kiddykat
movin melodies
- Joined
- Jul 27, 2008
- Messages
- 1,111
- MBTI Type
- ENFP
- Enneagram
- 4, 7
Totally agreed. Describes what I went through with a "T."theory:
i've noticed certain patterns in myself and others who have grown up in severely repressive or fucked up unstable homes. for example, a rescuing "nature" that i rationally repress because i know it will get me nowhere, i recognize attraction to certain individuals who will not be ultimately beneficial to my sanity or emotions, and i analyze it, compartmentalize it, and move on (although the process is not easy, it has gotten easier). i think that growing up in a family where you have to repress your emotions and thoughts and constantly be on your toes / walking on eggshells / protective causes a disposition certain mbti types (ixfj's, for example), emotionally and in ways of processing information. it may cause a heightened yearning for understanding, for intimacy, love, or a loss of identity or an over-identification with unhealthy individuals/sadness/pain/loss, a need for security, and unhealthy boundaries, etc. regardless of whether this applies to you, come and share any insights or struggles you may have.
I think most of us don't come from perfect families. I mean, Brady Bunch was a show. I think perhaps? Less than 25% of the population can say they grew up in such a household. Even if they did, kuddos to them? Besides, I think what I endured (mom's exbf was violent/sociopathic), made me a stronger person in some ways?
I think when we endure pain and we make it through.. it adds more depth to our character if we actually *learn* from our experiences, to change for the better so we can contribute as individuals to make a difference for people in our everyday lives? Simple acts of kindness? Not over-the-top gushy, simple things? IDK.. TBH- I think our imperfect past is beauty in the making..