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Is it a personal offense for someone to question your type?

Frosty

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I usually try to keep OP posts general in order to not skew peoples responses but this time- Im going to answer this with my opinion here too.

I think it is absolutely ridiculous when people act like it is WRONG for someone to DARE question their type. This is a typology website. This is a place where we are trying to understand typology. That means constantly evaluatig and reevaluation behavior and vauses for behavior to understand patterns of type. This is not a place where you get to DEMAND that people see you as a particular type and then when people DONT- get offended and act like they are doing something wrong for questioning you.

Personally, I feel that that behavior in and of itself shows that you have a problem that you are desperatly trying to fill with validation from a typlogy system- rather than actually trying to understand yourself.

To understand typology- peoplee need to feel free to question others. To understand what IS a type- people also need to not fear being called out when they try to determine what “isnt”. If no one is allowed to question- then typology goes from a living and constantly developing understanding to something that is dead and worn by people like a badge.

Again. In my opinion- this is a typology website and Im just... it seems more and more lately this has become less about people trying to understand themselves and others- and more about forcing people to understand them as they want to be seen.

Thats my opinion- and for now, Im sticking to it.
 

prplchknz

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Yeah I'm not sure because typing someone as a sensor was a way to underhandily call someone stupid back in the day. Now sometimes this is true but i can't say it is 100% of the time.
 

Frosty

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Yeah I'm not sure because typing someone as a sensor was a way to underhandily call someone stupid back in the day. Now sometimes this is true but i can't say it is 100% of the time.

I think calling someone a type as a way to insult them is wrong. But I think if someone is willing to sit there and provide reasoning for why you DONT fit a type, serious well thought out reasoning, and then someone gets offended and that sort of thing is then seen as bullying or something- thats not right.

I havent been here super long but- things have definitely changed when it comes to this. When I joined people were openly able to question others types. It was something that just happened, and although sometimes it sucked to feel like the rug was being pulled out from under you... no one acted like it was the end of the world for them. People took in information- ALL infromation- and not just demanded the informaion that they wanted to hear.

Its only been the last year- year and a half really that ive seen this change. Seen people actually call questioning someones type-“bullying”. Its not bullying for someone to question you. Its not bullying for someone to suggest you might be wrong. You dont have to lisren to it I guess- but really- acting like its something thats some sort of intentional personal offense is limiting the understanding people are allowed to have when it comes to typology.
 

prplchknz

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I think calling someone a type as a way to insult them is wrong. But I think if someone is willing to sit there and provide reasoning for why you DONT fit a type, serious well thought out reasoning, and then someone gets offended and that sort of thing is then seen as bullying or something- thats not right.

I havent been here super long but- things have definitely changed when it comes to this. When I joined people were openly able to question others types. It was something that just happened, and although sometimes it sucked to feel like the rug was being pulled out from under you... no one acted like it was the end of the world for them. People took in information- ALL infromation- and not just demanded the informaion that they wanted to hear.

Its only been the last year- year and a half really that ive seen this change. Seen people actually call questioning someones type-“bullying”. Its not bullying for someone to question you. Its not bullying for someone to suggest you might be wrong. You dont have to lisren to it I guess- but really- acting like its something thats some sort of intentional personal offense is limiting the understanding people are allowed to have when it comes to typology.

yeah this happens a cycle, for awhile people are like you're blah blah and here's why and the other person is like ok let me reflect on that i politely disagree then other times it's like you are blah blah and the other person is WAAAHHH NO I"M NOT STOP BEING MEAN TO ME!!!! I've been guilty of both. but it comes and goes.
 

Jaguar

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Jag: I prefer vanilla ice cream over chocolate.
Betty: YOU KNOW YOU REALLY PREFER CHOCOLATE. ADMIT IT.

What did Betty accomplish other than make a few people wonder if she's a wacko?
 

Frosty

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yeah this happens a cycle, for awhile people are like you're blah blah and here's why and the other person is like ok let me reflect on that i politely disagree then other times it's like you are blah blah and the other person is WAAAHHH NO I"M NOT STOP BEING MEAN TO ME!!!! I've been guilty of both. but it comes and goes.

To me it seems like we see less of the first and more of the second now.

When your type is being questioned it used to be youd come back in and start explaining other factors that can cause differences in presentation, talk about different functions, the influence of things like health factors and maturity, or simply thank the person and tell them politely that you still think you are “this type” but you thank them for sharing their opinion. So basically, where back in the day this would lead to further discussion and improved understanding of type- today its actually seen as “bullying” by lots of people
 

Frosty

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Jag: I prefer vanilla ice cream over chocolate.
Betty: YOU KNOW YOU REALLY PREFER CHOCOLATE. ADMIT IT.

What did Betty accomplish other than make a few people wonder if she's a wacko?

Thats not really what Im saying and kinda goes back to prpl saying that it kind of sucks when people use type in a personal way to sort of make tjemselves feel better. When people are actually calling people sensors just because they dont like them- ect.

But should all of this be not allowed just because some people are stupid or have some sort of personal need to force someone else into a different box- I dont think so. That would be like someone going- you know, I think I have autism because sometimes I cant make eye contact- and then no one else being allowed to offer their personal opinion on it/tell them they might be wrong or their understanding of the condition might be off.

This is a site that was designed for typological discussion and there is less and less of that now I think because people ARE more afraid of the social consequences of doing it.
 

Frosty

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For example- when I first joined here I typed as INTP because I had this need, that I now recognize, to understand exactly why I never felt like “fit in” with female culture. I wasnt bubbly, I wasnt into makeup, I never cared for dolls and I related a lot to what I understood Ti/Ne to be at the time. People immediately started telling me I didnt seem very Ti. Everyone questioned my type. It kinda sucked a little bit because I really thought that I fit INTP to a tee when I came on here.

