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  1. #11
    Pronounced eye-ee-dee Eiddy's Avatar
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    Sounds like you had interesting experience and I am so glad to see it didn't affect your life to any degree.

    I also keep my son off of medications, since it would be the hyperactivity that would drive me crazy and he doesn't have that aspect of it. I figure it is best for him not to take them.

    I would have never known Runvardh that you faced this situation had you not said. It isn't even apparent, life just goes on as normal.. I do feel much better knowing that. Thank you
    Johari / Nohari

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  2. #12
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    I still struggle with things, but the paramilitary training was more helpful than detramental and they didn't just sit me down all the time, they had me up and moving. Structure = good, nothing to do = bad, cadets gave me something to do while keeping it structured.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

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  3. #13
    Pronounced eye-ee-dee Eiddy's Avatar
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    Hmm now that is interesting, because it is like that at home. Maybe if it were a bit more structured he would probably appreciate having things to do. Thanks
    Johari / Nohari

    Enneagram 1w2/Lifepath 1/first zodiac sign Aries/first Chinese zodiac sign RAT/first born in my siblings of 3. Did I forget to mention first?

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  4. #14
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    Things to do and put energy into just helps control it; the appreciation may not happen till he's older, though.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  5. #15
    DoubleplusUngoodNonperson
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    if the ADHD is legit, it will be necessary to narrow down which subtype of ADHD he is - inattentive, hyperactive, or combined. if hes hyperactive then yardwork or anything physical might suffice because he/she just needs to be moving about..... inattentiveness, however, is a whole different ballgame.

  6. #16
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    i've never been officially diagnosed but...

    in grade 5 i used to have oral tests in school where the teacher will ask a question and i have to orally answer it right then and there...on the spot.

    note: description below is literal, no metaphors or innuendoes used

    my parents used to help me study for these things and it would take me FOREVER to get the answer out of my mouth. i knew the answer, but as soon as i started speaking, i got stuck with an open mouth...once i got the first word out, it would be a lot easier to keep continuing...

    this only happened when studying at home with my parents and never on the actual tests when teachers asked me the question

    something to do with comfort zone and being too comfortable to care at home? while at school, the teacher is an authority figure...and maybe i cared because im Exxx, maybe your son is Ixxx and couldn't care less about anything outside his own head?

    i also had minor OCD that went away with time (or i willed it away...i dunno) but regardless gave my parents a hell of a time dealing with my 'issues'

  7. #17
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nozflubber View Post
    if the ADHD is legit, it will be necessary to narrow down which subtype of ADHD he is - inattentive, hyperactive, or combined. if hes hyperactive then yardwork or anything physical might suffice because he/she just needs to be moving about..... inattentiveness, however, is a whole different ballgame.
    I'm a bit of both, though the inattentive might be more type related. I think the boy who is the topic of the discussion is ADD not ADHD.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  8. #18
    Senior Member run's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eiddy View Post
    That's what I was thinking maybe a restaurant.
    I haven't read the whole long thread, but that's what I was thinking. I have ADHD and the multitasking helps. Keep in mind though, ADD isn't fully explained, just a theory. One INTP can be much different from the one sitting next to him. I have the low cortisol ADD. Some people have low dopamine, some other causes.

  9. #19
    Pronounced eye-ee-dee Eiddy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nozflubber View Post
    if the ADHD is legit, it will be necessary to narrow down which subtype of ADHD he is - inattentive, hyperactive, or combined. if hes hyperactive then yardwork or anything physical might suffice because he/she just needs to be moving about..... inattentiveness, however, is a whole different ballgame.
    Yeah, he doesn't have ADHD although they say this is the term given for it, but he is without the hyperactivity.

    Quote Originally Posted by thisGuy View Post
    i've never been officially diagnosed but...

    in grade 5 i used to have oral tests in school where the teacher will ask a question and i have to orally answer it right then and there...on the spot.

    note: description below is literal, no metaphors or innuendoes used

    my parents used to help me study for these things and it would take me FOREVER to get the answer out of my mouth. i knew the answer, but as soon as i started speaking, i got stuck with an open mouth...once i got the first word out, it would be a lot easier to keep continuing...

    this only happened when studying at home with my parents and never on the actual tests when teachers asked me the question

    something to do with comfort zone and being too comfortable to care at home? while at school, the teacher is an authority figure...and maybe i cared because im Exxx, maybe your son is Ixxx and couldn't care less about anything outside his own head?

    i also had minor OCD that went away with time (or i willed it away...i dunno) but regardless gave my parents a hell of a time dealing with my 'issues'
    Exactly, this is what happens to him whenever he is questioned in a way where he might be in trouble or asked a question like how much was this product or the other product. He will stand there looking at us, like he is in shock and doesn't reply. He might shake his head with a what type of nod, but there isn't any reply. I find it seems to be a key, to get whoever is asking a question, to become angry. I try to remind myself and my husband it is because of his condition, not because he is being defiant in not answering.

