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Excited but scared! ENFP 4w5?

Sisparill

New member
Joined
Mar 18, 2021
Messages
11
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w5
1) Context:

a) What is your age range and general location (Country so that cultural values can be taken into account)? Do you have any impairments that may affect the way that you answer this questionnaire? Any religious or political beliefs (or anything else along those lines) that also might have an effect?

26 years old, Scandinavia! In terms of impairments I'm dealing with anxiety issues and depression which I'm taking medication for. Will in a few weeks sign up for an ADD investigation.

b) Which types are you currently considering? Why are you considering them and why haven’t you decided on one?

I have decided on one and pretty sure about it too! After days of research, pinpointing and discovery I've come to terms that I must be an ENFP 4w5 so/sx. Pretty damn sure of it. As i imagine is with many others, there are tiny tiny details which you can relate to in other types but as a whole and the various distinctions of the core types it hits very close to home.

2) What do you deem as your purpose in life?

Honestly. I have no idea and have spent my whole life figuring it out. Setting high ambitions and objectives for myself I never seem to be able to reach or complete. But one thing has always been consistant which is connecting with people. Not to be too self-absorbed here but I have received comments that my enthusiasm, curiousity and insights are valuable. And often feel like I need to impose/share myself on others for them to truly realise certain things. (Damn that sounds sick lol) But been trying to emphasise those good qualities to... I don't know. Use them somewhere?

3) Of the seven deadly sins, which one(s) do you relate to the most and the least and why?

I'd say a combination of sloth and envy. In recent years I've become very stagnant. It's been hurting my inner desire to change, which is paradoxical because I also have anxiety and fear of change. Almost like a shame. My outer shell does not talk about the envy of others but people who do know me know that I tend to compare myself to others way too much. Which is also hurting my own identity, whatever that truly is.

4) Analyzing your relationships with others, briefly describe:

a) The type of people you are drawn to

In terms of romantic interest, I like intelligent, charismatic people. People who are self-confident is a major turn on and if they are skilled speakers and listeners that's just really nice. In reality though I think I have settled for people who seem slightly naive and dumb about things. Forcing them (Not by will) to become an extension of my identity. After 4 years in a toxic relationship I realised I was dulling my own needs to please my partner (Complex story but I just wasn't allowed to be my true self). Ultimately realising this I was able to end it.

In terms of friends I've been drawn to people who enjoy long discussions about life, philosophy, concepts and ideas. It is incrediby stimulating as I get more curious about them and how they think and feel. People who are not afraid to take every single thing seriously and enjoy adult play but not ultra energetic.

b) The type of people who are drawn to you

I want to write a good answer here but I would say most people are drawn to me. There are people who I believe would find me annoying, sometimes demanding, hard to deal with and not logical. Which is only one side of the coin, externally. Most times I need to dismiss people as they've taken too much interest in me when the feeling is not mutual. But people who like to talk I guess!

c) The type of people you are repulsed by

Inside the box thinkers. Over-positive selfish people. Ambitious people. Inconfident people who follow rules and norms for security.

5)What are the traits in others that you admire but you cannot emulate yourself? Elaborate.

I really wish I was more diligent. Other people seem to be fucking experts on completing tasks, and doing what other people tell them to do. It is "admirable" and I wish I had more of that.

6) Describe your relationship with the following:

a) Anger

I always used to say "I'm never angry". It's true. It's a repressed feeling from my childhood and something I need to deal with as an adult. I see anger as losing control of what matters in a lot of situations. I can still feel Frustration and irritation but it never gets to any extremes. When people have seen me "Angry" it's explosive and instant. Over in seconds.

b) Shame

Oh boy... This goes up and down. Sometimes I take pride in my true self and what I "feel" I can accomplish. It is de facto that I don't which gives me incredible guilt and shame. Shame for the situation I am in. Shame for not doing more and realising myself more. List goes on usually at that point. But I'm trying to work on it.

