I'm in a PM conversation on PerC with someone asking about this, and had written something putting it in a way that deserved posting here:
So I see this simple table really does not cover the modification of the temperaments across the three areas enough. It really can't, so that way I conceived it, one has to imagine what a cross of I C and A does to the overall behavior.
If I say "everyone is in, but you have to reach out and invite me", yet once the person is in, then it suddenly becomes "I'm the Boss", then most everyone will be sorry they accepted the invitation, (let alone them having had to move to accept me)! No one would then want to be bothered.
So what's going to happen? I'm going to have to tone down trying to be "boss" in order to make the Inclusion need more likely to be met.
So this again is why many I's and/or P's who are NT won't identify with Choleric. But again, Melancholy is close, and especially Phlegmatic-Melancholy (^kma^), which is right next to it.
Also, the way this works, is that you have to pass the Inclusion criteria first, with directives having more strict criteria, and informatives being more open to accept anyone. Once in a relationship, you encounter the Control area, and eventually, the Affection area, which is the deepest level, and the last you would normally encounter.
So you can't necessarily expect a Choleric in Control to readily begin bossing others around, or a Supine in Control to accept bossing around by others. You have to get past Inclusion to begin with. So a Behind the Scenes might look more passive, while an In Charge will still appear bossy, regardless of the conative temperament.