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What kind of people challenge you?

anticlimatic

Permabanned
Joined
Oct 17, 2013
Messages
3,299
MBTI Type
INTP
People who are intelligent and inspired, working to accomplish some kind of new and interesting goal. I enjoy piggy backing off of their intertia and helping to solve tactical issues, initially because it's just plain fun, but also because I can add the results to my empirical database in case I ever encounter something similar later.

If we are talking about "people who challenge my ability to not get disturbed," id say almost no one. Maybe brainless indignant hive-minds when they crawl up my ass in an unsolicited manner and try to covert me to one Jesus or another, but that's rare.
 

RadicalDoubt

Alongside Questionable Clarity
Joined
Jun 27, 2017
Messages
1,843
MBTI Type
TiSi
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
cough i am derailing the thread cough

Do you have the opportunity to discuss your thoughts and ideas regardless? I really enjoy putting mine out there. We learn not only from books- knowledge takes many forms, and come from many sources. I am very happy to be corrected, because it is a part of the study process, and I love studying. What better than a mentor to walk with you and straighten out your understanding? It's like an interactive book. SAID LIKE THE E5 I AM

More seriously, I do encourage you to give it a shot. Think of the things you'll learn!
**Continues to derail**

I rarely get the opportunity. I love talking about ideas, but I have a very small presence and tend to stutter and speak very quietly, so it's not always easy for me to share ideas unless the conversation speed is very "monologue oriented" or over text platforms where I'm actually given the chance to respond to things and have people respond to those thoughts (ie. I give my thoughts in a blerb, they give their thoughts in a blerb, more of a slow setting). I'm easy to talk over and I'm often treated more like a wall or therapist than a person since I lack the assertion to get my ideas across unless I'm specifically in a debate setting where I often lead a bit more or am specifically providing advise or perspective myself. When I get to speak and am in an environment with others who are interested in sharing ideas or gaining perspective rather than just providing their own, I'm generally pretty confident in the way I go about it and with what I'm saying, however I get caught in entertaining other ideas/possibilities too much and being entertained by how other people think/different perspectives which often gets me plowed over more. It's kind of a shame I'm the recluse/awful communicator since I'm more of a discussion based/auditory learner anyways.

I'm pretty open to being corrected for the most part and prefer that at least to having my opinion being affirmed. In the prior at least I'm getting something new out of the conversation and bettering my own understanding of the topic.
 

highlander

Administrator
Staff member
Joined
Dec 23, 2009
Messages
25,482
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
6w5
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I have had a hard time answering the question in the OP because I get along with a lot of pretty difficult people. The one thing I've come up with is that I do not get along with people who are controlling nitpicking types - especially if that nature is in any way directed at me. I'm a very independent person and it really rubs me the wrong way. I basically try to avoid them. There is one person I can think of work that I've known for years and I work with her when I need to but I just really kind of can't stand her. When I've had projects in the past that I could have run and I'd need to work with her, I'd just say no.
 

ceecee

Dunkin Enthusiast
Joined
Apr 22, 2008
Messages
14,916
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
8w9
Micromanagement personalities suck and I can tolerate them in a limited capacity. I won't work for one, not ever. The other is perpetual victims, regardless of the reason. Both take more energy from me than I'm willing to give anyone.
 

Coriolis

Liberator
Staff member
Joined
Apr 18, 2010
Messages
26,665
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
No, sorry I suppose what I was saying was somewhat unclear, what I specifically was referencing I bolded in your text there, specifically someone who has that feeling as they are better than others by default rather than those focused on knowledge and capability itself. As Earl Grey sort of expanded on (because I wasn't super clear in my first text perhaps) is that there is a distinct difference between confidence and self righteousness, where confidence doesn't work off an idealized image of them self by necessity and is willing to consider the possibility that they could be wrong (when it is pointed out) or consider others ability or ideas when others are also competent and self righteousness would be based off of an image of being right consistently and typically has less of a focus on the learning prospect due to being an informant or the most competent being aligned with the ego or some moral superiority.
Another way of looking at it is that self-righteousness seems based on a subjective self-valuation that may lack support, while self-confidence rests on a self-valuation that can be substantiated more objectively. That is, the self-confident person really does know what they are talking about, and can do what they say they can. Or, yet another way: self-righteousness is based in who someone is, and self-confidence in what they know or can do. I have sometimes pointed out the difference between the notion of being better than other people, and being better AT certain things than other people. The latter is just an expression of reality and not a moral judgment on other people's worth as human beings. True self-confidence is not threatened by the knowledge or abilities of others. They after all can provide valuable learning opportunities or collaboration.

cough i am derailing the thread cough
(now that I think of it, I wonder if my enthusiasm outweighing my self esteem is why I seem confident. That really is still a mystery to me)
You do come across as very enthusiastic, probably one reason you can appear extraverted at times.

