Am I another INFJ?

[cascadeco]

You seem a pretty straightforward J, both with what you've shared as well as you stating J has always been your most clearcut dichotomy.

What are you unable to reconcile about being INFJ or ISFJ? (ie what is your reason for not being certain of J and still being open to P?)

 

[Verona]

You seem a pretty straightforward J, both with what you've shared as well as you stating J has always been your most clearcut dichotomy.

What are you unable to reconcile about being INFJ or ISFJ? (ie what is your reason for not being certain of J and still being open to P?)

Reading information like the comments earlier in the thread that say that J and P aren't accurate for introverts because they lead with the opposite function.

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

I have considered ISFJ lately after learning more about how Si can work. The main hesitation with ISFJ is that I am and always have been so future oriented. I have an incredibly hard time living in the now and it is one of my greatest weaknesses. I am trying hard to try to enjoy life as it happens instead of always mentally projecting how situations are going to play out in the future. I was also a very rebellious child and teen which doesn't fit with the SJ temperament.

I coped with crippling social anxiety from the age of 12-25 so I tend to identify as an introvert. I do think I am more ambiverted when I am in a mentally healthy frame of mind though but I don't know if that would be enough to identify as an E type. I do like being around people but I also enjoy my alone time.

I think my weakest functions are Se, Ne and Ti. I relate to a lot of Te's efficiency and organization but I would be a terrible leader because I am very aware and conscious of offending people and hurting their feelings.

Since there are so many INFJs around, it would be great to know if you think I should continue to explore this type or if I am just one of that people that test as it but need to look elsewhere

I can see ISFJ because I think that Si-doms are good planners for practical things in the future. They are responsible and planning ahead is part of that. The future oriented nature of Ni tends to project further into the future than Si and does consider a lot of possible outcomes, so it does entertain a great many possibilities. One extreme and somewhat funny example of Ni being future oriented are people who like to plan for the apocalypse. A Ni-dom could enjoy entertaining all the possible future outcomes to plan for every contingency, but still focused around the central concept. It is an imaginary, hypothetical, conceptual future-orientedness that I doubt as many Si-doms would see as fun or useful. I think most Si-doms are good at planning for the future that is more realistic and tangible.

 

[cascadeco]

Reading information like the comments earlier in the thread that say that J and P aren't accurate for introverts because they lead with the opposite function.

I see. I think this is more of an issue with Socionics, but in terms of mbti discussions, J and P as outlined in tests are still perfectly valid for both introverts and extroverts alike (for example, J questions and what they cover have nothing to do with dom Fi or dom Ti / what makes a dom-Fi a dominant judger does not tie to the nature of the J questions).

In terms of how people can sometimes test out, SJ's I think pretty much always test as J, I think most NTJ's test as J, and NFJ's often test as J (and relate to planning/have trouble with pure spontaneity) but sometimes relate to P (this is because the way some of the J questions are phrased can be more tied Te than a strong NFJ intuitive may be inclined to relate to).

 

[Verona]

Yes I do think it is between ISFJ and INFJ at this point which is helpful... down to two options is better than what I started with. Here is a questionnaire answered if that is at all helpful

1) What aspect of your personality made you unsure of your type?
** There are aspects of both Ni-dom and Si-dom that I relate to. I can be quite sentimental and I do like to acquire a lot of information like Si-doms. I am also relatively practical. Ni-dom characteristics: I am very future oriented and I like to plan very long term future plans like I map out these elaborate budgets and projections of where our finances would be in 10-20 years. I plan out various retirement options. My husband (ISFP) thinks it is very strange. I also enjoy reading deeper meanings in basic things and most people think that is odd (or insightful depending on their perspective lol)

2) What do you yearn for in life? Why?
** At this point in my life I yearn to raise my children to be kind, thoughtful, socially conscious and respectful people. I also hope that I will finish the book I have been writing for 10 years someday.

3) Think about a time where you felt like you were at your finest. Tell us what made you feel that way.
** I feel like I contribute positively to situations when I come up with solutions that no one else considered but it is the perfect thing. I really enjoy offering that alternative perspective and solving the problem to help everyone.

4) What makes you feel inferior?
** fit, outdoorsy, sporty people or people who are so busy and driven all the time. I don't really feel inferior but I don't really get them.

