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Am I 4w3 or 4w5?

Pessimistic Hippie

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Hi.

So I'm pretty sure that I'm a 4 at this point. But I've read several articles and watched just as many videos, and I can't figure out what my wing is. I've heard that you can use either wing depending on the situation but that there's one you tend to rely most on, and that you can sometimes be confused with whatever your wing is.

Reasons I could see how I'm a 3 wing: I can sometimes seem very extroverted and upbeat if I'm in a setting where I feel accepted. I love fashion and being openly expressive using it. I can be emotionally volatile (someone said this is a sign of a 3 wing, I don't know.)

Reasons I may not be: I really don't see myself as a competitive person, despite the description given for sx-dom 4s in general. And I'm not ambitious at all lol. Usually I just try to keep my focus on doing what I know I personally like and, if I am feeling jealous/wishing I had something someone else does, I look into myself and think of other ways I can be useful without changing.

Reasons I could see how I'm a 5 wing: Mostly because of what I said above about trying to figure out how to be comfortable in my own skin, rather than trying to relate to anything outwardly. I'm very stubborn in this way.

Reasons I may not be: Embarrassing to admit but I don't think I'm very intellectual or research-oriented. I know a lot about things I really care about but I get way too bored if I try to study things I can't apply to my own personal experience. I wonder if this is because I'm an ISFP rather than INFP?

I'm just wondering if there are any specific questions I could be asked that would better help me figure mine out? Thank you in advance if anyone tries to assist.
 

Opal Star

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Questions To Determine Your Wing:

1. How withdrawn are you?

2. How image-focused are you?

3. How strong is your work ethic?

4. Are you more focused on finding out who you are based on others' opinions or from your own research?


 

Pessimistic Hippie

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Questions To Determine Your Wing:

1. How withdrawn are you?

2. How image-focused are you?

3. How strong is your work ethic?

4. Are you more focused on finding out who you are based on others' opinions or from your own research?



Thank you. I think the problem with me is that when it comes to some questions like these...

How would one measure how withdrawn or image-focused they are, compared to someone else? I don't know anyone offhand in person who I can say for sure is a 4w5 or 4w3.

I have pretty good work ethic if I care about the job I'm doing and know how to do it well, I can say that. And when it comes to understanding who I am as a person, it's usually with the help of things like these. Other than that I form it form things I'm personally interested in/things I'd want to integrate myself with.
 

Opal Star

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I synonymize withdrawn behavior with introversion. Image focus can be viewed as concerned with looks and how you come across to other people.

You strike me as a 4w3.
 

Pessimistic Hippie

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I synonymize withdrawn behavior with introversion. Image focus can be viewed as concerned with looks and how you come across to other people.

You strike me as a 4w3.

You're probably right. I started watching another video a little bit ago on more differences, and they described 4w3s as people focused on performing but simply doing it a different way, which I 100% relate to lmao. Appreciate your time. Thanks.
 

Opal Star

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You're probably right. I started watching another video a little bit ago on more differences, and they described 4w3s as people focused on performing but simply doing it a different way, which I 100% relate to lmao. Appreciate your time. Thanks.

You are welcome.
 

Red Memories

Haunted Echoes
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You may object, but I actually think 4w5 for you.

In Integration:
A 4w3 is an intelligent, curious, creative person who has a million ideas… and actually executes them. The Three Wing helps the Four move from the fantasy in their head to actual physical projects and businesses that take shape and do well. They have a much higher capacity to produce results than the 4w5. The Three Wings lends practicality to the mindset of a Four, which helps them balance out melancholic and dramatic tendencies. A 4w3 will tend to focus more on their careers and often have lofty goals, with the confidence of a Type Three to achieve them. A 4w3 can also sometimes be more extroverted than a 4w5, the Three Wing drawing out a normally introspective Type Four into social settings and group activities that are enjoyable. The Three Wing allows the Four to access more energy so they move out of the pools of emotion and reverie and into the real world.

In stress or disintegration, a 4w3 combines the low side of both numbers. Both types have issues with identity, and so shame will be a core struggle. An unhealthy, 4w3 will be hyper-conscious of their image, become obsessive about relational issues (drama), and seek to find their authentic selves in projects rather than within. To maintain any kind of self-esteem, a stressed 4w3 seeks validation, trying to be seen as both unique and successful to impress others and win their love. The disintegrated Type Three shades the stressed Four with doses of anger and competitiveness. Who is more creative? Who is better than me to lead this team or make this decision? The disintegrated 4w3 throws modesty out the window, and can even act like they are royalty, which exacerbates the Type Four’s inclination to see themselves as ‘above’ the common person. Their finances take a hit as they spend excessively to create the right image, atmosphere, or environment.

