it happens. you get tougher with age and learn to expect less. it's not a bad thing, either, if you keep a positive attitude towards life. people will hurt you and you will hurt others, but you're the one you're responsible for.
^^Well put. I dealt more with unrequited romantic interest in my younger days when I knew myself and my needs, and likelihood of compatibility with certain people, far, far less. Thus my high hopes had no basis on which to ground them, even just a little. I find that sort of romantic interest immature, fleeting, painful, and fortunately a thing of the past.. for me at least. On the occasions I faced rejection, ofc it was a hard pill to swallow. Overtly, I always gave an air of indifference/acceptance-"hey that's life. It goes on. Et cetera. Let's go ride bikes!" I hate to fall apart in front of people [especially in front of the person I'm hurt about]. I'd reach that point of indifference internally in a rather quick manner once I processed the immediate emotional responses. My initial reactions were a bitter mix of disappointment, inadequacy, and foolishness.
I never grieved the situation for too long or pined away for someone. I've always disliked feeling as though I *need* someone *that* badly. Just a rather sour-flavored feeling that makes my skin sort of crawl. It's not like they're dead. Or that we're soulmates and destiny is ruined. Maybe it's a pride thing, or maybe it's that I can't stand feeling weak. Perhaps some combination of factors.
But, we learn and grow.
I am extremely cautious about who I allow myself to trust deeply, and it takes quite some time to reach that point. During that time is when romantic feelings can emerge, and in my recent years the two only seem to go hand-in-hand. I don't deal with the surprise of rejection because I don't allow myself to jump ahead and get attached to someone without having a fair grasp and sense of proportion about my growing relationship with this person.
In the back of my mind I'm always aware that there's so much more to living life than just trying to bond with people. Nice as it is when it happens, but it's not my definitive reason for existing. I suppose that's always helpful.