5) What tends to weigh on your decisions? (Do you think about people, pro-cons, how you feel about it, etc.)
** I love pros and cons but ultimately I always go with what feels right to me even if it doesn't make sense on paper. I am usually just drawn to the right decision.

6) When working on a project what is normally your emphasis? Do you like to have control of the outcome?
** If it is a project I love then I want it to be perfect and I want it to express exactly what I want it to which can be difficult. If it is a project like cleaning a room I just want to get it done ASAP so I can move on to better things.

7) Describe a time where you had a lot of fun. How is your memory of it?
** Last weekend I had a few friends over and we played board games and danced and sang. It was lots of fun. I had a few drinks so my memory of it is a bit hazy.

8) When you want to learn something new, what feels more natural for you?
** Reading about it

9) How organized do you think of yourself as?
** Fairly organized

10) How do you judge new ideas? You try to understand the principles behind it to see if they make sense or do you look for information that supports it?
** I probably try to understand the underlying principles first

11) You find harmony by making sure everyone is doing fine and belonging to a given group or by making sure that you follow what you believe and being yourself?
** I can't feel harmony if there are unhappy people around. It is very disconcerting to me.

12) Are you the kind that thinks before speaking or do you speak before thinking? Do you prefer one-on-one communication or group discussions?
** Thinks before. I hate being pressed to answer questions immediately. One-on-one.

13) Do you jump into action right away or do you like to know where are you jumping before leaping? Does action speaks more than words?
** I like to know where I am jumping but I also don't like to waste a lot of time dithering around. I think both words and actions are valuable.

14) It's Saturday. You're at home, and your favorite show is about to start. Your friends call you for a night out. What will you do?
** I would probably go out. I have a very hard time saying no to friends if I feel like they genuinely need me.

15) How do you act when you're stressed out?
** I discussed this a lot earlier in the thread

16) What makes you dislike the personalities of some people?
** aggressive people or people who like to provoke people into debate or disagreement

17) Is there anything you really like talking about with other people?
** Books or music lyrics. I love analyzing that kind of stuff and seeing what other people absorbed and got from them.

18) What kind of things do you pay the least attention to in your life?
** My wardrobe

19) How do your friends perceive you? What is wrong about their perception? ? What would your friends never say about your personality ?
** my friends perceive me as the level-headed one who will calm them down when they are upset. They would say I am diplomatic and I can give them a new way of looking at things that they never considered before. Sometimes I am far more judgemental in my head that I appear on the outside. My friends would never say I am harsh or blunt. If I am forced into a position of leadership I will lead in a gentle way.

20) You got a whole day to do whatever you like. What kind of activities do you feel like doing?
** Some time alone to read would be delightful. A hike with my family. A Trivial Pursuit game night with my friends.

 

[Mal12345]

You're just another INFJ.

 

[Forever]

Yes I do think my age is what is making it so tough for me to type myself.

What stresses me out? Good question. I will divide this into categories

1. Social stress - I find it very taxing to speak to people I don't know. Performing or speaking in public is one of my worst nightmares. I hate gossip or drama which seems to be a staple of so many female friendships.

2. Oversensitivity - I tend to shelter myself from sad stories, the news etc. because it deeply affects me and makes me feel really burdened by it. I have a hard time shaking off negativity. I hate conflict and it makes me shaky and ill. I hate being surprised by upsetting things because I need time to process things alone and I hate crying in public which is always what happens when I feel things strongly.

3. Distractions - I hate being distracted by noise or other things when I am trying to focus. I like to anticipate all potential pitfalls so I can plan out several ways something can play out so all the bases will be covered. Too much spontaneity and wildness can stress me out a lot.

IxFJ

 

[Entp/infjGal]

Yes I do think my age is what is making it so tough for me to type myself.

What stresses me out? Good question. I will divide this into categories

1. Social stress - I find it very taxing to speak to people I don't know. Performing or speaking in public is one of my worst nightmares. I hate gossip or drama which seems to be a staple of so many female friendships.

2. Oversensitivity - I tend to shelter myself from sad stories, the news etc. because it deeply affects me and makes me feel really burdened by it. I have a hard time shaking off negativity. I hate conflict and it makes me shaky and ill. I hate being surprised by upsetting things because I need time to process things alone and I hate crying in public which is always what happens when I feel things strongly.

