I haven't added anything here in a while, so why not throw down something random?
How about a love triangle?
Type One with Type Four
What Each Type Brings to the Relationship
Enneagram Ones and Fours have an intense mutual interest to bring something good and beautiful into the world. Both are idealistic and concerned with getting it right in their work and self-expressions. Both see how things could be, how a project could become an expression of an ideal form, if all went well. By working together, something universal and transcendent could result in their work and in their relationship itself. Ones bring a desire for objectivity, truth, value, and reason to the relationship. They offer self-discipline, good work habits, and regularity to the relationship. Ones are conscientious and will sublimate themselves and their personal needs for the greater good, including the shared vision and goals that they feel are at the core of the relationship itself. Ones can act as valuable sounding boards for Fours, offering advice and wisdom when Fours get confused by the multitude of their feelings or their self-doubts. Fours bring creativity, intense feelings, sensuality, spontaneity, inspiration, and the ability to tap into dreams, the unconscious, and other universal forces. Their expressiveness and emotionality can be a welcome counterbalance to the One's typical formality and sense of order and reason.
Fours give Ones permission to explore and express the full range of the One's feelings and passions. Ones help Fours actualize their dreams by supporting creativity with healthy self-discipline and appropriate structure. In general, Ones bring self-restraint to the relationship, which may act as a model for Fours, who tend to be more unregulated. Both types have a taste for refinement, beauty, and a cultivation of the arts, and if both appreciate what the other offers, they can make a long lasting, productive team that helps balance the limitations of the other while bringing out qualities that each lacks—one of the primary functions of all good relationships.
Potential Trouble Spots or Issues
A relationship between Ones and Fours can sometimes be like mixing oil and water: they tend to separate quickly because they see things from the opposite points of view. Ones think that they are almost always being sensible and objective, while Fours do not try to be "objective"—they want to see things from the subjective, personal side. While both bring a kind of idealism to the relationship, it is usually idealism applied to different things. Ones will be idealistic about social causes, morality, politics, and global issues, while Fours are idealistic, even perfectionistic, about aspects of their personal lives—their lifestyle, their mate, and their choice of work. Both can reinforce each other's sense of superiority, leading to elitism and snobbery toward others. Both can become disdainful and condescending toward those who have less breeding, taste, or sense of refinement—and the habit of being disappointed in others can be turned against each other as well.
Both types are ironically highly aware of their impulses, their sensuality, their longings and frustrations, but they both attempt to handle these issues in diametrically different ways. Thus, one of the biggest areas of conflict between Ones and Fours is in self-discipline versus self-indulgence, between personal and emotional impulses either being acted out (Fours) or being suppressed (Ones). Ones can begin to see Fours as hopelessly emotional, self-absorbed and self-indulgent, while Fours can begin to see Ones as insufferably rigid, judgmental, and cold. Fours can become as angry, critical, intolerant, and self-righteous as low-functioning Ones, and Ones can become as melancholy, self-pitying, alienated, and depressed as low-functioning Fours. In short, Ones and Fours may end by being disaffected with each other for being the way they are: they are not an imagined ideal. Both can be unforgiving, keeping scores and remembering long-past hurts. The relationship can deteriorate into bitter frustration with each other and end as the result of rancorous arguments.
Type Four with Type Seven
What Each Type Brings to the Relationship
Enneagram Fours and Sevens tend to be intrigued by each other since they are a generally a case of opposites attracting. Fours tend to be quiet, introverted, self-doubting, emotional, and pessimistic, while Sevens tend to be outgoing, extroverted, self-confident, mental, and optimistic. Sevens help Fours overcome shyness and a possible reluctance to try new experiences. Fours help Sevens stay focused on what they really want—and to respect and allow their feelings. Fours and Sevens bring to their relationship the charge and mystery of their differences—that they think so differently, react so differently, and find pleasure in such different ways. They can therefore become intrigued by the other, finding him or her endlessly fascinating, always ready with something new and unexpected.