c) Fear

My anxiety stems from fear. Fear of change specifically. It's a constant internal battle. I fear of being ordinary and for things to go smoothly. Something in me sets a kind of limit in my abilities and I feel fear to cross that limit. This has got be thinking that there's something wrong with me and only me. Talking to people who are "normal" experiencing the same feeling helps. Or therapy. Or discussions about why it is the way it is with fear.

d) Love/passion

I seem to be inable to do things that I don't feel passion for. Even as I'm writing this my brain get's so enthusiastic because it's lets me put down my thoughts in text while thinking of a million things at the same time. I need to stop myself from not writing too much as it feels like ALL of it wants to come out. But it's really because I'm interested in hearing what you guys have to say though! My romantic relationships have always been dysfunctional however. Don't need to go into detail. But I've realised I like the excitement of love at first sight and can sometimes become obessive in those feelings/thoughts only to later realise it wasn't actually true. Yeah strong instant love like that is like crack lol.

e) Conflict

I feel conflict stems from ignorance and misunderstanding. I want to understand other people and concepts, constantly searching for what makes them or it the way they are which deepens my understanding for them. When they are in contrast to me or wrong, I tend to challenge them. But do not see myself as a good debater. People have told me I have interesting thoughts and insights but just doesn't have that striking "logos" which a lot of people crave sometimes.

7) What are some of the themes that have played a prominent role in your life (ie. A struggle you’ve been unable to conquer, ect)?

Mentioned it a bit earlier but I seem to be doing so many different things all the time, but only for a short period of time and never actually following through. Not to say I dont have hobbies and interests though. Prominent themes would be philosophing about absolutely everything. Trying to understand how stuff fits together, both in people and structures, although with structures I tend to stay with abstract definitions and the bigger picture most of the times rather than A connects to B and to C and so on.(Fucking impossible to do logical thinking)

Another theme would be creativity. I feel most comfortable accessing my artistic side. Whether it's in painting, music, theatre, art. You name it. I'm not a master by any means in any of them but would say I have a great artistic sense.

8) Answer only one of the following:

a) [College aged and above] What is your area of work/study? Why did you choose this and would you change it? If so, what would be your ideal?

I studied Japanese Linguistics for 4 years. Also included Chinese and Japanese history for 6 months and rhetorics for 6 months. Why? God knows. I left my hometown in search of something new thinking I never make up my mind. It felt exciting to have decided on something and actually moving to do it. Quickly grew tired of it and decided to not over-achieve but kind of go along with it, doing what I could. Have always had a natural feel for languages and I'm surprised that I can converse in Japanese now. Never took my bachelor's degree though as the last semester stressed me out. I wasn't ready writing a thesis and my relationship was so bad I couldnt focus, anxiety grew, depression grew etc. So I never finished my education. Studying rhetorics though was fucking awesome. The academic side of it is always boring but the performing, the learning, the discovering and listening was amazing. Also got a lot of attention as having a unique way of talking, writing and thinking which really boosted my self-confidence. Lack of proper academic effort however could sometimes give me anxiety and frustration.

9) When meeting a new person, what do you tend to focus on?

Looks and their eyes. Some people have that charm about them that becomes mesmerizing. But personality wise, definitely a sense of humor. If they are relaxed or not, if they are open minded to my sillyness especially. If they're not, I can't deal with them. Become rather impersonal but have no trouble expressing thoughts or feelings if they really want to know I guess.

10) How do you feel about humanity as a whole? What do you feel are some of the biggest problems the human race faces and why?

I believe in people but I believe we are brainwashed from the day we are born to behave, think and act a certain way. In my mind everything in the world that "is" already, is counterintuitive, corrupt and injust. if people could realise this I think our real insticts kick in such as solidarity and we can become free. Biggest problem right now is global warming, corporatism and capitalism. It's quite ridiculous how little control the majority of people have over their lives but how strongly they believe they do or can achieve in the near future. Forget it. Y'all are chained down.

11) What are some of your hobbies and interests?

Since I've written quite a lot already I'll try to be brief here and not explain too much about them. I enjoy avant garde art in any form. Theatre. Writing sometimes. Communicating with people. Japanese TV shows. Jazz fusion. Playing online games.

13) How do you usually “hang out” with your friend(s)? When answering, think about what activities you tend to choose, whether you hang out with one person at once or many, whether or not you initiate the interaction.

It's much more fun to hang out with 1 or 2 more people. Since the pandemic started I haven't done a lot if any "hanging out" that same way but still feel that longing for human connection sometimes. I then reach out to a friend asking if they'd like to talk so lots of phone calls I guess. 1 on 1 is great cause we can give each other a lot of attention. Never been a big group person and tend to become a little uncomfortable and reserved. As if not quite fitting in and not agreeing with most people. Before the pandemic it couldve been walks and coffeeshops where we could talk. Movie nights. Talking has usually been the emphasis. Not been one to do exciting activities all the time like travelling, going to the cinema, parties etc. Though they have of course also happened.

14) What is more important, actions or words? Why?

Being someone who is very unable to express myself in concrete actions, I'd say words. Everyone is capable of refining their mind but not everyone is suited to improve their psychical weaknesses.

In the bigger scope of things though, I truly believe in radical change and unified commitment to ideals. So, actions.

15) Oh dear, you’ve been cursed by a witch! It’s ok though, you get a choice on which curse you will receive. Will you choose….

a) To never be able to experience the sensation of taste
b) To be immortal
c) To lose your memories
d) To be poor for the rest of your life
e) Or to never experience passion

Elaborate on why!

Hah! D for sure. In our society it would limit some possiblities, yes but that's not what matters. It's our experiences and what we can bring to the table, not what fucking house you live in or can afford.

16) What do you hope to avoid being? If it helps, describe a person who embodies what you avoid/you as a villain, ect.

I do not want to become a conformist or someone who loses their true self(whatever that is).

17) How do you relate to obsession? Do you tend to "merge" with others or your interests? How do you feel about the idea of doing this?

It's tough. I can easily lock myself in my apartment for days because one single thing was so interesting I have to continue doing it. Only lasts for a few days go before returning back to my obligations and the real world. Right now, like I said, things are very uniform and stagnant. Because of the pandemic and my depression.

18) Organized or messy? Plans and blueprints or impulse and surprises? What are you preferences and tendencies?

Organized for 1 minute, messy for 59. In the past, during lectures, I took notes yeah! But never went back to them and relied on others to have done more comprehensive notes. I seldom clean and tidy up. My desk usually messy and so is everything else but I guess I'd say I KIND OF know where things are anyway. In terms of sorting my thoughts, No way. I need someone else usually to remind me where my thoughts were going. Or sometimes I tend to discover it myself, usually mid-conversation.

19) How do you subjectively view comfort and how do you create comfort in your life and surroundings?

Deep satisfaction, Genuine attention and getting room to express myself are very important comforts. I have very few dear friends who are very important to me, or so I'd like to think. Rest of the people are just acquaintances. Don't mean they're not important though! I find comfort in having people understand me and giving their care/intellect to me to become a better person. This is also something I LOOOOOOOVE doing back. Making people realise stuff about themselves or about ideas and all that is extremely satisfying. If three traits were to describe me I'd say charming, unique and imaginative. Oh and maybe smart even though I know I'm not. Feeling those traits gives me incredible comfort.

Edit:

4w5

7w8

9w8

so/sx

^

Writing this down so I don't forget later. Anyone is free to take a stab at this. Been reading lots of different combinations descriptions distinctions it's so interesting but also a little draining. Gonna sleep on it and see what I find tomorrow!
 
Last edited:

Lady_X

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Jaq

Remember, Humanity.
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よこそう
 

Jaq

Remember, Humanity.
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ようこそ** Close! And thank you :)

I'm not a fluent speaker, but since I saw you said you took linguistics I figured I'd say that. :)
 

Jaq

Remember, Humanity.
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That's completely fine! Japanese has this crazy steep learning curve but once you're in it it's rather intruiging!


I'm likely somewhere in between an A1/A2 level by European Language proficiency standards. Never took a test for it though, so I don't know. I haven't been using it as much as I should be for someone who likes the language.

Are you certified in the language for proficiency? I know more than a few people who've gotten certified so that they can find work in Japan, or just with Japanese companies.
 

Sisparill

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ENFP
Enneagram
4w5
IAre you certified in the language for proficiency?

Gahaha! What do you think of me? Of course not. Those test don't mean anything unless you're seriously considering doing business in Japan. But in JLPT standards I'd say I'm at N2. I lived in Japan for a year and worked there as well :) Would say my speaking skills are higher than reading and writing.
 

Luminous

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Welcome to the forum!

I think 7 so/sx is extremely likely. Either 794 or 729. You could read descriptions here Hudson's 27 Type Profiles
 

Jaq

Remember, Humanity.
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Gahaha! What do you think of me? Of course not. Those test don't mean anything unless you're seriously considering doing business in Japan. But in JLPT standards I'd say I'm at N2. I lived in Japan for a year and worked there as well :) Would say my speaking skills are higher than reading and writing.

Yeah, just figured you were someone who at the very least stayed for a while. I see my hunch was right.

I'm curious, what language would you say you like the most?
 

Sisparill

New member
Joined
Mar 18, 2021
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11
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w5
Welcome to the forum!

I think 7 so/sx is extremely likely. Either 794 or 729. You could read descriptions here Hudson's 27 Type Profiles


Interesting!... First of all thanks for giving me your input. Tritypes are great when it comes to specifying exactly the way you communicate and view the world but can somehow feel a bit to tied down by the combinations and all these labels. But very interested in hearing your reasoning, you think I'm a 7? :D When looking at the descriptions of each number, my first impressions are, I'm definitely 4 or 2 or 9. My true core the one I am when I'm in peace with myself is without doubt 4. I know people don't like the truity enneagram test here but that's what made me investigate this whole thing and read more about it. The wings and how my result KIND of didnt make sense. Perhaps I need to do it again and compare. My highest was 4 followed by 2, 8, 5, 9, 7, 3, 6 and 1. So by looking at that I've got a clear dominant 4 but it's wings were kind of low in score. 8 with it's wings looked really interesting but when reading up on all types of combinations with the wings it became clearer how that was definitely not me! Not in the slightest. So you know, it doesn't make me stubborn, it makes me really curious! I read the description of 794 and a lot of it was really true. But this fear of rejection through showing emotion I couldn't quite get behind. The 792, not relating much however. The 7 so had this go-getting energy about it which I feel is not me as I tend to be more in tune with a kind of cautious introvert side. So external me and interior me are obviously still me but soooo different. Which is why having close friends understand that makes me feel special for sure. I'd say a lot of people get surprised to see me break down, worry and be unsure with myself - It happens a lot when I'm alone. External me can most of the times be positive, silly and humorous. Damn, talking about it makes me a little uncomfortable actually...

Edit: Oh before I forget! been reading more about the 4-9-7 combination (Not specifically in that order) and it's starting to make a looot of sense you were very correct in seeing those sides of me. Gonna do more research! But also super interested in hearing what ya gotta say.

Edit 2: Just thought of another thing! How would I go about determining these stacks? Some people have multiple types with wings in a three.
 

Sisparill

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ENFP
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4w5
Yeah, just figured you were someone who at the very least stayed for a while. I see my hunch was right.

I'm curious, what language would you say you like the most?

I really like the sound of turkish. Something about it is so cool. Also like polish very much. Honestly I'm a fan of all the languages I speak, I think they are interesting and soothing in their own way. Apart from english, It's so day to day and imposing somehow. What's yours? :)
 

Jaq

Remember, Humanity.
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I really like the sound of turkish. Something about it is so cool. Also like polish very much. Honestly I'm a fan of all the languages I speak, I think they are interesting and soothing in their own way. Apart from english, It's so day to day and imposing somehow. What's yours? :)

I echo the sentiment about each language being interesting in their own ways.
 

Luminous

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Interesting!... First of all thanks for giving me your input. Tritypes are great when it comes to specifying exactly the way you communicate and view the world but can somehow feel a bit to tied down by the combinations and all these labels. But very interested in hearing your reasoning, you think I'm a 7? :D When looking at the descriptions of each number, my first impressions are, I'm definitely 4 or 2 or 9. My true core the one I am when I'm in peace with myself is without doubt 4. I know people don't like the truity enneagram test here but that's what made me investigate this whole thing and read more about it. The wings and how my result KIND of didnt make sense. Perhaps I need to do it again and compare. My highest was 4 followed by 2, 8, 5, 9, 7, 3, 6 and 1. So by looking at that I've got a clear dominant 4 but it's wings were kind of low in score. 8 with it's wings looked really interesting but when reading up on all types of combinations with the wings it became clearer how that was definitely not me! Not in the slightest. So you know, it doesn't make me stubborn, it makes me really curious! I read the description of 794 and a lot of it was really true. But this fear of rejection through showing emotion I couldn't quite get behind. The 792, not relating much however. The 7 so had this go-getting energy about it which I feel is not me as I tend to be more in tune with a kind of cautious introvert side. So external me and interior me are obviously still me but soooo different. Which is why having close friends understand that makes me feel special for sure. I'd say a lot of people get surprised to see me break down, worry and be unsure with myself - It happens a lot when I'm alone. External me can most of the times be positive, silly and humorous. Damn, talking about it makes me a little uncomfortable actually...

Edit: Oh before I forget! been reading more about the 4-9-7 combination (Not specifically in that order) and it's starting to make a looot of sense you were very correct in seeing those sides of me. Gonna do more research! But also super interested in hearing what ya gotta say.

Edit 2: Just thought of another thing! How would I go about determining these stacks? Some people have multiple types with wings in a three.

The core is the most important; I would focus on it first. I also got type 4 as my type on that truity test. (I got 4-5-126-9-3-7-8 just to show you how off it was on mine... I'm a 9.) There are many many bad tests out there, and there are many many bad descriptions of what type 4 is. Here is a good one: Type 4 — Enneagrammer This site also has a good way of looking at how the types in a tritype interact: Fixes & Stems — Enneagrammer The descriptions I initially linked to are from an expert, Russ Hudson. I largely suggested 7 because of your intellectual energy feeling so scattered (I don't mean that in a bad way - I mean multifaceted, bouncy, big, passionate, interested in so much...) and you don't seem like a withdrawn core (which the 4 is) nor do you seem to need to individuate yourself from others the way a 4 would. However, I could be wrong. :)
 

Sisparill

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4w5
The core is the most important; I would focus on it first. I also got type 4 as my type on that truity test. (I got 4-5-126-9-3-7-8 just to show you how off it was on mine... I'm a 9.) There are many many bad tests out there, and there are many many bad descriptions of what type 4 is. Here is a good one: Type 4 — Enneagrammer This site also has a good way of looking at how the types in a tritype interact: Fixes & Stems — Enneagrammer The descriptions I initially linked to are from an expert, Russ Hudson. I largely suggested 7 because of your intellectual energy feeling so scattered (I don't mean that in a bad way - I mean multifaceted, bouncy, big, passionate, interested in so much...) and you don't seem like a withdrawn core (which the 4 is) nor do you seem to need to individuate yourself from others the way a 4 would. However, I could be wrong. :)

Awesome feedback. Will definitely look more into it. Oh and for other people reading this please feel free to type me or if you have any reflections or questions on what I wrote. That's why I posted here cause I want to know what you think! Leaving it to the experts first and foremost ;)
 

Sisparill

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Bump! Would like some more opinions on this :0
 