3. Distractions - I hate being distracted by noise or other things when I am trying to focus. I like to anticipate all potential pitfalls so I can plan out several ways something can play out so all the bases will be covered. Too much spontaneity and wildness can stress me out a lot.

At first glance, that sounds like a good dose of Fe you've described. The inability to extricate oneself from the negative emotional atmosphere you're immersed in. But you could also just be describing classic Fi empathy. They dislike conflict too, greatly value harmony and NO ONE feels their own emotions as directly and viscerally as IFPs.

The dislike for wildness and spontaneity indicates an Introverted perceiving bias too. Your need for a stable or consistent sense of reality. It could also indicate dominant judgment, either introverted or extraverted.

The planning in anticipation of contingencies sounds like Te which wouldn't be possible if you preferred Fe. But it does not necessarily have to be Te. It could be a (non-dominant) use of Pe, possibly Ne, in a secondary or tertiary position, in service of the preference of a dominant Pi orientation or introverted judgment "agendas".

But you say that you were wilder when young....that sounds like a strong preference for Pe in earlier days.

So... perhaps you're an Fi-Te user? Perhaps ISFP or INFP? Then again, perhaps you are an EFJ or even an IFJ. Sorry for confusing you further.

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

[MENTION=27915]Verona[/MENTION]
What is your book about that you are writing? That might actually be helpful in getting a sense of your type because it could demonstrate what is important to you, what you value, and what you choose to spend your time thinking about.

 

[Verona]

At first glance, that sounds like a good dose of Fe you've described. The inability to extricate oneself from the negative emotional atmosphere you're immersed in. But you could also just be describing classic Fi empathy. They dislike conflict too, greatly value harmony and NO ONE feels their own emotions as directly and viscerally as IFPs.

The dislike for wildness and spontaneity indicates an Introverted perceiving bias too. Your need for a stable or consistent sense of reality. It could also indicate dominant judgment, either introverted or extraverted.

The planning in anticipation of contingencies sounds like Te which wouldn't be possible if you preferred Fe. But it does not necessarily have to be Te. It could be a (non-dominant) use of Pe, possibly Ne, in a secondary or tertiary position, in service of the preference of a dominant Pi orientation or introverted judgment "agendas".

But you say that you were wilder when young....that sounds like a strong preference for Pe in earlier days.

So... perhaps you're an Fi-Te user? Perhaps ISFP or INFP? Then again, perhaps you are an EFJ or even an IFJ. Sorry for confusing you further.

I am definitely not ISFP because my husband is and I can easily see the difference between a high Se user and me.

I was a mix of a rebellious, wild child and a shy, compliant goody-goody. I am the type of person that will bend over backwards to accommodate you and get things done if you ask me nicely. If someone tries to control me or bark orders at me though I will balk at that and deliberately not do what you want me to. I actually just resigned from a volunteer position I had held for over 5 years because the new administration is very controlling and orders us around like we are mindless drones.

 

[Verona]

[MENTION=27915]Verona[/MENTION]
What is your book about that you are writing? That might actually be helpful in getting a sense of your type because it could demonstrate what is important to you, what you value, and what you choose to spend your time thinking about.

It is about someone coming to terms with a loss and growing as a person

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

My impression about MBTI is that all the various type possibilities exist on a continuum, so there is a continuum between INFJ and ISFJ, so wherever that line is drawn to distinguish the categories will impact which type you would be, since you do seem to fall somewhere between the two obvious extremes. I read more concrete adeptness in your description than what is typical for an INFJ. Ni-doms don't do well with linear, concrete thinking and miss a lot of details, but think in larger systems. Paperwork and planning logistically can be head-trauma for some Ni-doms, but when it comes to personality, each person is very individualistic.

I think it comes down to which type feels more comfortable as a fit for you. You could decide you are one for a week, then decide the other for a week and consider which felt more like home.

 

[Star Atlas]

Late to the party but I agree with the INFJ assessment based on what has been shown and discussed here so far. The main point that struck me for this was when you said you don't see the point in following endless possibilities ad infinitum.

I like [MENTION=14857]labyrinthine[/MENTION] and their idea of the continuum. I definitely think there is something to that. It is strange to me that one is perhaps just a tick over a line somewhere and that they are suddenly something else entirely. A blend (even if subtle) would make more sense.