Eventually, this caused me to look around and try to understand why there was such a difference between how I perceived myself, how others perceived me, how I perceived typology, and how I really typed. It took a while but eventually I came around to the understanding that what I thought was me being a T type- was actually just that I wasnt an Fe type. It caused me to understand myself better as a person because I was willing to throw away a label that had served mostly just to make me feel better (even if it wasnt something that was conscious)

Had no one questioned my type I might still type myself as INTP. And maybe thats fine- but I am very happy that people DID question me- even if I didnt like it at the time- because it allowed me to step away from away from a label I was using as a shield and instead understand who I really was. It allowed me to fit a type to understand myself- instead of alter myself or answer questions, because of a cognitive bias, that turned me into someone who was desperate to fit a description to me.

-I see similar things from people on here all the time. New members who come on and demand that others see them as XNXX type- and then get upset when people offer solid reasons as why their perception of that individual is different. It means that, from what Ive seen, that person just gets more desperate to PROVE that they are a certain type- more distressed if you can believe it because they get SO defensive and offended that they start seeing people who DONT see them as that type as some sort of enemy. This forum isnt about people changing their perception of you just because you demand it- its about psychology and understanding DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES. And lately- I think thats something thats started to die.

Anyway. Thats my opinion- Ill leave this thread to everyone else for now- because I think Ive been pretty open at this point about my own thoughts
 

rav3n

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The line should be drawn with intent in mind. Are people weaponizing typology or are they simply providing their honest opinions. Unfortunately, the mod staff can't read minds so intent would be difficult to moderate for. One teller for intent might be context where someone pulls out typology as a shaming device out of context of a 'type me' thread.

Eg. Someone claiming the following, in the middle of a political debate.

You're obviously a sensor because you're too stupid to be an iNtuitive.
 

Hellena Handbasket

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Not really. I've only had it happen once and at the time it was more the person who did it (i did not care for this individual) and their reasoning behind it that annoyed me. If someone questioned my type I'd want you hear their reasoning. I'm also aware that I can be a bit of a chameleon in social and online situations. So I'd try and talk it out with the person.
 

Siúil a Rúin

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People can seem *very* different irl than online - or even in a video than in text. What happens online is that people will read one post and jump to conclusions about someone's type. That can also be quite presumptuous. I can see use of discussing anyone's type, but there is something extremely presumptuous to assume as a stranger reading 200+ words of text written by someone is enough to know them better than they know themselves. It takes a certain audacity to question a strangers type in a forceful and definitive way. I guess I find that aspect of it offensive - especially if it is derail from another discussion.
 

Mole

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Type is a general.term. Here we are talking about types of personality.
 

cascadeco

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Is it objectively a 'personal offense'? No. But it isn't always appropriate (ie intentions alluded to earlier), whether due to it being evident the typee is super attached to their type (and they weren't requesting feedback), whether due to it being done as a backhanded insult, and so on. If everyone who gave feedback on someone's type had neutral or good intentions and were offering their genuine perspective with a desire to help and enlighten, that would be another thing.

Personally I find it kind of interesting, as for me it often tells me more about the typer and how they view me and how they view the system. Also, the reality is mbti is used/defined in many ways, and it's used differently here on this forum than it is by most people in the world, ie take a 25 question test and that's your type.
 

тень

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I never got a detailed explanation how exactly I am a sensor and not an intuitive. So its more due to the fact I think their assessment is wrong, than it is taking personal offense. I think that people just have bad impressions of me due to political threads/discussions.

Funny how all conservative INTJ people have been banned, really makes me think.
 

тень

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That's not true.

It sure seems that way to me, Im not stating it as fact. I just know on discord, most of the people who were banned on there were INTJ. Like, maybe they just lacked maturity, like many young INTJ do, or they were banned for having right winged views. Both are equally worrisome.
 

RadicalDoubt

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I definitely don't think it's wrong for people to question other people's types, especially on a typology website. I think the real issue comes when people start being as ass about it or over push their assertion. If the person is "wrong" and isn't really taking your opinion well, it isn't your job to "teach them why they are wrong." People who aren't open to being wrong aren't worth your time. As long as people can figure out fairly quickly who is open to suggestions and who isn't, all is good.
 

Doctor Anaximander

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I like it because I generally appreciate reading others’ insights on my type but there’s a time and a place I prefer people to do it. I prefer they bring it up in the mistyped members thread or in one of my many type me threads. Or they can message me and I’ll start a new thread to discuss it.

Bringing it up in a non type related thread, especially where there’s a debate/argument occurring, feels like borderline ad hominem used to throw people off their game, but maybe I just have a fragile ego when it comes to that sort of thing. :shrug: Just seems like a weak tactic in some cases, like pointing out a big zit on someone’s nose in the middle of a heated discussion. I’d like to apologize for any time I may have done this to others in the past.

Otherwise, by all means please question my type. I may not agree but I’ll take it into consideration. I’d rather be confronted with any doubts or insights than have someone feel they have to walk on eggshells or go behind my back to discuss their doubts with others.
 

rav3n

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It sure seems that way to me, Im not stating it as fact. I just know on discord, most of the people who were banned on there were INTJ. Like, maybe they just lacked maturity, like many young INTJ do, or they were banned for having right winged views. Both are equally worrisome.
This site hasn't historically had too many active INTJs. The site owner's an INTJ who, if I recall correctly, has more conservative views. Not sure if he's a libertarian or more conservative. Coriolis is a libertarian INTJ, albeit they're socially more left. Edgar's an INTJ who's definitively not a left-winger. And so on.

So, they're not being banned for having right winged views. They're being banned for assorted recurring rule violations which isn't unusual for immature INTJs.
 
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