Alright, I guess it's time to share.
I've always had stagefright. But, I've found it easier to surpress when I'm actually unaware of the audience, oddly enough. I remember having to perform (I play the flute) for my grand jury exam when I was 11, in a big empty concert hall with the judges at the very end of the room. I had been playing these pieces for weeks (my music teacher made sure of that) and I was sooooooo bored of them, that I hardly practised at all anymore at home. Just before I had to go on stage, I played all through them just one more time and felt a bit nervous. Once on stage however, the light blinded me, making it impossible to see the room, and, I had to focus on the pianist who was to support my music. I also automatically focussed on the music sheets, and pretty much forgot where I was. As a result, I blew them away (my music teacher was utterly annoyed with that as he knew I hadn't been preparing in the way I should've according to him).
Compare this however to my exam for singing and well...it was a disaster.
Again a grand jury, but this time in a normal room, with them just sitting at a desk. We were required to bring three pieces, 2 of which we were allowed to prepare ( I had to sing 'Carmen' of all things!). I practised for weeks, as I very much enjoy singing, it relaxes me. The third one we were to study while the person before us was taking their exam. I was incapable of concentrating, as I was *so* nervous. Hence, I was unable to learn the third, simple piece. At all. Full mental block. I came into the room and my voice trembled, I no longer had control (and my god, can it be shrill when yo udon't have control). I sounded like a cat in pain, and I knew it. I could hear every wrong tone my voice hit, with absolutely no control. I even forgot how to breathe or just swallow, something that comes so naturally. And of course the 'performance' of third piece was the perfect ending to catastrophic exam. My music teacher, who loved my voice (to the point where you got a bit paranoid about it), asked me afterwards: *what* in gods name happened???? I was unable to reply as I was still trembling. These days, even in an empty karaokebar, with only the dj present and the staff, and the dj singing along with me, I still am not able to control my voice and the sweat is gushing from my back.
I play flute too!
I'm sorry to hear about your bad experiences.. and like others in this discussion have said, it does get better with practise. I personally have performed a flute solo to the same group of people (my Music class) 4 times this year, and each time I get more and more confident, as it becomes more familiar. We'll see how I go with my exam and then my final moderation, both coming up in a month!
I love singing..but only to myself. I don't consider myself nearly good enough to perform before an audience. And this applies to giving speeches, making presentations, singing, dancing, performing in every way. I consider it ridiculous to ask for people's time and concentration when what I have to present is not up to standard, imo. It is only when I am able to forget that there is an audience (like when a conversation automatically turns into a show, i don't care about being at the center of it as it feels like a joined effort, or like when i can concentrate on the craft I'm performing and am not confronted with the fact that there is in fact an audience), that I can actually perform at my very best as the pressure is just taking off my shoulders.
That attitude's a recipe for success if I ever saw one!
If people had paid a significant amount of money to see you, if you were a member of a symphony orchestra, a world famous soloist, a professional, then that's when you might be expected to be pretty bloody good. If they weren't bloody good, they wouldn't have gotten into the orchestra/ be world famous, so they don't have much to fear! If you're not a professional, then I'm pretty sure people won't get angry at you for your imperfections. But like toonia said, starting off in a fairly low pressure situation, then gradually working your way up as you gain confidence, is good.
I suspect that you're not that bad (your teacher loved your voice, right?), but everyone always has room for improvement. You think you're not good enough? Work on it more! But there comes a point where you have to draw the line between whether it's your talent, or self esteem that's lacking.
Also, try and learn not to be so afraid of stuffing up. We are human, and even the professionals do it (they are great at covering it up though). It's all a learning experience after all- something to improve on in the future. NOT THE BE ALL AND END ALL OF EVERYTHING!! And once you have experienced it all, the nerves, the really bad stuff ups, etc, and over a long period of time and with lots of practise learned to overcome it, then you'll be all the more proud of your achievements and confident in yourself! yay!
Now here's what I personally enjoy about performing (what you asked for in the OP!)
-Vanity boost. Showing everyone how great I am. "Wow, she's a really good flute player/actor", the audience will say. Yes, I do have confidence in my talents! - and in my capacity to become even more talented as time goes on!
-Share something important to me with loved ones. For a play I recently did, I talked about it to my family and friends nonstop for months. The performance night was their chance to see what I had been blabbing on about all this time! And hopefully be impressed.
-For acting in particular- the thrill of the audience's presence. When the teacher comes behind stage and tells you the room is packed. When you go onstage with the lights on you and feel them there. And enter a weird trance like state and immerse yourself in what your doing. And the jump-up-and-downy adrenaline before and after.
That will do for now- this has been a long post.