[INFJ] Do you relate to this? (General portrayal of INFJ)

[Jellyfish1234]

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Okay, let me try to explain it as best I can:

It was very "A + B = C" to me. You were giving very specific examples, which my brain picked up on immediately and was like "nah, we don't need to read this," because I guess I'm more interested in abstract concepts. It was concrete, not abstract. Or so I assume because I still haven't read it all, hahaha.

I do NOT think that all INFJs are like this though. I legitimately have ADHD and get very bored with finer details. I honestly don't really understand it myself, so hopefully I explained it okay???

Hmm, I think I understand. So if my description was more general, like saying, "INFJ will use insights to benefit others", rather than "The INFJ will use their ability to sense the underlying causes of events and behaviour coupled with their knack for observing behavioural patterns of others to gain analytical insights into people (Ni) - why they said what they said, what they are thinking, what they want, who they are, how they are feeling. Most of these insights are removed from judgement or emotion - it is a rather cold observational activity; "You are doing this because of this." rather than, "You are doing this because of this, and I dislike that." (Ni + Ti) The feeling/judgement side to the INFJ comes later, when the INFJ decides to use their information on somebody to DO something - usually, to care for them and to 'fix' them (Fe). If a person seems upset to the INFJ, who would sense this by understanding the usual behavioural patterns of the person or of people in the population in general, the INFJ may use the insights gained on that person to go about helping them to cheer up in a way that suits the individual in distress best.", you'd find it more interesting to read?

And do you think it would have been easier to relate to if it was like that?

If so, that's interesting, because I usually get a bit irritated when descriptions are general, because I feel like anyone could interpret them in any way because people see things/think about things differently, so I like to make sure everything is very clear and specific so I can understand whether I truly relate to it or not. Maybe that's a hint at us being different types.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

No, I meant you lost my attention when you started talking about the two students because it wasn't as abstract as the first half of your post. Basically, the first half of your post read as an INFJ wrote it, the second half lost my attention because it was almost written in a different "voice" or thinking style.

But seriously, don't listen to me because my mind is weird and nearly impossible for me to explain. And I'm confident that my type is INFJ, mind you... some tests have claimed that I am INFP, but as I understand it, their functions are completely opposite and when it boils down to it, introverted intuition fits me best.

 

[Starry]

How do they do it in an unhealthy way? "Fix" as in try to change people, not make them happy? Or am I misunderstanding?

And when you say it seems like a general SFJ description, is that you saying it's inaccurate for INFJ and more accurate for ISFJ, or are you just pointing out it feels more like a stereotypical ISFJ description because of the practical basis, and not saying it sounds like actual ISFJ?

I should have been more straightforward by saying that I am comfortable sharing *what* I think/see...but kinda feel wrong about assigning my own *why* to another type's experience/behavior. In other words, my intention in posting was merely to say "this is what I think/see" and then like [MENTION=31348]RareBird[/MENTION] did...the INFJs would agree, disagree, expand on my observation because only you guys truly know the why of it...

 

[Forever]

It's probably because I've been through a lot in life and can relate to other people's struggles. I mostly just want everyone to feel loved and appreciated and not fatally flawed, but I have no problem identifying these "flaws" in others.

I have a feeling that I'm going to be chronically over-sharing here :/ Sorry if my personal tangent was off-topic.

That sounds more like Fi tbh

 

[Jellyfish1234]

No, I meant you lost my attention when you started talking about the two students because it wasn't as abstract as the first half of your post. Basically, the first half of your post read as an INFJ wrote it, the second half lost my attention because it was almost written in a different "voice" or thinking style.

But seriously, don't listen to me because my mind is weird and nearly impossible for me to explain. And I'm confident that my type is INFJ, mind you... some tests have claimed that I am INFP, but as I understand it, their functions are completely opposite and when it boils down to it, introverted intuition fits me best.

Oh okay. Yeah, the second half was supposed to be a concrete example paragraph to anchor my point just in case anyone was interpreting what I was saying incorrectly. I usually find I benefit a lot when descriptions offer concrete examples, because that's usually when I find out that I was actually interpreting what they were trying to say completely wrong and the example helps me to get a clearer idea of what exactly they are trying to convey. Actually, reading some posts on forums like this has that effect - I can read something that someone says about how they process information and I'll imagine it in a certain way, for example they might say they "check for consistency with previous ideas", and I might imagine them thinking about some philosophical idea and checking this idea with other ideas they've had in the past, and then they'll give an example like "for example, I read my handbook to check I'm oiling my motorcycle correctly", and I'll realize I'm completely wrong about what they were saying haha.

And yeah, I think it's pretty common for INFJ to mistype as INFP on some tests.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

. Maybe that's a hint at us being different types.

Also, I took the Enneagram last night and it classed me as a 6 as well. Honestly, I wasn't super happy with that so I decided I'm going to take it another time when I'm a little less stressed out and more optimistic and see if that changes the outcome.

 

[Jellyfish1234]

I should have been more straightforward by saying that I am comfortable sharing *what* I think/see...but kinda feel wrong about assigning my own *why* to another type's experience/behavior. In other words, my intention in posting was merely to say "this is what I think/see" and then like [MENTION=31348]RareBird[/MENTION] did...the INFJs would agree, disagree, expand on my observation because only you guys truly know the why of it...

Oh okay, thank you.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

That sounds more like Fi tbh

Can you explain further? I have tested as INFJ for years, but I'm open to your interpretation as I'm only recently beginning to explore this deeper.