The current 16 types seems very 2D flat and I suspect there is a more 3D effect to everything. Like squaring a wheel.

 

[Verona]

My impression about MBTI is that all the various type possibilities exist on a continuum, so there is a continuum between INFJ and ISFJ, so wherever that line is drawn to distinguish the categories will impact which type you would be, since you do seem to fall somewhere between the two obvious extremes. I read more concrete adeptness in your description than what is typical for an INFJ. Ni-doms don't do well with linear, concrete thinking and miss a lot of details, but think in larger systems. Paperwork and planning logistically can be head-trauma for some Ni-doms, but when it comes to personality, each person is very individualistic.

I think it comes down to which type feels more comfortable as a fit for you. You could decide you are one for a week, then decide the other for a week and consider which felt more like home.

Thanks. That makes sense.

I got my husband to read the descriptions of dom Ni/inf Se and dom Si/inf Ne to help me choose and he said I am very obviously Ni/Se. He also came up with many examples from the past week that support that.

I think being Si-dom would be more useful in my life as a mother and it is something I have wanted so I have developed it a bit. I can see that it isn't natural though and your dominant function should be something that you do subconsciously.

I appreciate all of the help in this thread.

 

[Lia_kat]

Late to the party too + no useful information but just wanted to say you sound very similar to my best friend.. and she's definitely INFJ.

 

[Psyclepath]

I consistently test as INFJ in almost every test out there. Occasionally I will test as ENFJ or very rarely INFP. It does seem like everyone thinks they are INFJ so I kept rejecting it as an option and looking elsewhere but maybe I do need to look at it more.

I read that a lot of people who test as INFJs are actually INFPs and I could relate to a lot of Fi descriptions so I went with INFP for awhile. The problem is I am a strong J. Out of all of letter dichotomies my J is by far my strongest. I am the person everyone relies on to plan events and I make schedules for everything. I also don't think my Ne is that strong. I think entertaining endless possibilities is a giant waste of time.

I don't feel like I am that rare though. I think everyone is unique and I haven't really felt like I was a "special snowflake". I am good at offering people alternate perspectives when they are having problems so I do tend to be the person everyone comes to for advice. I don't feel like I am psychic. I was a bit depressive and existential crisis-y in my youth but once I hit the age of 25 I became a relatively well-adjusted, optimistic happy person that doesn't get bogged down dwelling on the negative. I am very sensitive and can be strongly affected by bad things happening but I have also learned how to cope with my emotions and deal with them in a healthy way so it isn't something that leads me to have a burdensome or difficult life.

I have considered ISFJ lately after learning more about how Si can work. The main hesitation with ISFJ is that I am and always have been so future oriented. I have an incredibly hard time living in the now and it is one of my greatest weaknesses. I am trying hard to try to enjoy life as it happens instead of always mentally projecting how situations are going to play out in the future. I was also a very rebellious child and teen which doesn't fit with the SJ temperament.

I coped with crippling social anxiety from the age of 12-25 so I tend to identify as an introvert. I do think I am more ambiverted when I am in a mentally healthy frame of mind though but I don't know if that would be enough to identify as an E type. I do like being around people but I also enjoy my alone time.

I think my weakest functions are Se, Ne and Ti. I relate to a lot of Te's efficiency and organization but I would be a terrible leader because I am very aware and conscious of offending people and hurting their feelings.

Since there are so many INFJs around, it would be great to know if you think I should continue to explore this type or if I am just one of that people that test as it but need to look elsewhere

It's hard to tell. I'm trying to decipher what functions you're using to reason with; it'll be almost impossible to decipher perception functions from this as you're analyzing information.

As for hurting feelings, I relate to that. I think it's because I've done it unintentionally on so many occasions and felt myself astraying from everything I could see. I am getting a slight Fe vibe from this, but nothing conclusive.

By the way, Si-dom/aux types are not always obedient. In fact, Si in and of itself doesn't create any sense of structure to follow, because it's not a judgment function. The closest thing you'll find in correlation to obedient in the MBTI realm are Te/Fe doms, and even then they're just focused on external structures - which may or may not be correlated with obedience.