4w5:
Healthy 4w5s are a great mix of the Heart and Mind Triad. The Type Five’s brain energy compliments the Four’s orientation to immerse themselves in all the feels, creating a person who can empathize wisely. Think of them as a creative guru best friend. The Five Wing adds impartiality to the inner and outer experience of a Four, allowing them the capacity to reflect on relationships, situations, and emotions in a more objective manner. They can distance their ‘selfhood’ from their feelings and rely more on facts. Type Fours are normally profound and insightful, and the Five Wing lends even more wisdom through intellectual analysis. 4w5’s have an abundance of emotional depth and sensitivity, being able to view others and society through intensely perceptive and ground-breaking lenses. This is a usually introverted type, often quiet, but with active minds and cycling emotions.
When stressed, 4w5s become eccentrics, agonized by emotions that feel overpowering and thoughts that race out of control. Their inner lives are so intense that they begin to drown in themselves, lost in a labyrinth of their own making. When this happens 4w5s often withdraw from their relationships and the outer world, thinking that no one could possibly understand their tortured experiences. This withdrawal causes their work and relationships to suffer because they aren’t living life, they’re trapped in their imaginations of reality. They rebuff all attempts at aid, insight, and practical help. In this state, a 4w5 can have a hard time holding down a job or taking care of their basic needs because in every area they doubt themselves. The weight of the universe rests on their shoulders, and they often escape into idealized memories. They can become hermits who don’t dare to trust themselves, other people, or society.
 

Pessimistic Hippie

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You may object, but I actually think 4w5 for you.

In Integration:
A 4w3 is an intelligent, curious, creative person who has a million ideas… and actually executes them. The Three Wing helps the Four move from the fantasy in their head to actual physical projects and businesses that take shape and do well. They have a much higher capacity to produce results than the 4w5. The Three Wings lends practicality to the mindset of a Four, which helps them balance out melancholic and dramatic tendencies. A 4w3 will tend to focus more on their careers and often have lofty goals, with the confidence of a Type Three to achieve them. A 4w3 can also sometimes be more extroverted than a 4w5, the Three Wing drawing out a normally introspective Type Four into social settings and group activities that are enjoyable. The Three Wing allows the Four to access more energy so they move out of the pools of emotion and reverie and into the real world.

In stress or disintegration, a 4w3 combines the low side of both numbers. Both types have issues with identity, and so shame will be a core struggle. An unhealthy, 4w3 will be hyper-conscious of their image, become obsessive about relational issues (drama), and seek to find their authentic selves in projects rather than within. To maintain any kind of self-esteem, a stressed 4w3 seeks validation, trying to be seen as both unique and successful to impress others and win their love. The disintegrated Type Three shades the stressed Four with doses of anger and competitiveness. Who is more creative? Who is better than me to lead this team or make this decision? The disintegrated 4w3 throws modesty out the window, and can even act like they are royalty, which exacerbates the Type Four’s inclination to see themselves as ‘above’ the common person. Their finances take a hit as they spend excessively to create the right image, atmosphere, or environment.

4w5:
Healthy 4w5s are a great mix of the Heart and Mind Triad. The Type Five’s brain energy compliments the Four’s orientation to immerse themselves in all the feels, creating a person who can empathize wisely. Think of them as a creative guru best friend. The Five Wing adds impartiality to the inner and outer experience of a Four, allowing them the capacity to reflect on relationships, situations, and emotions in a more objective manner. They can distance their ‘selfhood’ from their feelings and rely more on facts. Type Fours are normally profound and insightful, and the Five Wing lends even more wisdom through intellectual analysis. 4w5’s have an abundance of emotional depth and sensitivity, being able to view others and society through intensely perceptive and ground-breaking lenses. This is a usually introverted type, often quiet, but with active minds and cycling emotions.
When stressed, 4w5s become eccentrics, agonized by emotions that feel overpowering and thoughts that race out of control. Their inner lives are so intense that they begin to drown in themselves, lost in a labyrinth of their own making. When this happens 4w5s often withdraw from their relationships and the outer world, thinking that no one could possibly understand their tortured experiences. This withdrawal causes their work and relationships to suffer because they aren’t living life, they’re trapped in their imaginations of reality. They rebuff all attempts at aid, insight, and practical help. In this state, a 4w5 can have a hard time holding down a job or taking care of their basic needs because in every area they doubt themselves. The weight of the universe rests on their shoulders, and they often escape into idealized memories. They can become hermits who don’t dare to trust themselves, other people, or society.

Hey, thank you for this :smile: I'd never seen the last part of the 4w5 description before, and you're right, I do think the bolded area does fit me pretty well specifically.

I don't know though at this point in the sense that I'm starting to ascribe to the belief that whether I have one that I lean more on just depends on the moment I guess =_= Maybe I shouldn't be trying so hard to figure it out lol. Hell, I'm only ever like 75-80% sure I'm a 4 to begin with.
 

Red Memories

Haunted Echoes
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Hey, thank you for this :smile: I'd never seen the last part of the 4w5 description before, and you're right, I do think the bolded area does fit me pretty well specifically.

I don't know though at this point in the sense that I'm starting to ascribe to the belief that whether I have one that I lean more on just depends on the moment I guess =_= Maybe I shouldn't be trying so hard to figure it out lol. Hell, I'm only ever like 75-80% sure I'm a 4 to begin with.

If you'd like to have some discussions about the heart triad in general I can totally send you some stuff. A lot of people don't realize the core aspects of 4. I have a *little* 4 in me because my disintegration point from E1 is actually 4. XD Not sure I could ever see you as a 3 because you don't seem like one to toss emotions aside for an image.
 
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