I am indeed identified with being an angry person. Always been. Someone with a temper, fierce, constantly pissed off about everything that's fucked up about life. I'm currently someone who has to take out her rage against humanity by swordfighting old boxes and attacking doors with axes. And it never burns out. This world is so utterly fucked up, so cruel, and, yes, I am angry about it.
What I find most striking about this is actually, how little most others do see it. Even during the times when I would have shot someone as soon as looking at them, they don't seem to notice. I smile when I interact and speak in low tones (and I can't help this, it's just how I am) and no one has a clue. Most strangers, if they comment on my personality, note that I'm quiet, soft and polite. My family, for all they hated my outbursts, never once got the idea that I was somehow an angry young woman.
It makes me wonder sometimes, who's more right here? Am I as angry as I think, or am I as mild as they say?
When I look at myself compared to other people, though, I kind of get it. It seems like most people just get a lot more upset about things than I do. Like they can't just roll with events. They expend anger on the most unnecessary things. "This meal isn't done the way I want! LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR MANAGER!" "You're out of rye bread?? IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD! FEEL MY WRATH!!!" "You like Donald Trump? YOU SHOULD BE SHOT YOU DESPICABLE PERSON." "You were looking at me funny! I AM OPPRESSED!! I CAN'T TAKE ANYMORE OF THIS BULLSHIT!"
Does anyone know what I mean? Minor things seem to set most people off kilter, and I find they take offense and become angry and hostile for reasons I never would. When something does irritate me (which is often, and usually when things get in my way), I usually don't articulate it. I don't necessarily want to set others off, so I mind my boundaries and make efforts not to be a douche. Other people seem to have no conception of this. I feel angry but it doesn't seem to show; others get angry about stuff I never would but then fail to respond to events of more consequence.
I don't know how to answer this one. Huh. I'm not angertypical. Let's leave it at that.