The other thing is that I don't associate strong Ne with entertaining endless possibilities. Ne is interested in questions that'll lead to more questions, but once it's developed, strong Ne is generally able to lock onto possibilities that are unlikely to generate any interesting information.

Please get back to me, because I want to see how your mind works. I'll tell you what type you are. All I see from the OP is an extremely confused individual.

 

[Verona]

It's hard to tell. I'm trying to decipher what functions you're using to reason with; it'll be almost impossible to decipher perception functions from this as you're analyzing information.

As for hurting feelings, I relate to that. I think it's because I've done it unintentionally on so many occasions and felt myself astraying from everything I could see. I am getting a slight Fe vibe from this, but nothing conclusive.

By the way, Si-dom/aux types are not always obedient. In fact, Si in and of itself doesn't create any sense of structure to follow, because it's not a judgment function. The closest thing you'll find in correlation to obedient in the MBTI realm are Te/Fe doms, and even then they're just focused on external structures - which may or may not be correlated with obedience.

The other thing is that I don't associate strong Ne with entertaining endless possibilities. Ne is interested in questions that'll lead to more questions, but once it's developed, strong Ne is generally able to lock onto possibilities that are unlikely to generate any interesting information.

Please get back to me, because I want to see how your mind works. I'll tell you what type you are. All I see from the OP is an extremely confused individual.

I did answer a questionnaire later in the thread if you want to check that out. I wouldn't say I am an extremely confused individual.... extremely confusing maybe

 

[Psyclepath]

Let me start by saying there's a heavy amount of Socionics in the way I type. The Socionics system answers questions that MBTI doesn't and thus I am reluctant to rely on the vague system that is MBTI.

Yes I do think it is between ISFJ and INFJ at this point which is helpful... down to two options is better than what I started with. Here is a questionnaire answered if that is at all helpful

1) What aspect of your personality made you unsure of your type?
** There are aspects of both Ni-dom and Si-dom that I relate to. I can be quite sentimental and I do like to acquire a lot of information like Si-doms. I am also relatively practical. Ni-dom characteristics: I am very future oriented and I like to plan very long term future plans like I map out these elaborate budgets and projections of where our finances would be in 10-20 years. I plan out various retirement options. My husband (ISFP) thinks it is very strange. I also enjoy reading deeper meanings in basic things and most people think that is odd (or insightful depending on their perspective lol)

I don't consider those related to Ni or Si in any way. The Ni explanation sounds more like self-preservation on the Enneagram than anything else. The Si explanation is a bit vague but resembles introverted judgment more than Si.

2) What do you yearn for in life? Why?
** At this point in my life I yearn to raise my children to be kind, thoughtful, socially conscious and respectful people. I also hope that I will finish the book I have been writing for 10 years someday.

Interesting. It's an Fe stereotype but I don't read this as Fe. I read this more as Fi, actually. It doesn't seem inspired by any ideals but the self. I see why you perceive yourself as a judger: I'm not ruling out Fi-dom at this point. Fi-doms, much like Ti-doms would often think themselves Judgers.

3) Think about a time where you felt like you were at your finest. Tell us what made you feel that way.
** I feel like I contribute positively to situations when I come up with solutions that no one else considered but it is the perfect thing. I really enjoy offering that alternative perspective and solving the problem to help everyone.

Rigid, self-centered perspective. Could you be a social type on the Enneagram?

4) What makes you feel inferior?
** fit, outdoorsy, sporty people or people who are so busy and driven all the time. I don't really feel inferior but I don't really get them.

Possibly indicative of weak Se.

5) What tends to weigh on your decisions? (Do you think about people, pro-cons, how you feel about it, etc.)
** I love pros and cons but ultimately I always go with what feels right to me even if it doesn't make sense on paper. I am usually just drawn to the right decision.

Sounds a lot like myself, actually. Ti-doms are deceptively prone to this. I imagine Ti and Fi doms would ignore empirical data and trust their gut, because they sense something wrong even if they can't see it.

6) When working on a project what is normally your emphasis? Do you like to have control of the outcome?
** If it is a project I love then I want it to be perfect and I want it to express exactly what I want it to which can be difficult. If it is a project like cleaning a room I just want to get it done ASAP so I can move on to better things.

