Eiddy
Pronounced eye-ee-dee
- Joined
- Apr 20, 2009
- Messages
- 757
- MBTI Type
- DEAD
- Enneagram
- 1w2
Well I have noticed something lately, as far as S and N go on personality types. I am Isfj and my mom is Infj. I could never quite communicate with her. She tells me things, but I am never quite clear as to what. Other than what she is DOing, never what she is FEELing.
My aunt (her sister) on the other hand, not only tells me what she is feeling, but gives me a full rundown on the whole family, in such details that I feel that I haven't missed out on anything. For instance, the family had a huge reunion in some small city in Colorado, about 250 members of the family showed up. I should have seen it, they held it in a local rented hall, and not at someone's house; her grandmother (father's side) is in a nursing home over there and can't travel long distances so they had to have it near her. Someone brought the book for the family tree and they found out some details on their great grandparents and did we know that we came from such and such a place, back around 200 years ago.. etc....
My mom's details, yeah the family is having a reunion, I didn't go. There isn't much to say. Your brother and father are going fishing, but it looks like it's going to rain. The computer is so slow. (I have heard this about a hundred times.)
Now if I want to get her talking, ask how to make something. If I ask how she is doing; she will tell me about her Dr's visit, but never what she really thinks of it, or how she feels about what he has told to her. Forget what they have discussed if anything at all.
For the longest time I have held it against her that she never really talked to me and I became quite angry, (this was a few years ago.) So I didn't want to talk to her -lasted only a few weeks- since it seemed to be of no use. She never really had anything to say, I wanted deeper conversations and she seemed only to skim subjects.
Had I known at that time it was our different communication styles, I wouldn't have expected this type of communication from her.
I would like more information on communication styles and how to break down this barrier in communication, any thoughts or opinions are welcomed as long as it is not negative useless bashing without purpose.
My aunt (her sister) on the other hand, not only tells me what she is feeling, but gives me a full rundown on the whole family, in such details that I feel that I haven't missed out on anything. For instance, the family had a huge reunion in some small city in Colorado, about 250 members of the family showed up. I should have seen it, they held it in a local rented hall, and not at someone's house; her grandmother (father's side) is in a nursing home over there and can't travel long distances so they had to have it near her. Someone brought the book for the family tree and they found out some details on their great grandparents and did we know that we came from such and such a place, back around 200 years ago.. etc....
My mom's details, yeah the family is having a reunion, I didn't go. There isn't much to say. Your brother and father are going fishing, but it looks like it's going to rain. The computer is so slow. (I have heard this about a hundred times.)
Now if I want to get her talking, ask how to make something. If I ask how she is doing; she will tell me about her Dr's visit, but never what she really thinks of it, or how she feels about what he has told to her. Forget what they have discussed if anything at all.
For the longest time I have held it against her that she never really talked to me and I became quite angry, (this was a few years ago.) So I didn't want to talk to her -lasted only a few weeks- since it seemed to be of no use. She never really had anything to say, I wanted deeper conversations and she seemed only to skim subjects.
Had I known at that time it was our different communication styles, I wouldn't have expected this type of communication from her.
I would like more information on communication styles and how to break down this barrier in communication, any thoughts or opinions are welcomed as long as it is not negative useless bashing without purpose.