User Tag List

123 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 82

  1. #1
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Posts
    4

    Default INTJ Women - How to get to them?

    Not sure if there's a thread started on this.

    But here goes. Lately I've developed some feelings for an INTJ girl. She's a high achieving perfectionist, striving for her law degree, playing in golf tournaments worldwidel, getting top grades, etc. Is there anything I can do besides beating her in everything that she cares about?

  2. #2
    no clinkz 'til brooklyn Nocapszy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Posts
    4,516

    Default

    Beating her might not be the best... I mean, yeah that's a good strategy.

    But for clarity when you say "beating her in everything she cares about" do you mean that you're going to try to learn all these things -- pro-golf, law, and grades -- to where you can consistently one up her?
    we fukin won boys

  3. #3
    Kickin' Ass since 1984 GargoylesLegacy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ESTP
    Enneagram
    8w9
    Socionics
    esTp
    Posts
    1,400

    Default

    Wasn't there already a thread like this? "INTJs and affection" or that other one. Hm, not sure anymore how it is called.
    Anyways.

    We INTJs are impressed by honesty and directness. We like smart people; we like if we can have time for ourselves (so if you are a stalker, you should forget about it); we...oh wait. I just saw you are an INTP. INTJs and INTPs are like family anyways. They are much alike. INTJs are just a little more organized (the J makes us); INTPs a little more open and chaotic (the P).

    So, to get to an INTJ you should make sure you can leave them the space they need; you should be able to finish the stuff you start (no procrastination); you should be able to keep stuff clean / organized; try to be decisive; respect their events, routines and habits. If you can do this, it's all good. Try to impress her with knowledge and honesty. Then it could most likely work out.
    Rule #1: Driver picks the music. Shotgun shuts his cakehole.

    Again, Demons I get, but people are just crazy.

    ESTP? o.O

  4. #4
    Content. Content? DigitalMethod's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Posts
    970

    Default

    Generally speaking:
    Most INTJs have a desire to talk about feelings, with the people they are close to.
    But most INTPs don't find that pleasurable.
    "The life of the individual has meaning only insofar as it aids in making the life of every living thing nobler and more beautiful."
    - Albert Einstein

  5. #5
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    xxxx
    Posts
    735

    Default

    You don't have to beat her, I'm sure she'll be happy to beat you.

    Ok I'll be serious, what are you passionate about? Show her that part of you. You don't have to be good at the same things she is, impress her with what you are good at instead. INTPs usually have lots of random knowledge crammed in their heads, let her in there.

    Ignore the poster before me, INTJs do NOT like to talk about feelings.

  6. #6
    Senior Member ed111's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Posts
    426

    Default

    As a conquerer of INTJ women I feel that I am in a good position to give you some advice!

    - pretend you're an INTJ;
    - do not make her late for appointments etc. This might be a problem for you as an INTP. I recommend buying a pda and using it;
    - buy her flowers. INTJ women, like all women like some romance. Although she may seem like a cold blooded bitch, she'll melt if you make bold romantic gestures;
    - use correct spelling and grammar;
    - don't argue the point on technicalities: this might prove to be annoying;
    - ensure your pad is neat and tidy: she probably can't abide a mess.

    I hope some of these ideas help you. Good luck!

  7. #7
    Senior Member Uytuun's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    MBTI
    nnnn
    Posts
    1,633

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by GargoylesLegacy View Post
    So, to get to an INTJ you should make sure you can leave them the space they need; you should be able to finish the stuff you start (no procrastination); you should be able to keep stuff clean / organized; try to be decisive; respect their events, routines and habits. If you can do this, it's all good. Try to impress her with knowledge and honesty. Then it could most likely work out.
    This sounds a bit scary. Stay yourself. You might want to take into account that we're not very spontaneous etc., but please don't just try to be like her (both from a pragmatic point of view: you'll probably fail, INTJs enjoy confidence in who you are and if you have to change for her, you're probably not the best match and from an ethical point of view). From what I've heard a lot of INTJs procrastinate and are chaotic in their living spaces - it depends on the person.