Ji dom. Leaning Ne over Se for the aux. Strongly believing INFP. You're not overtly expressive with emotions, something I'd expect from an Fe-valuing type.

7) Describe a time where you had a lot of fun. How is your memory of it?
** Last weekend I had a few friends over and we played board games and danced and sang. It was lots of fun. I had a few drinks so my memory of it is a bit hazy.

I get a slight Feeling vibe from this. Fi-valuers subjectify the emotional atmospheres they perceive. Fi is harder to spot than Fe because it's not expressed in an overt manner. And I haven't spotted any of what I'd call overt Fe.

8) When you want to learn something new, what feels more natural for you?
** Reading about it

Not an experiencer, then. I could see this as indicative of Sexual-last in the instincts.

9) How organized do you think of yourself as?
** Fairly organized

JUDGER. Lol, just kidding. Too vague.

10) How do you judge new ideas? You try to understand the principles behind it to see if they make sense or do you look for information that supports it?
** I probably try to understand the underlying principles first

It's safe to say you're not a type with strong Te. I haven't seen anything to suggest this throughout here. I'm wondering if this inner judgment is actually Ti.

11) You find harmony by making sure everyone is doing fine and belonging to a given group or by making sure that you follow what you believe and being yourself?
** I can't feel harmony if there are unhappy people around. It is very disconcerting to me.

I feel you on that one. Reminds me of experiences I've had where I've been sidelined, voiceless and ignored.

12) Are you the kind that thinks before speaking or do you speak before thinking? Do you prefer one-on-one communication or group discussions?
** Thinks before. I hate being pressed to answer questions immediately. One-on-one.

Exactly what I'd expect from a Ji-dominant. Not saying other types wouldn't give this answer as well, though.

13) Do you jump into action right away or do you like to know where are you jumping before leaping? Does action speaks more than words?
** I like to know where I am jumping but I also don't like to waste a lot of time dithering around. I think both words and actions are valuable.

14) It's Saturday. You're at home, and your favorite show is about to start. Your friends call you for a night out. What will you do?
** I would probably go out. I have a very hard time saying no to friends if I feel like they genuinely need me.

15) How do you act when you're stressed out?
** I discussed this a lot earlier in the thread

16) What makes you dislike the personalities of some people?
** aggressive people or people who like to provoke people into debate or disagreement

I'd expect this from an Se PoLR.

17) Is there anything you really like talking about with other people?
** Books or music lyrics. I love analyzing that kind of stuff and seeing what other people absorbed and got from them.

5-ish. Think that's why I'm relating to you.

18) What kind of things do you pay the least attention to in your life?
** My wardrobe

19) How do your friends perceive you? What is wrong about their perception? ? What would your friends never say about your personality ?
** my friends perceive me as the level-headed one who will calm them down when they are upset. They would say I am diplomatic and I can give them a new way of looking at things that they never considered before. Sometimes I am far more judgemental in my head that I appear on the outside. My friends would never say I am harsh or blunt. If I am forced into a position of leadership I will lead in a gentle way.

I'm terrible at being diplomatic, and it's not something I pay attention to. Probably due to my weak Fe and Fi.

20) You got a whole day to do whatever you like. What kind of activities do you feel like doing?
** Some time alone to read would be delightful. A hike with my family. A Trivial Pursuit game night with my friends.

If I had to guess, INFP. ISFP and INTP aren't out of the question though. I really don't see anything to suggest Ni-Fe.

 

[Verona]

Let me start by saying there's a heavy amount of Socionics in the way I type. The Socionics system answers questions that MBTI doesn't and thus I am reluctant to rely on the vague system that is MBTI.



If I had to guess, INFP. ISFP and INTP aren't out of the question though. I really don't see anything to suggest Ni-Fe.

I do relate to the EII in Socionics a lot and the Delta quadrant. Thanks for your analysis.

 

[Psyclepath]

I do relate to the EII in Socionics a lot and the Delta quadrant. Thanks for your analysis.

I would say that an EII in Socionics is an INFP in MBTI. The functions are the same and to my mind that is far more relevant than any description, especially since MBTI INFP is based around a type that has perceiving traits: unfortunately an Fi-dom won't come through like a Perceiver would.

It doesn't help that inferior Se in INFJ has certain parallels with Se PoLR in EII; I mistyped as an Se-inferior at one point.