Both Fours and Sevens bring a capacity for joy and ecstasy, spontaneity, emotion, and for passion. Both Fours and Sevens love lively conversation and they can pass hours sharing with each other detailed accounts of the events of the day as well as their thoughts and reactions. Both Fours and Sevens love the finer things of life, travel, good food, wine, clothes, and furnishings, and, for better or worse, both can tend to overspend their incomes on what they consider life's necessities—caviar, champagne, and another trip to Europe. They both have a love of the new and a sense of adventure and romance that can keep their relationship fresh and lively for themselves and be a source of joy and inspiration for others. Both types can be funny, irreverent, and entertaining. There is also an earthiness and bawdiness to both, as well as, paradoxically, a sophistication and elitism. Being opposites, Fours and Sevens can balance each other: Fours bringing a sense of depth and interiority, while Sevens contribute a sense of fun and emotional resilience
Potential Trouble Spots or Issues
Because they are so different in many ways, Fours and Sevens must have several strong points of attraction or else they will likely miss connecting with each other. Unless some strong passion (romantic, mental, or spiritual) keeps them together, they are likely to fly apart if there are any deep disagreements or conflicts early in the relationship. Both types tend to be impulsive and to be easily frustrated with others when they are disappointed or if their life circumstances do not go as they expect. Both have high expectations for the kind of attention and quality of interactions they want from others, and if they are not forthcoming, both tend to not give others too many second chances to prove themselves. While Fours may admire and even secretly envy the Seven's resilience and high energy, they may also find themselves worn down by their fast-paced lives and what feels to Fours like the Seven's relentless plans and activities. Fours can see Sevens as too noisy, superficial, and insensitive-and occasionally coarse and insulting without realizing it.
On the other hand, Sevens may admire and try to imitate the Four's artistic flair, creativity, and appreciation of subtlety and beauty. But Sevens can also see Fours as hypersensitive, ineffectual, impractical, moody, and self-absorbed. In addition, if the relationship worsens, Fours usually become more withholding and hostile, sniping at the other from a safe distance. Sevens become more impatient, abrasive, and can be verbally abusive. Fours may want to talk about everything that has gone wrong with the relationship in great detail with the Seven. By contrast, Sevens typically want to move on to something more promising and upbeat. The result is that underlying problems do not get resolved adequately. Once this relationship curdles, virtually everything each admired and was attracted to in the other becomes irritating and insufferable.
Type Seven with Type One
What Each Type Brings to the Relationship
Enneagram Ones and Sevens have a particular complementary and reciprocal relationship. They are opposites who can either bring something needed to the other person, thereby helping both to achieve new growth (or, as we will see) they can drive each other further apart by playing on each other's weaknesses whether consciously or not. Ones bring conscientiousness, orderliness, good work habits, methodical attention to detail, and a pleasure in maintaining excellence and high standards. Sevens bring spontaneity, high energy, curiosity, an orientation toward fun and adventure, the desire to try new things, and an ability to not get too hung up with getting everything done perfectly. Both types can be initiators and planners, future-oriented and idealistic, although Sevens tend to prefer having multiple options and to keep all plans loose enough so that they can be changed as needed. They bring freedom and spontaneity. Ones are more methodical and help Sevens stay on track—they resist getting distracted by too many options, and excel at following through with their plans.
Sevens offer Ones a sense of excitement and life as a source of pleasure and enjoyment. Ones offer Sevens a sense of purpose and idealism, as well as direction and the feeling that life is noble and meaningful. Sevens keep Ones' spirits up, refreshing their idealism while preventing the relationship from becoming too heavy. Ones help steady Sevens, keeping them working systematically and consistently toward goals. Sevens appreciate the One's consistency and reliability and are glad to have someone who can attend to details. These two types can be highly supportive of each other as long as their ultimate values are congruent and as long as they are both working for the same fundament things in life. This tends to be a stimulating relationship for both—they stretch each other and are fascinated and challenged by their differences.
Potential Trouble Spots or Issues
As stress increases, Ones become increasingly critical, judgmental, inflexible, and insistent that things be done only one way, the right way—their way. They inevitably begin to see Sevens as undisciplined and inefficient, self-centered and childish. Ones feel that Sevens are scattered and tend to fool around too much, over-extending resources and overbooking themselves and promising too much to too many people. Ones also often feel that Sevens are unfocused and scattered simply to annoy them and to get back at them passive-aggressively, without seeming to be hostile or petty themselves. On the other hand, Sevens tend to see lower functioning Ones as too prissy and perfectionistic, and ultimately, as someone who needs to be kicked in the pants to loosen them up a bit. Conflicts between these two types also often focus on organizational and financial matters, with Ones feeling that Sevens are profligate and wasteful while Sevens feel Ones are too tight-fisted and have no vision or pizzazz.
Sevens eventually tire of the One's continual criticism and dissatisfaction with them. Pursuing other options in the relationship becomes more and more attractive since Sevens deeply resist feeling trapped or being in situations that continually produce unhappiness. Unfortunately, low functioning Ones continually contribute to this. If matters continue to deteriorate, Ones will lose respect for Sevens who become increasingly pushy and demanding, with a calloused, vulgar tone. Ones find this extremely embarrassing to be around, and can become disillusioned and depressed, withdrawing emotional connection from Sevens. Thus, a disdainful contempt for the other can enter the picture from both sides, making reconciliation even more difficult. Ones criticize Sevens for a while, then silently give up on them until some event spells the fatal blow to the relationship.