    Quote Originally Posted by DigitalMethod View Post
    Generally speaking:
    Most INTJs have a desire to talk about feelings, with the people they are close to.
    But most INTPs don't find that pleasurable.
    Hmmm, I don't know about that one, really. Maybe not the Fi way, but they do talk about it. And I agree with the owl, talking about feelings is always difficult, especially in person.

  8. #8
    Kickin' Ass since 1984 GargoylesLegacy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ESTP
    Enneagram
    8w9
    Socionics
    esTp
    Posts
    1,400

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ed111 View Post
    - pretend you're an INTJ;
    Hm, okay so I know I can't speak for all the INTJ girls but I'd rather like somebody to be honest and "who he is" than pretending to be something he is not and me finding out in some odd, twisted way in the end.


    Quote Originally Posted by Uytuun
    This sounds a bit scary. Stay yourself.
    I didn't want to say that he should change for her. I was saying what he should be able to do. If he can't, then INTJs might not be the thing for him. That's all.
    Rule #1: Driver picks the music. Shotgun shuts his cakehole.

    Again, Demons I get, but people are just crazy.

    ESTP? o.O

  9. #9
    Senior Member ptgatsby's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    ISTP
    Posts
    4,474

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ed111 View Post
    As a conquerer of INTJ women I feel that I am in a good position to give you some advice!
    Heh, as someone who married one;
    - pretend you're an INTJ;
    Be something that intrigues them. Being an INTJ would not be the first step.

    - do not make her late for appointments etc. This might be a problem for you as an INTP. I recommend buying a pda and using it;
    Truth. Much truth. In fact, find ways to make her on time for her appointments.

    - buy her flowers. INTJ women, like all women like some romance. Although she may seem like a cold blooded bitch, she'll melt if you make bold romantic gestures;
    Romantic, maybe. Flowers? Hell no. Effort and attention are rewarded in general, but make sure it's the right thing for her.

    - use correct spelling and grammar;
    Depends, but since she is in law school....

    - don't argue the point on technicalities: this might prove to be annoying;
    - ensure your pad is neat and tidy: she probably can't abide a mess.
    Both of these fall under reasonable. Argue, but don't argue to the point of conflict. Be neat, but not ultra neat. INTJs tend to be reasonable... or at least, the ones you want to have around are


    You'll have to know a lot more about her and see what distracts her from her tasks at hand. Sounds like an over-achieving type, which means she doesn't have room in her life for you (or anyone). That's a tough thing to fight, because even if she tries, INTJs tend to... prioritize and discard distractions. You'll be there when she needs the comfort, but otherwise, she'll tend to focus on other stuff, when you'll count as a distraction.

    This works both ways though. Once you are together, she'll consider other things a distraction from you, and you'll be pretty high up on the list. That's nice too.

  10. #10
    Content. Content? DigitalMethod's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Posts
    970

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by DigitalMethod View Post
    Generally speaking:
    Most INTJs have a desire to talk about feelings, with the people they are close to.
    But most INTPs don't find that pleasurable.
    The key here is people they are close to.
    I am sure he isn't that close to her yet.
    I was just making a statement pointing out a possible future issue that might arise if they get into a relationship.

    I have to agree with what Gargoyles said.
    Don't change yourself, it will probably be picked up on, and make you less trustworthy in her eyes.
    "The life of the individual has meaning only insofar as it aids in making the life of every living thing nobler and more beautiful."
    - Albert Einstein

Similar Threads

  1. [INTJ] How to make the best use of the INTJ characteristics when looking for a girl friend
    By gandalf in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 01-01-2015, 06:52 AM
  2. Women - How To Pee Standing Up
    By Mal12345 in forum Health and Fitness
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 11-07-2014, 06:55 PM
  3. [INTJ] INTJs: how to deal with over-friendly/clingy people you just met?
    By SamCarter in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 11-20-2010, 09:13 PM
  4. [INTJ] How to pull out female INTJ out of depression
    By Immaculate Cloud in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 07-03-2010, 10:53 AM
  5. [INTJ] How to seduce an INTJ...
    By runvardh in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 267
    Last Post: 11-07-2009, 04:45 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO