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  1. #1
    Member BAD1973's Avatar
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    Default MBTI Hell...what type am I REALLY??

    Can anyone with more experience, knowledge, etc please help me?

    Back in college, I took a psychology class about personalities. We were all administered the MBTI by a professional. I tested as ENFx, and he said I was most likely ENFJ.

    Since that time, I've taken countless MBTI test and have always presented as ENFP. I just figured he was wrong in his assessment. So many online tests can't be wrong, can they?

    Fast forward 20 years. I was active in an MBTI Facebook group. Someone posted a "fun" thread where people posted a picture of themselves to let others guess what type they were based on the photo. I was skeptical, as I think it would be nearly impossible to type someone based on a single photo. I posted a goofy pic and the person came back and said I was definitely either ESFJ or ENFJ. I giggled and said no, thinking I was being reasonable. I ended up being really offended by the OP's manner. She was very condescending with her comments. I told her she was wrong and she told me she was so sorry that I had mistyped myself for so long. At one point she said, "Oh God, please don't tell me you identify as ENFP?!" I starting posting very defensively. She had hurt my feelings and I didn't know how to react other than to point out that she didn't even know me and was basing her opinion of very limited information. Instead of agreeing with me, everyone else who saw the post agreed with her. One comment I remember was, "This is the most Fe defense I've ever heard in my life!" I actually sat in my computer chair and cried. It's difficult to admit that out loud, but she really got to me. I deleted the photo and all the comments I had made, and subsequently left the group. I was so humiliated, and partly because I suspected she was right and didn't know how to proceed.

    I started doing more research into dominant types. I tested and, again, got ENFP...but I noticed the E and F scores were really high. Like VERY high. The N and P scores were much lower. I took some tests on cognitive functions and came to realize my Fe is really high. So I began to believe I was ENFJ, like the personality-professional-psychologist guy had told me ages ago.

    Then I discovered Socionics. And tested IEE. I rolled my eyes, assuming it was typing me wrong just like the MBTI. So I looked at which type seemed to correspond with what I thought was my MBTI, but it didn't sound right until I added the subtype. I thought I was EIE - Ni.

    I took some more tests after I found this forum, and it has me questioning everything. One of the tests typed me as ESFP (MBTI)

    I know I'm weird and a bit of an enigma. I don't think there is one type that fits me perfectly. Some aspects of every type resonate with me. This is normal. I just hate not being able to figure out what I am.

    Enneagram is easier for me, since it mostly comes down to what motivates me. I know that better than anyone. I'm definitely 7w8, although I also have a bit of the 6 wing as well. 3w2 resonated with me as well, though I don't think it's my primary type.
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  2. #2
    Senior Member wildmoon's Avatar
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    I'm sorry you had that experience. I don't know much about Socionics, but my take on the MBTI is that there are definitely flaws in the system. So it's normal to find people who fit their type perfectly, and other people who are on the fence between two or even three types. I think it's also common for the latter people to have socionics types that differ from their MBTI types.

    If it helps, a person with high Fi probably would not have been affected in that way by the Facebook group situation. They'd be upset and offended, for sure, but they would have concluded that the system is incorrect rather than themselves, and probably felt a bit sorry for the people in the group who were so invested in some theory that someone else made up. So you're probably a Fe user.

    My suggestion would be to choose whatever type fits you the most. To me it seems like you lean more towards ENFJ. But identifying as an ENFx is just fine.
    Almost too Ti to function.
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  3. #3
    Junior Member we are all mad here's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BAD1973 View Post
    Enneagram is easier for me since it mostly comes down to what motivates me. I know that better than anyone. I'm definitely 7w8, although I also have a bit of the 6 wing as well. 3w2 resonated with me as well, though I don't think it's my primary type.
    Same. Enneagram just clicked with me while I struggle with MBTI. I do think your response to Facebook jerks was very Fe. Was the keys2 one of the tests you took? I'd love to see the results on that.

