valaki
New member
- Joined
- Jan 1, 2014
- Messages
- 940
- MBTI Type
- SeNi
- Enneagram
- 8+7
- Instinctual Variant
- sx/sp
they usually aren't yes no questions. They're usually people coming up to me and starting regular conversations and then it eventually turns into asking me for favors and calling me daily, and saying "please don't call me anymore" results in some kind of absolute move on their part to never speak to me again... which, perhaps is a good thing. Hmm...
Did you try just saying "sorry I don't have time right now?"
This "please don't call me anymore" does sound like you're asking the person to never speak to you again.
It comes in other ways as well. I listen to my family and advice people give me but frankly a lot of their advice isn't relevant. But they get mad when I don't take their advice and tell me I need to listen to them more and be more humble and blah blah blah... The hardest part is figuring out what is actually my fault and what is theirs, as I want to be objective through the whole situation.
Oh I've had that problem with people getting pissed off when I wasn't taking their advice Well if they get mad, it's their problem. I wouldn't worry about trying to figure out whose fault it is. It's your right to not take whatever piece of advice. Especially if it was unsolicited advice. But even if you asked for it, you're not obliged to follow it. If they don't understand that, again their problem.
That doesn't mean of course that the advice was really not that relevant but you still have the right to refuse to listen. With good or bad consequences, of course. It doesn't really matter in that sense if you are okay with taking bad consequences and learning from that instead .
It's impossible to be fully objective, btw. Only thing you can do is stay open and learn as much as you can, again note I'm not talking about any kind of totally perfect approach.