I just meant I don't understand you. I respect your utter brilliance and I recognize that that's what causes the communication barriers between us. I didn't mean you were actually crazy. Sorry.
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You get it I wont labour... dont' take offense at the other thread... it's just really common for non NTs to think NTs are mentally ill when there is nothing wrong with them at all. So don't take offense...
See, yeah, he'll say he's only frustrated when his tone of voice sounds angry. It's hard because I always listen to tone of voice more than I do the words people use.
Yes - NT's are often very direct in saying whats in their heads... they dont get you are recieving it in an emotional way..... You will know when an NT is angry
So I'm supposed to work on my own issues even though he doesn't want to work on his? That seems like a huge unfair double standard to me.
Yes of course you are. its the only person you can change after all (and to be honest it's you that are stating you have a problem not him)
. IF he is telling you all the time to fix your life - then you may have a degree of justification at point out his flaws... but right now you are attacking him with your point of view... and
it is an attack.
You wantting to work on yourself is your own choice, his desire not to work on himself is his choice..... and trust me he works on himself infinately more than you do, but not in a way you value or perhaps see - ENTPs are all about self growth...
You are not his judge or boss or parent, it's not up to you to tell him he needs to work on himself... Support him if he asks for help or sounds like he needs a friend but don't tell him he needs to change who he is. it would bug the hell out of you if people pointed out your weak points and told you to change...
yeah, he usually doesn't like to deliberate to help me understand, and he hates being repetitive (although he'll repeat the same statement the same exact way if I don't operate in response or accord to it).
He doesn't have the teaching skills to be able to reframe his thinking into a style you cna get.
You might want to suggest to him to draw you a diagram or other style that you wold get - different people have different learning styles.
He may not have the communication skills to change how he communicates his idea to you - so he might not be abel to convert his idea to a picture or to less abstract language.
In order for his ideas to be valued he will need to work on that as an issue for him... there are book on how to communicate your ideas... but that is his issue.
You may choose to practice understanding abstract concepts a very SP problem. SP's use concrete language and are less impaginative.. NT's think and use abstract language... You can change yourself but improving your abstract thinking through practice of looking communication you dont' normally get easily.
IT's hard for you because your way of learning is different so it all feels a bit messed up when you hear it... suggest he explains it in a way you can get... he might not be able to do that, but at least you understand he is not just repeating himself because either of you are stupid - you just have different language skills, he just lacks breath of communication and you lack the ability to understand abstract concepts...
No, only when they criticize him.
Most peoples idea of a good time is to be criticised in a public space... always a pleasure...
Id' respond badly too.. He is likely to be defensive
hope this helps and really don't be offended by the other thread...