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by BAD1973 View Post

    Fast forward 20 years. I was active in an MBTI Facebook group. Someone posted a "fun" thread where people posted a picture of themselves to let others guess what type they were based on the photo. I was skeptical, as I think it would be nearly impossible to type someone based on a single photo. I posted a goofy pic and the person came back and said I was definitely either ESFJ or ENFJ. I giggled and said no, thinking I was being reasonable. I ended up being really offended by the OP's manner. She was very condescending with her comments. I told her she was wrong and she told me she was so sorry that I had mistyped myself for so long. At one point she said, "Oh God, please don't tell me you identify as ENFP?!" I starting posting very defensively. She had hurt my feelings and I didn't know how to react other than to point out that she didn't even know me and was basing her opinion of very limited information. Instead of agreeing with me, everyone else who saw the post agreed with her. One comment I remember was, "This is the most Fe defense I've ever heard in my life!" I actually sat in my computer chair and cried. It's difficult to admit that out loud, but she really got to me. I deleted the photo and all the comments I had made, and subsequently left the group. I was so humiliated, and partly because I suspected she was right and didn't know how to proceed.
    Why did you find it so upsetting, do you think? Why did it upset you so much that someone suggested you were another type?

  5. #5
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    Is visual typing even real? I mean, you do sound quite Fe but that could be confirmation bias or something...
    Care to fill out a questionnaire? There are a few templates floating around here Questionnaire Compilation Thread

  6. #6
    Member BAD1973's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jellyfish1234 View Post
    Why did you find it so upsetting, do you think? Why did it upset you so much that someone suggested you were another type?
    It wasn't that she suggested I was wrong, but how she did it. She made me sound stupid for not realizing the truth. I didn't respond well to that.
    Likes Jellyfish1234, Metis liked this post

  7. #7
    Member BAD1973's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by There View Post
    Is visual typing even real? I mean, you do sound quite Fe but that could be confirmation bias or something... Care to fill out a questionnaire? There are a few templates floating around here Questionnaire Compilation Thread
    I'll check it out

  8. #8

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    There's a lot of low level, snarky idiots on facebook MBTI groups, and many of them think they're bloody experts. Don't let them get to you.

    What you describe--I've seen this happen to people a lot. I saw it in one of the ENTP groups not too long ago, where there was a debate going on, and people ganged up on a guy with an unpopular stance and started accusing him of being mistyped, saying he was actually an ENFP and not an ENTP. The funny thing, they weren't even debating on the original issue at this point. They were just using typology in an ad hominem attempt to shame him. ENTPs are generally known to be good at debate (the mature, healthy ones, at least), and yet none of these supposed ENTPs were actually debating the guy, they were just resorting to lame ad hominem attacks and type shaming. You'll see a lot of that sort of stuff in those groups, because they're poorly moderated, and I think Facebook is more conducive to that sort of herd groupthink, whereas that stuff is (usually) better moderated on type forums. So my advice, just avoid those groups, or stick to ones with more mature members. Be discerning. Avoid any group or people if you see a lot of comments like "X Types all do Y"--you know, very specific statements that completely miss the point of typology. I honestly think a lot of the people drawn to those groups are just low level, insecure identity seekers who want to pat one another on the backs in a big mutual ego-feeding circlejerk, and they ruin it for the people who actually come to learn about typology.
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  9. #9
    Member BAD1973's Avatar
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    Normally, I have a much thicker skin. I think it's because I hate the thought of coming across as stupid. It's a major fear of mine. When I was younger and less confident, I would even lie about liking certain TV shows or songs on the radio because I knew they were popular and didn't require you to use your brain to enjoy. I've since come to fly my freak flag and openly enjoy what I want, regardless of what others think. But a lot of my identity was wrapped up in people thinking I'm smart. Which is silly. I don't know why I'm that way.

    You're right about the people in that group, though. I was sitting there, crying, trying to debate with three people I had never met in person and that had no effect on my life whatsoever. I decided I didn't need it in my life, although that sort of reaction (taking my ball and going home, so to speak) is a bit extreme for me.

    I'm normally quick to defend others, but not so quick to defend myself. I jump in on the bandwagon with some self-deprecating humor and dissolve the situation that way. I can't think of another time when I've gone off in such an Fe manner before, but it was certainly eye-opening to me.

  10. #10
    Member BAD1973's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by There View Post
    Is visual typing even real? I mean, you do sound quite Fe but that could be confirmation bias or something...
    Care to fill out a questionnaire? There are a few templates floating around here Questionnaire Compilation Thread
    There are A LOT of questionnaires there! Any specific recommendations?

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