Cypocalypse
New member
- Joined
- Jan 26, 2008
- Messages
- 252
- MBTI Type
- eNtP
- Enneagram
- 4w5/
Well, this is basically an INTP guy here, and I don't wanna turn this thread into another INTP guy loves ENFX thread, so I'd change things a bit.
In reality, I'm not really a hardcore INTP and over the years, I've learned to tone down my Ti, especially in social situations, and try to explore my other cognitive processes I perceive to be strong, i.e., my Ne and Fi, so these days, I'm more like xNxP.
I'm in a good relationship with my ISFJ girlfriend.
Something interests me with a certain girl pal that I have. Recently, she just told me that she's an ENFJ. She took a certain MBTI test of some sort, but she's not interested enough with MBTI principles as a whole so she didn't take it seriously.
For the longest time, I thought she's a blossoming ENFP in her early 20s (I'm 27, BTW). Most ENFPs I know are highly spiritual folks that are much older than me so, and with that age discrepancy, I can't possibly say for certain how a young ENFPs in her 20s would behave based on what I can deduce from the older folks that I know.
Anyway, it turns out she's an ENFJ after-all so I guess I was a bit off with my judgment, though not by much.
Sad to say, the archetypal ENFJs stated on the web (Obama for example) are too old for me to make a comparison with this friend. Archetype may be the same, but age do certainly create variations in personality and outlook.
_________________
The reason why I fancy this ENFJ girl so much is that, whatever is lacking in my INTP-ISFJ relationship, this girl has everything to fill up the void. Not that I'm necessarily implying that she'd make a better girlfriend or what. She's like...the other side of the coin.
She's one of my closest friends. There are occasional instances of mild flirting, nothing of which I'd expect later to get overblown. First of all, cheating isn't that much of an NTP thing. Also, I don't think I'm capable of it. Lastly, the ENFJ girl (like most NFs) value long-term relationships.
There's one very apparent side of her personality, and I like ENFJs here to share their views on this.
She's a very attractive extroverted woman, and she's easily able to project an SF mask of some sort.
Exterior-wise, she looks very SF. Behavior-wise, she's very SF. For quite some time, I was wondering if my senses are fooling me, that she's probably not a strong intuitive as I initially thought.
But knowing NFs, you guys have subtle ways of connecting to NTPs that we guys easily pick up (kinda like unwritten cues). This girl just does that to me.
However, when I try to make a conversation with her on a prolonged intuitive level, she just brings out this SF wall, and make the conversation more shallow than what she's capable of interacting with.
My theory is this. Any prolonged serious, deep conversation would trigger lonely thoughts from her. Based on my observations, she really really gets easily affected by what others say to to her. Probably among the worst case among FEELERS that I know, so as a coping mechanism, she turns the nature of the conversation something more SF in structure, so that nothing gets probed.
As an NTP though, SF style conversation isn't my forte, and I would wanna ask the ENFJs here if I can have a workaround on this one. What can I do? I noticed that I have a better success rate if we're conversing one on one. But on a group, I might as well forget it.
Her extroverted personality is stronger than mine, and more often, she gets to have a say on what mood the conversation would have.
Not that I'm saying that she no longer tries to connect with me using her intuitive side. Sometimes, she does. Like a call for help of some sort. The moment I want to explore things further is the time her SF masks inevitably kicks in.
In reality, I'm not really a hardcore INTP and over the years, I've learned to tone down my Ti, especially in social situations, and try to explore my other cognitive processes I perceive to be strong, i.e., my Ne and Fi, so these days, I'm more like xNxP.
I'm in a good relationship with my ISFJ girlfriend.
Something interests me with a certain girl pal that I have. Recently, she just told me that she's an ENFJ. She took a certain MBTI test of some sort, but she's not interested enough with MBTI principles as a whole so she didn't take it seriously.
For the longest time, I thought she's a blossoming ENFP in her early 20s (I'm 27, BTW). Most ENFPs I know are highly spiritual folks that are much older than me so, and with that age discrepancy, I can't possibly say for certain how a young ENFPs in her 20s would behave based on what I can deduce from the older folks that I know.
Anyway, it turns out she's an ENFJ after-all so I guess I was a bit off with my judgment, though not by much.
Sad to say, the archetypal ENFJs stated on the web (Obama for example) are too old for me to make a comparison with this friend. Archetype may be the same, but age do certainly create variations in personality and outlook.
_________________
The reason why I fancy this ENFJ girl so much is that, whatever is lacking in my INTP-ISFJ relationship, this girl has everything to fill up the void. Not that I'm necessarily implying that she'd make a better girlfriend or what. She's like...the other side of the coin.
She's one of my closest friends. There are occasional instances of mild flirting, nothing of which I'd expect later to get overblown. First of all, cheating isn't that much of an NTP thing. Also, I don't think I'm capable of it. Lastly, the ENFJ girl (like most NFs) value long-term relationships.
There's one very apparent side of her personality, and I like ENFJs here to share their views on this.
She's a very attractive extroverted woman, and she's easily able to project an SF mask of some sort.
Exterior-wise, she looks very SF. Behavior-wise, she's very SF. For quite some time, I was wondering if my senses are fooling me, that she's probably not a strong intuitive as I initially thought.
But knowing NFs, you guys have subtle ways of connecting to NTPs that we guys easily pick up (kinda like unwritten cues). This girl just does that to me.
However, when I try to make a conversation with her on a prolonged intuitive level, she just brings out this SF wall, and make the conversation more shallow than what she's capable of interacting with.
My theory is this. Any prolonged serious, deep conversation would trigger lonely thoughts from her. Based on my observations, she really really gets easily affected by what others say to to her. Probably among the worst case among FEELERS that I know, so as a coping mechanism, she turns the nature of the conversation something more SF in structure, so that nothing gets probed.
As an NTP though, SF style conversation isn't my forte, and I would wanna ask the ENFJs here if I can have a workaround on this one. What can I do? I noticed that I have a better success rate if we're conversing one on one. But on a group, I might as well forget it.
Her extroverted personality is stronger than mine, and more often, she gets to have a say on what mood the conversation would have.
Not that I'm saying that she no longer tries to connect with me using her intuitive side. Sometimes, she does. Like a call for help of some sort. The moment I want to explore things further is the time her SF masks inevitably kicks in.