So I am a little bit confused about a situation with a guy I am in love with. He is an INTP, we've known each other for about 9 months. Since the first day I met him I could tell that we had a lot of chemistry. We became good friends because I could really feel he "got" me... I didn't like him in a romantic way though. He always joked about us having potential chemistry and about how we were going to have an affair. I always said NO but he texted me all the time and I really liked him as a friend.
One day we kissed while we were drunk and he stayed over at my apt. But nothing happened, we cuddled and it was really awkward next morning. But we forgot about it and moved on... We were still friends but then we kissed again, and I started to like him... he stayed at my place and we cuddled all night so I began to fall for him. We hooked up and did intimate things but never sex. He was really nice and he mentioned a lot that "he would always be there for me" but that he didn't want a relationship. He said he didn't have time and that a girlfriend was really high-maintenance and he didn't want anything because he literally had no time.
I kept pressuring him to have a relationship (a casual one but that I wanted to be just with him) but he didn't want to, even though he would still want to call me every day and spend time with me. He said one time "maybe weare not the perfect couple but we care about each other right? we should just try and see how things happen" so we went on "dates" a couple of times but he still didn't want the title...
I ended up getting tired of that and told him to stop calling me and that we should avoid each other. Before that, I told him I really liked him, that I loved being with him and that I knew he felt the same... but he just kept saying he didn't feel that he wanted a relationship. So at the end we would always get in fights and I could feel he was uncomfortable with my "drama".
So we stopped talking for about a month. When I saw him again (about two weeks ago) we had a really good conversation, I could tell that he missed me and I missed him too. We started talking again and he apologized for being so mean. So we started talking again. He would text me regularly like before... and last weekend I invited him to hang out with a couple of friends.. we talked and our "friendship" was great once again. Up until saturday!
He told me to go to the same club were he was. He bought me drinks and stayed with me the whole night. We both knew something was going to happen.. and it did. We went to my apt and we had sex. For the first time... we agreed no drama and no strings attached. It was awesome... lol and he stayed over. The next day he called me to ask me how was I feeling and he has been calling me every day. Just to ask me random things.. but he is keeping touch.
I know he is terrified of the title... but I don't wanna be fooling myself when he may only be wanting sex or something. He is like my best guy friend and he cares about me... I am willing to respect his "no relationship" thing.. I don't care being his fwb as long as I know that it's just the title but that he cares about me.
I am so sorry for posting this long post but I am confused and everyone tells me "a man is a man" "he is an asshole" but I know he is not! I am not fooling myself. So that is why I want you to tell me, what does he feel?? Does he have feelings for me?? And would he be "faithful" meaning is he looking to hook up with other girls??
I just don't want to let him go when we get along so well.
One day we kissed while we were drunk and he stayed over at my apt. But nothing happened, we cuddled and it was really awkward next morning. But we forgot about it and moved on... We were still friends but then we kissed again, and I started to like him... he stayed at my place and we cuddled all night so I began to fall for him. We hooked up and did intimate things but never sex. He was really nice and he mentioned a lot that "he would always be there for me" but that he didn't want a relationship. He said he didn't have time and that a girlfriend was really high-maintenance and he didn't want anything because he literally had no time.
I kept pressuring him to have a relationship (a casual one but that I wanted to be just with him) but he didn't want to, even though he would still want to call me every day and spend time with me. He said one time "maybe weare not the perfect couple but we care about each other right? we should just try and see how things happen" so we went on "dates" a couple of times but he still didn't want the title...
I ended up getting tired of that and told him to stop calling me and that we should avoid each other. Before that, I told him I really liked him, that I loved being with him and that I knew he felt the same... but he just kept saying he didn't feel that he wanted a relationship. So at the end we would always get in fights and I could feel he was uncomfortable with my "drama".
So we stopped talking for about a month. When I saw him again (about two weeks ago) we had a really good conversation, I could tell that he missed me and I missed him too. We started talking again and he apologized for being so mean. So we started talking again. He would text me regularly like before... and last weekend I invited him to hang out with a couple of friends.. we talked and our "friendship" was great once again. Up until saturday!
He told me to go to the same club were he was. He bought me drinks and stayed with me the whole night. We both knew something was going to happen.. and it did. We went to my apt and we had sex. For the first time... we agreed no drama and no strings attached. It was awesome... lol and he stayed over. The next day he called me to ask me how was I feeling and he has been calling me every day. Just to ask me random things.. but he is keeping touch.
I know he is terrified of the title... but I don't wanna be fooling myself when he may only be wanting sex or something. He is like my best guy friend and he cares about me... I am willing to respect his "no relationship" thing.. I don't care being his fwb as long as I know that it's just the title but that he cares about me.
I am so sorry for posting this long post but I am confused and everyone tells me "a man is a man" "he is an asshole" but I know he is not! I am not fooling myself. So that is why I want you to tell me, what does he feel?? Does he have feelings for me?? And would he be "faithful" meaning is he looking to hook up with other girls??
I just don't want to let him go when we get along so well.