionally good cause backed up with data. (ENTJs love me) It can work with ESTJs but you have to be very careful to mold the protest into a controlled frame-they will still find it weird-but oddly admirable. ISTJs need less Fi but more Te. Other ENFPs think it is perfectly normal.
This loud protest style totally backfires with EXTP leadership. The ISFJs are horrified and the ESFJ baffled.
So there is a good reason we protest-we stand up with an Fi cause to influence a Te led/structured society-which totally backfires when applied to an Fe audience. The mix of Te/Fe in the group in question seems to determine how effective the protest is in achieving change.
^^We dont really think about this modification of the Te power structure consciously. I cant emphasize how weird that would be. It just seems to be the results or a very innate reactionary response on our part. It feels VERY compelling, authentic and sincere, even if it looks totally bonkers. It has to be authentic for the Te users to trust us it seems...thus that passionate, sincere undertone really seems to influence them.
Since it is so innate however you will see it backfire when we are under emo stress or we are taking an external pain and extrapolating it to others around us. Every one should get a say-then their issue will be addressed via Te vs Fi judgment. "I recognize this seems unfair or hurtful and I can see why. However for reasons X, Y and Z we must continue forward in this direction."
There is also a very natural innate maturity component-as I mentioned regarding myself and authority. When young we protest everything-sort of like we need some practice to find what battles are really worth standing up for and which rules are worth fighting against. As we age, we gain a greater appreciation for following rules-but still maintain the ability to stand up when an issue is very important, and influence changes for the betterment of others. We selectively pick our battles. I suspect this is a Te and Si maturation.
For fun-imagine an INFJ/ENTP interaction in an Fe/Ti world with Fe leadership. The motive may be similar-to help others by altering the path of the group-but the way that is done stands in stark contrast to the tactics used in a Te led group. I suspect Ti is used on a one-on-one basis to influence more subtly, then the larger group dynamics will be modified more by Fe interactions.
^^However these are just my sloppy ideas based upon what I have seen in my workplace, thus I would love correction and feedback...