And no, I don't think this is a derail, but if there is interest I can split this part of the discussion into its own thread.

**Continues to derail**

I rarely get the opportunity. I love talking about ideas, but I have a very small presence and tend to stutter and speak very quietly, so it's not always easy for me to share ideas unless the conversation speed is very "monologue oriented" or over text platforms where I'm actually given the chance to respond to things and have people respond to those thoughts (ie. I give my thoughts in a blerb, they give their thoughts in a blerb, more of a slow setting). I'm easy to talk over and I'm often treated more like a wall or therapist than a person since I lack the assertion to get my ideas across unless I'm specifically in a debate setting where I often lead a bit more or am specifically providing advise or perspective myself. When I get to speak and am in an environment with others who are interested in sharing ideas or gaining perspective rather than just providing their own, I'm generally pretty confident in the way I go about it and with what I'm saying, however I get caught in entertaining other ideas/possibilities too much and being entertained by how other people think/different perspectives which often gets me plowed over more. It's kind of a shame I'm the recluse/awful communicator since I'm more of a discussion based/auditory learner anyways.

I'm pretty open to being corrected for the most part and prefer that at least to having my opinion being affirmed. In the prior at least I'm getting something new out of the conversation and bettering my own understanding of the topic.
Well, it is just as important to tell someone where they are right as where they are wrong. Forums like this one are a good venue for sharing ideas, for just the reasons you mention. The asyncronous, text-based communication style lends itself to people who want to ponder well before replying, or tie together various other perspectives. Discord chat is a faster pace, and also provides the option of voice chat. So, you can try different methods in what I hope is a friendly setting. I at least have enjoyed reading your thoughts on a variety of topics, and appreciate your being a good sport with the Discord shenanigans. Finally, being a good communicator is something you can learn, so if that is important to you, look for tips and advice whether online or in person, and practice when you have a chance.
 

Abcdenfp

Terpsichore
Joined
May 19, 2017
Messages
1,664
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7W8
All these dumb insta people .. like instant gratification, insta service .. it's like for god sake don't you know most good things take time RELAX Karen
 

Tilt

Active member
Joined
Sep 18, 2015
Messages
2,585
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Emotionally disturbed ISTP types. I have interacted with two online who have fantasized about doing bodily harm to me or at least implied it to try to get a rise out of me. Ironically, now they both seem terrified of me because I can see through their shit... what weirdos... hahaha. Staying away from creeps on forums now.
 

Peter Deadpan

phallus impudicus
Joined
Dec 14, 2016
Messages
8,887
I don't like people who insert themselves into my life or situations that don't involve them, or people who have silent expectations of me (and then suddenly flip out when I don't meet them), or people who are noisily self-righteous. I also don't like when others interact with me in a manner that implies that they have assumed that I know less than them and need their knowledge or assistance... condescending "heroes".
 

Morpeko

Noble Wolf
Joined
Sep 20, 2017
Messages
5,297
MBTI Type
LEFV
Enneagram
461
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
People who are better than me at the things I want to, or already am, good at. I'm highly competitive and driven to prove that I am the best, so they pose the biggest threat to me.
 

Saturnal Snowqueen

LL"s Atom Bomb Baby
Joined
Jan 9, 2019
Messages
5,442
MBTI Type
FELV
Enneagram
947
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
People who are killers of fun, especially from an intellectually snobbish perspective. What are you actually accomplishing here?? Absolutely nothing. Can't see how it's good for you or the discussion at hand. Also, people who make me question my morals in casual conversation(phrases like, "Don't make excuses", You make you bed, you lie in it, "Lesson learned". But if I'm so worried about that sort of stuff, I got to have some sort of morals, right?
 
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