Koto

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sx/sp
ENFP 7 So/Sx seems about right, 479 tritype overall as well (749). You seem quite eclectic and outgoing, always looking to do more and be more if that makes sense. You talk a lot about feeling discomfort when you aren't being your true self, but a lot of it feels like you want the freedom to pursue all the things that you want to do rather than wanting to craft the perfect image of yourself (usually the image of being unique and individual and in need of rescuing from others), and you're somewhat aggressive in your pursuit of this, which gives more credence to the idea of assertive over withdrawn. You also seem as though you'd be part of the positivity triad than reactive, you don't seem particularly caught up on the negative side of things, nor emotionally reactive first and foremost; instead you express a lot of excitement and passion, and in general have a much more positive and agreeable temperament overall. You're very stereotypically ENP and Ne, which would make sense for a core 7, whereas you'd expect an ENFP 4 to be more ambiverted overall, less upbeat and scattered and more melancholic. I think that the qualities of type 4 that you associate with yourself are likely related to the frustration triad, of which 7 is also a member, and creativity/artisticness, which is definitely not limited to type 4 alone and is actually more directly linked to type 7 if anything.

Honestly. I have no idea and have spent my whole life figuring it out. Setting high ambitions and objectives for myself I never seem to be able to reach or complete. But one thing has always been consistant which is connecting with people. Not to be too self-absorbed here but I have received comments that my enthusiasm, curiousity and insights are valuable. And often feel like I need to impose/share myself on others for them to truly realise certain things. (Damn that sounds sick lol) But been trying to emphasise those good qualities to... I don't know. Use them somewhere?

Enthusiasm, curiosity, and insight are like some of the most common buzzwords used when describing type 7s, and for good reason, since they are the most openly receptive to new stimuli in order to avoid boredom and anxiety, not unlike ENxPs. Trying to emphasise positive qualities also runs counter to the idea of 4 core and lends validity to my initial vibe of positivist triad; an emphasis on the negative and how one is different and more 'flawed' than others is how core 4s tend to operate.

I seem to be inable to do things that I don't feel passion for. Even as I'm writing this my brain get's so enthusiastic because it's lets me put down my thoughts in text while thinking of a million things at the same time. I need to stop myself from not writing too much as it feels like ALL of it wants to come out. But it's really because I'm interested in hearing what you guys have to say though! My romantic relationships have always been dysfunctional however. Don't need to go into detail. But I've realised I like the excitement of love at first sight and can sometimes become obessive in those feelings/thoughts only to later realise it wasn't actually true. Yeah strong instant love like that is like crack lol.

Again, that desire for stimulation and high levels of enthusiasm are all big 7 energy, you're like an excitement junkie (xD) whereas people tend to underestimate the high levels of introversion that are implied with the type 4 description.

Mentioned it a bit earlier but I seem to be doing so many different things all the time, but only for a short period of time and never actually following through. Not to say I dont have hobbies and interests though. Prominent themes would be philosophing about absolutely everything. Trying to understand how stuff fits together, both in people and structures, although with structures I tend to stay with abstract definitions and the bigger picture most of the times rather than A connects to B and to C and so on.(Fucking impossible to do logical thinking)

Another theme would be creativity. I feel most comfortable accessing my artistic side. Whether it's in painting, music, theatre, art. You name it. I'm not a master by any means in any of them but would say I have a great artistic sense.

Absolutely no mention of feeling different and isolated from others, or envy over others and their happiness due to being satisfied with simple pleasures, etc, which I would expect most 4s to instantly talk about and focus on when describing major themes in their lives. Instead, your go-to option was to do with how intellectually curious you are about a wide variety of subjects and your inability to stick at things long-term due to your constant craving of new experiences. It writes itself.

I could go on but I think the points I'm making are pretty clear. ENFP, core 7, So/Sx, 4 fix, probably SLUAI in the big 5 system as well which correlates pretty strongly to both ENFP and type 7 as well.
 

Sisparill

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Mar 18, 2021
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4w5
I could go on but I think the points I'm making are pretty clear. ENFP, core 7, So/Sx, 4 fix, probably SLUAI in the big 5 system as well which correlates pretty strongly to both ENFP and type 7 as well.

Cool beans Koto! Extremely grateful for the detailed response a lot of yer speculations seem to be true. I've got a lot of reading to do ;) Thanks!
 
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