syorro
New member
- Joined
- Apr 1, 2015
- Messages
- 18
I know you're most likely not psychologist or anything of the sorts, but there's this problem in my...well triangle of friends. It's between an ENFP, an INFP, and an ENFJ. The thing is that the INFP sometimes has this like outbreak and feels so negative that no matter what we do, the INFP just won't budge. Eventually the ENFJ just explodes and decides to stop wasting his time with him for the moment. Last time, the ENFJ said a series of things that were true, but to any outsider it would seem like bullying towards the INFP. I seem to always be in the middle without being of much help since I'd rather not take sides nor make anyone feel cornered or left out. Please don't misunderstand though. All the ENFJ wants is to help the INFP as always, but the INFP always misinterprets out actions as animosity and goes into his depressed mode again, seeking for attention. Basically, he tends to be self-centered. The INFP also tends to think and say that their type is the most idealistic and that no one else can be as idealistic as them, possibly as a way to feel unique. The INFP seems to reject whatever advice is given to him. Also, he tends to compare his life to the ENFJ, also envying him entirely. The ENFJ really doesn't make sense of this since his life is all but unicorns and rainbows. What the INFP seems to not understand is that the ENFJ has as low self-esteem issues as him, just that he doesn't show it to the world as much. Another problem is that the ENFJ and I keep getting a feeling of inferiority since the INFP gets carried away whenever he's good at something. By that I mean that he sees no evil in shoving it in our faces if he's better at math or any other thing. The INFP seems to always find a way to feel superior, and if not, at least seem to be. I (ENFP) always end up cheering him up and dismiss the problem, causing the INFP to feel supported by me and then he sees the ENFJ as the bad guy. The problem is that the ENFJ has lived like that all his life, trying to help others, but they still see his as the bad guy. The ENFJ can feel overwhelmed because they are tired of the constant misinterpretation of his actions. To the ENFJ, it sometimes feels like nothing is worth the trouble and that not caring about people anymore is the right choice. Even with these thoughts, the ENFJ can't bring itself to do it. The ENFJ's self-esteem seems to get worse with each passing day. A major problem about this, in addition to the rest, is that the INFP just uses the same method I am using to find a solution, mbti, to justify their actions as if nothing could be done. The ENFJ is pretty much tired of this loop. It's becoming difficult for the ENFJ maintain control of the temper. His dark side comes most when it has to do with this INFP, just this one. Even with all this, the INFP seems to be oblivious to how we feel or of his actions, even when I have told him before. This situation is really affecting our friendship. Do any of you have advice on the matter?