    Quote Originally Posted by runvardh View Post
    I'm a bit of both, though the inattentive might be more type related. I think the boy who is the topic of the discussion is ADD not ADHD.
    He is able to be super-focused when he is playing a video game, but watching a show or movie, well he is clicking the remote to change the channel constantly. Can't watch anything for more than a few minutes.

    Quote Originally Posted by run View Post
    I haven't read the whole long thread, but that's what I was thinking. I have ADHD and the multitasking helps. Keep in mind though, ADD isn't fully explained, just a theory. One INTP can be much different from the one sitting next to him. I have the low cortisol ADD. Some people have low dopamine, some other causes.
    Multi-tasked with written steps or just being told different things to do. I find if it has more than one or two steps he get a mental block, like anything I have just told him has disappeared into thin air. BTW glad to see you back, haven't seen you around in awhile.


    I appreciate everyone's feedback and understanding. I am glad others are able to relate and give me some tips. I guess I just have to sit down with him, devise a plan, and try to get him to work towards it. So that he will be more independent later in life.
    Johari / Nohari

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  10. #20
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    I'm 30 now and just got an ADD (ADHD-I) diagnosis a few months ago. In practise this means trouble concentrating (except in the occasions when I can get into "the zone" and hyperfocus), excessive procrastination (even for an INTP), being chronically late and forgetting appointments, bills, things etc. Finishing projects - forget about it. I also have major trouble following oral orders (written are no problem) - I tend to lose focus halfway through and keep forgetting some (or all!) of the steps. My thought process is rather chaotic and I constantly get derailed in conversations. Also writing more than a paragraph or two of truly coherent text is very hard for me (either due to losing focus or only having a vague idea of the text I've written before).

    These are all pretty common symptoms of ADD (ADHD-I). Problems you with lack of communication and basic mental calculation are (very) unlikely to be related to ADD. They could be due to a comorbid disability (dyslexia for example is a relatively common comorbid condition). It is also possible that your son has Asperger, but that's impossible to say without much more info. Sometimes the two are confused.

    As for medication (this is going to take long)... I have to say that getting the diagnosis and starting medication was the best thing I've ever done in my life. Popular descriptions of ADHD overemphasize school performance when in fact it's the problems in everyday functioning and social life that really get you down. Hyperactivity is not that much of a problem in adult life (it almost always gets less around adolescence) but impulsivity and concentration problems stay with you throughout your life. Without medication large portion of people with ADHD later develop depression or anxiety disorder (imagine your life being a mess and never getting anything finished and this continuing for years and years). Substance abuse is relatively common, partially as self medication method. I've read statistics that quote 30% of prison population having ADHD...

    The meds don't get you high (unless you do something incredibly stupid such as taking 10 x the dose or crushing and snorting them etc). I first started with Concerta (aka Methylphenidate) which is basically extended release Ritalin and then soon switched to Dexedrine (aka Dexamphetamine) that is similar to Adderall. Concerta caused unpleasant motor nervousness (tremor/jitters etc). After switching to Dexedrine I can't say I've noticed any but fleeting side effects apart from some lack of hunger.

    Dexedrine doesn't produce any kind of subjective change in my feeling and certainly no rush. I can just get things done, can concentrate on finishing my studies and have more energy for daily life and duties. I've also noticed that I now have less need to drink alcohol, meaning I don't mind sitting with an empty pint and waiting for my friends to finish their second round while before I need to have something to do and that usually meant getting a new drink as soon as the previous one was empty (see the point about substance abuse earlier).

    I've also gained new insights in understanding people and communication as this is the first time I've truly been able to concentrate on their body language and on things that are not immediately and intrinsically interesting. I think this point alone already makes it worth going on the medication - there are things in social understanding and communication that are very hard to learn once you're past your teenager years.

    Now for the job advice: Ideally he needs a job where he is good enough that he can compensate the procrastination and organization deficiencies with other qualities. A variety of tasks is a must - boredom instantly kills concentration. It's good if he has someone who can nudge him in the right direction and remind him (implicitly) of the tasks he's supposed to be doing (this does not mean micromanagement!).
    Last edited by A-J; 08-04-2009 at 05:40 PM. Reason: Forgot last paragraph

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