Maybe this will help:
INTPs:
*Appeal to their craving for new ideas, theories, and systems (eg. give them a book on a topic they know little about and then discuss it with them).
*Join them on intellectually stimulating dates such as a visit to a science museum or computer fair.
*Engage them in intellectual discussion and debate on any topic they are interested in.
*Respect their uniquely analytical way of looking at the world.
(
LoveType)
How to Love an INTP
* Respect my privacy and independence.
* Appreciate my competencies and wealth of creative ideas.
* Encourage me to spend time alone.
* Don't talk too much or force an emotional conversation before I'm ready.
* Try not to nag me about being messy or meeting deadlines.
* Above all - give me plenty of space to pursue my interests in depth and time to think things through.
They are curious, independent, and strong willed, but also tend to be reticent to share their emotions, fears, or worries. While they are creative, logical, and innovative, they are also usually critical, argumentative, and ignore rules or authority.
What works with INTPs:
* respect their privacy and look for common interests to foster closeness and intimacy
* don't fuss over them, let them try to do things for themselves and learn from the consequences of their successes and failures
* expect to be challenged often as they strive to achieve perfection in their arguments
Parents of INTPs: they'll know you really love them when you... send them to Space Camp.
(
Personality Type Welcome - book headquarters for Do What You Are - Nurture By Nature - Just Your Type - The Art of Speedreading People)
Loving
For the INTP, love has three distinct phases: falling in, staying in, and getting out. These phases relate to their thinking preference and its need for order and sequence.
An INTP characterized falling in love as a stage of complete loss of rationality that may last a year or less. When an INTP falls in love, he or she falls hard - an all or nothing phenomenon. At this stage, INTPs are likely to be very lively, almost giddy, in their new love. The experience rushes over them and carries them along. They do not structure or control it but simply enjoy and experience it. They do many loving things and they are curious about their loved one and are able to overlook his or her flaws. They may bravely ignore the realities of distance, weather, and time to be with the loved one.
As relationships progress to the staying-in-love phase, INTPs begin to evaluate their structure and form. They may withdraw at this point because they are moving toward their more customary inward style. Outward demonstrations of affection lessen, and the giddy state changes. Interactions are more matter of fact, perhaps even impersonal. INTPs take their commitments to their partner seriously; however, they may not discuss these commitments at any length with their partner or with other people, because their commitments seem so obvious to them.
Falling out of love, which may not always occur, results from an analysis of the real expectations and needs of the relationship. Often an undefined line is crossed that neither partner knows about ahead of time. However, the INTP knows after the line has been crossed, and then the relationship deteriorates or ends. If INTPs recognize their emotions and needs as valid, they are able to sever relationship ties fairly cleanly. However, if they misjudge their own needs and those of their partner, the breakup can be messy, perhaps affecting other aspects of their lives for a long time. If the INTP shares some common interests with the former loved one, the relationship continues but on a different level. When INTPs have a reason to continue relationships, they do.
(
http://www.geocities.com/lifeexplore)
I know it seems like a lot of information, but maybe from this you can see what's going on in his mind. Hope that helps.
And from what I've seen... they'll go out of their way to do practical things for you. My dad is an INTP, and he shows his love by cooking, mostly. It's not gourmet or anything, but it's a practical need.