DiscoBiscuit
Meat Tornado
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2009
- Messages
- 14,794
- Enneagram
- 8w9
I would like to think that I attract a little bit of every kind
Mostly, IMHO narrow minded or intellectually weak persons or people who are basically OK persons, but I see them more as friends not potential dates. Sucks to be me, lol
I am actually quite good at hearing what isn't being said, but I like to have tangible proof of that. S vs N in this context may in part be a difference of motivations and methods of gaining attention. Ns send out very subtle signals, and want another N to pick up on these. My thoughts when I pick up on these signals is "well if they really liked me they would do something about it" (this is assuming that I am not too crazy about them).
And on the contrary, it makes me very uncomfortable when things like this are vague, while it makes you uncomfortable to be blunt.
When I'm interested in an N and they're interested in me, it works out though. I pick up on the nuances, and then I take action to take things further. But if it's one sided it's a bit weird.
Yeah when people are being too ambiguous I just drop the entire thing and get frustrated (it's usually noticeable). An example of that was an ENFP chick liked me a lot, and she was being very hot and cold. She would just continue to be ambiguous when I was asking questions to understand her positions, and I just gave up entirely. She didn't understand it, was asking me what was wrong, etc. Ugh. She obviously liked me, but didn't seem to want to date or anything like that. Confused the hell out of me to say the least. I think that ENFPs use their Ne to be ambiguous, and with their understanding of Fi know how to use this to affect people even more with their ambiguities. I like ENTPs though, their Ne Fe combo makes the implications a lot more obvious, and even fun to figure out.
That's different than what I was thinking of, which is someone who, though subtle means, lets you know they're interested but then follows through with an indication they're willing to take it further. I don't dislike bluntness--as a matter of fact at some point I need it.
Bolded is exactly the issue. There is signaling, then I follow up that signaling, but it's one sided there. They don't reciprocate. Asking someone out is a blatant display of interest, and as long as you stay true to that interest and don't respond in an ambiguous way, it will all be smooth.When you say that "if they really liked me they'd do something about it," fear of rejection (sensitivity) might keep an NF from being too direct. Though it sounds like the issue here is that you're being pretty direct about your interest and they're not giving you any clear signals at all, just blowing hot and cold. An NF (or this one anyway) will step out of her Fi and Ni and risk letting a man know they're interested by complimenting them, asking them out, but stopping short of actually saying..."I'm interested, are you?" At least I can't do that when my heart is too vested in the person. I would need him to take a chance...or just make it clear, and ask me out to dinner or over to his place.
Well of course he's not going to take the next step. How long have you been doing this with him? He's an INTP, they are pretty bad with emotions, especially romantic ones. It's a relief to them to have someone else do all of the initiating. He probably feels deeply for you but doesn't know what to do. Expecting that of him is futile... INTP males often get annoyed in romance because of the expectations put upon them like these.I'm waiting now for him to take it further. I've been conflicted thinking that I need to be more blunt--to let him know I've been attracted to him for some time. But that's just too risky for me (we work fairly closely together). Doesn't a man usually take this step? We are both INXP; I feel he knows what's going on between us as he initiated things with me. There's been romantic light touching, obvious flirtation, laughter, great communication, and a genuine understanding and care for one another. All of that (or most of it) has been in a work context. We have gone out together for lunch and I've asked him), and the interest never flags.
Doesn't a man usually take this step?
When INTPs do come around to initiating, it's usually awkward and makes them uncomfortable. It usually takes them a while.
I personally like energetic people, happy people who aren't trying to play some mind game on me. I'm not into that. Just be blunt in your feelings and smooth in your approach and its a go
I like ENTPs though, their Ne Fe combo makes the implications a lot more obvious, and even fun to figure out.
No. ENTPs are just lunatic ranters.
Yeah but then we can confuse you into believing we're brilliant
oh, you edited it! BAD PIZZA BAAD *cartoon fight*
Yeah but then we can confuse you into believing we're brilliant
oh, you edited it! BAD PIZZA BAAD *cartoon fight*
I know you guys are smart somewhere on the inside, but you sure have a strange way of showing it! I mean, this guy isn't stupid by any means. I just don't usually understand how he comes to any conclusions, even after he explains his thought process. I end up thinking "ok, so you have these facts and somehow you think it makes sense that....WHAT?!"
are you sure ur not describing an enfp ? : P
Violence is for the weak!*begins to violently erase you starting with your big bear mouth*
Violence is for the weak!
*hypnotise you into forgeting he started the cartoon fight*
Haha, definitely ENTP
I know you guys are smart somewhere on the inside, but you sure have a strange way of showing it!
Violence is for the weak!
*hypnotise you into forgeting he started the cartoon fight*
I know you collect these day and night and store redbull cans in your fridge daily to keep up with the latest bear fashionIt's on now, bear!