 

[Jellyfish1234]

And I'm confident that my type is INFJ, mind you... some tests have claimed that I am INFP, but as I understand it, their functions are completely opposite and when it boils down to it, introverted intuition fits me best.

Oh I just realized why you might have said this - when I said maybe it was a clue we were different types, I wasn't saying I thought you weren't INFJ, I was saying maybe I'm ISFJ haha. Sorry if that wasn't clear.

 

[Starry]

That sounds more like Fi tbh

How would Fe sound differently?

 

[Peter Deadpan]

Yeah, that would make sense to me actually because it seems you take in a lot of information from your surroundings. Is that an accurate statement?

I really don't take in or even notice much about my surroundings.

 

[Jellyfish1234]

Yeah, that would make sense to me actually because it seems you take in a lot of information from your surroundings. Is that an accurate statement?

I really don't take in or even notice much about my surroundings.

Actually no, I'm very much stuck in my head and unobservant of my surroundings, but I do notice things when it comes to people - I seem to be able to pick up on when people are unhappy when most others don't seem to notice. I can notice changes in people's tones of voice or behavior. But when it comes to taking in sensory information in my surroundings, I'm terrible. But I don't think that necessarily makes me an intuitive - just a heavy Pi dom. I struggle deciding on INFJ vs ISFJ. I relate more to INFJ qualities yet there are certain (what appear to be) universal INFJ traits that I don't relate to, and I have anxiety problems and worry about things a lot so I wonder whether that is a sign of inferior Ne, but when I learn more about what inferior Ne is all about, I find I'm probably not inferior Ne (but unsure), and I certainly don't relate to most (but not all) Si dom qualities. But I don't relate to Ni dom as much as I probably should to feel comfortable typing as INFJ. Yet I'm very confident I'm one of the two haha.

Anyway, thank you for your posts!

 

[Forever]

How would Fe sound differently?

Well Fe is more of real time empathizing. I see the pain, I feel the pain, let me find a way where your feelings and needs can be met. It's more practical whereas Fi is more of like I've been there, I can understand what you've been through. Just let it out.

 

[Forever]

Can you explain further? I have tested as INFJ for years, but I'm open to your interpretation as I'm only recently beginning to explore this deeper.

Fi recreates the experience due to his or her own experience. You relate to others because you've been in similar pain. If you see an Fi dom counselor usually their methods are like very hands off approach. They listen understand and totally validate your experience and ask what can you do?

Where as an Fe counselor wants to take more action and steps for you to grow. Make sense?

 

[Jellyfish1234]

[MENTION=19719]Forever[/MENTION], how do you feel about the portrayal, if you don't mind me picking you out haha?

 

[Forever]

[MENTION=19719]Forever[/MENTION], how do you feel about the portrayal, if you don't mind me picking you out haha?

It sounds like anyone can relate to that description. I'm sorry just not a good profile.

 

[Jellyfish1234]

It sounds like anyone can relate to that description. I'm sorry just not a good profile.

No it's okay, don't be sorry, thank you for the feedback. How would you tailor it to fit INFJ specifically? And since you say anyone can relate, are my definitions of the functions in my portrayal incorrect?

 

[Peter Deadpan]

This is all giving me a headache. I dunno how you guys can think/talk about this stuff so much without spiraling into confusion.

All I really know about myself is that I am CONSTANTLY analyzing other people and myself. I am WAY stuck in my head and my sensing abilities are basically zilch. I have a horrible memory when it comes to details, but I have a rich knowledge of human behavior, pain, and suffering. I like to figure out why people do what they do and I'm good at reading between the lines. I guess I'm usually comparing nuances in other people to myself or other people I have known along the way. I don't tend to care about helping everyone around me, but I also haven't been in a good place for a long time, so I think it's easy for me to fall into a selfish or tunnel-visioned place of existence. If I'm being honest with myself, sometimes when I offer help for others or ask how they're doing, I do it because I know it's the right, socially acceptable thing to do. Conversely, I have a strong desire to help other people professionally, but preferably on a broader scale (think writing a self-help book or bringing awareness to a cause meant to help a group of people as opposed to being a nurse, therapist, or even a parent). I have lost friends in the past for becoming too introverted/distant/preoccupied with my own life. With that said, when in a relationship, I put an immense amount of effort into connecting with and making my partner happy. I want nothing more than to find a lover who can finally feel safe and real and raw with me and vice versa. I would be perfectly happy in an almost codependent relationship, but inevitably, that scenario tends to breed boredom, frustration, and cabin fever. I have an appetite for adventure that is completely unfed because I am SO introverted that I struggle to break out of my boring daily routine. "Going out" usually consists of shopping by myself or maybe hanging out with one friend in a laid back environment.

Does this sound like an INFJ or more like an INFP or something else entirely? Bear in mind that I have anxiety and have also developed depression as of late due to psychological trauma.

Maybe I'm delving too far into "therapy land," but I think it's important to mention the above issues because they could affect the dominance of my functions.

Side note: Thanks for putting up with my ever-changing tangents of thought. If there is a type that tends to bring the subject back to themselves, it's me, lol.

 

[Forever]

Here's a question for [MENTION=31348]RareBird[/MENTION] and [MENTION=28184]Jellyfish1234[/MENTION]

If you found your true type, what would you do with it?

 

[Peter Deadpan]

I guess I would use it as a tool for better understanding myself. That's actually a good question because it probably makes little difference whether or not I know my type accurately.
I'm trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. I have no job satisfaction and I'm wondering what I should shift my focus to.