InherentApocalypse
New member
- Joined
- Jan 1, 2016
- Messages
- 4
Questionnaire nabbed from PerC forums, with some questions omitted.
2. Study these two images here and here. Which one do you prefer and why? How would you describe it?
The former gives a sense of infinity, of a vast sort of calmness and serenity, that transcends the realities of the world in which we inhabit. The latter could speak for any old Sunday morning, though I suppose you could project any desirable feeling onto that image: the person sitting there could be as you choose, and the picture itself could be symbolic of the life you have crafted (or else fallen into.) I don't suppose either image sparks of serendipity, though -- it seems as though the former, though susceptible to slight amendments as the seasons change and the Earth ages, is a measure of the lasting presence of nature. In that sense, I prefer the former -- it seems more soothing and calming.
3. Please describe yourself as a person if you were to introduce yourself to someone else like in a cover letter. What kind of person are you and why?
I'm disorganised. I'm fairly lazy. The idea of doing something is exciting but is rarely carried out. I'm quite insecure. I don't really have any gifts or talents, though I do have a sense of patience. I'm grateful for things. (That's framed very negatively, and depending on the situation I'd probably revise that letter, but for the sake of this typing-thing, I though I'd add what first came to mind)
4. What kind of person would you LIKE to be? Why? What kind of person would you NOT want to be? Why?
I'd like to imagine myself with a lasting mental resilience, a person who influences others in a positive way whilst remaining true to myself. I would not be susceptible to general peer pressure.
A person I wouldn't want to be? I can only say such a thing because of the general position I'm in now. I'd like to say that I wouldn't like to be vapid, but if I were this in the first place, what difference would it make? Do vapid people realise that they are vapid? Maybe I am - or maybe I appear like I am - despite believing myself to not be this? It all comes down to how others perceive you/how you want to perceive yourself, I suppose. I want there to be a harmony between these two things - as in, people perceive me generally how I perceive myself, which would be a positive thing, generally. Yet, what does it speak of innate values: being true to yourself because it is right, no matter what other people think or say? I always though I'd like to be beautiful, physically; it's a state of being that I've envied, but never been able to emulate, due to physical faults. But what does beauty offer? Better treatment? Pure aesthetics? Self-acceptance?
Well, all I truly know is that I yearn to be intelligent and knowledgeable; ethical, loving and loved.
5. Do you think there are any differences to how you described yourself and how people actually perceive you? How do you think others would describe you? If there are any discrepancies between these two that are you are aware of; do you know why exactly that is?
Aren't we the result of the closest 5 people we surround ourselves with? I can imagine, then, there would be some sort of overlap between how I act and how people perceive me. Sometimes, people present me with a supposed axiom about myself, framed in a positive light, and I feel quite uncomfortable. It's as if they don't know how clueless and unintelligent I really am. Or, if it's a physical attribute, I imagine they're being nice so as to not hurt my feelings. Which is stupid, really, and entirely my fault -- my own self-esteem issues cause such feelings, and when I'm not wholly concious of myself, I probably do slip into a persona that is more organic to myself.
That being said, people generally describe me as an 'educated idiot' - I know bits and bobs about certain topics, and I enjoy reading things and discussing them, but I'm very scatterbrained in real life, and I lack common sense. People have also said I'm insecure; that I can be paranoid about things; that I'm a worrier; that I'm a bit weird; that I'm funny, etc. I think I'd agree in an around about way, but not in an absolute fashion.
6. What in life do you find to be of importance? Why? If you are unsure you can always take the Value Test and post the results here. Do note that it helps if you narrow it down to 20 or ideally 10 values as suggested at stage 2.
Contentedness and happiness, in terms of your place in life, and the people you surround yourself with; the freedom to explore, both intellectually and physically; bodily autonomy; flexibility; honesty; constant re-evaluation of values and morals.
Essentially, I value people and freedoms. I sound like an all-American gal there, but you know.
11. Describe your relationship to society. What are the elements of it you hold important or unimportant (e.g. social norms, values, customs, traditions)? How do you see people as a whole?
People as a whole...group-think is of course powerful, but I'm an optimist about the vast majority of people, most of the time. I quite like delving into that feeling of sonder...I've always though that solipsism was an asinine school of thought. It seems impossible, firstly; and secondly, though it's interesting to contemplate, it makes little sense that the world would be how it is, if it were all just projections of my conciousness. I know that people have their own minds and influences; I know that sometimes, we may fundamentally disagree on things; but nevertheless, people are complex, individual beings, and it's easy to forget that. I can't imagine my life without some people, because I love them so, yet it is so easy for others to overlook or disrespect them in some way. Yet, don't we do the same? It's weird....tribal minds and all. As for society...I'd end up rambling on all day about this, so I'd better just say: some traditions and values are harmless or even good; some seem slightly redundant. But, you know, culture flows, as long as there isn't some force actively repressing it, or moulding it.
14. What is it that you fear in life? Why? How does this fear manifest to you both in how you think and how you act?
Subjugation, loss of autonomy, being ostracised. I think these fears are somewhat universal.
Actually, a while ago I was obsessed with the idea that I was somehow terminally ill (each minor symptom was, apparently, a sign of so much worse) and I became depressed thinking about the deterministic nature of my body - how, even though I lived healthily, there'd always be something that could go wrong, through no fault of my own, and I'd wither and die. Except, the withering and dying wasn't actually my main fear. It was the scheduled hospital treatments; the chemicals that would be pumped through my body; my mum and dad being overcome with worry and sadness; the fact that life wouldn't be fluid and tumultuous, but would turn into a sort of scheduled misery: cold and lonely and forever shrouded in a fog. I would bargain with myself: if I became ill, I wouldn't tell anyone; I'd continue as normal, and if worst came to worse, I'd kill myself. Then the logical part told me that I wouldn't do any of that: that my natural fear would cling to whatever presented itself as comforting and knowledgeable, and I would go on in that sense. I couldn't tell you why I got like this for a while, or why I eventually stopped: it might have been some sort of momentary lapse of my general sanity, or whatever else. It was weird. While I was feeling this way, I became outwardly more depressed, paranoid, and melancholy -- I even had a small breakdown in a carpark, which I know was pathetic. I mean, there are people who are genuinely suffering, and I was acting in such a way because of something I imagined was happening?! But, yeah. When it was over, I think I became less...erratic? I stopped looking for assurance everywhere, and I think my general countenance returned to a more calm state (which I'm sure everyone was glad for.)
15. What is it that you desire in life? What do you strive to achieve? Why? Where do you think these drives and desires stem from or are inspired by?
I know I want to, somehow, contribute to something that will help humanity in some way, or will otherwise just be something pretty cool. You know, like working on something scientific, or researching into some lost history, or writing a novel that will resonate with people, that they can simultaneously enjoy and develop some thought processes that they may not have considered before. Yet I also know that this is futile, because I'm not nearly intelligent enough to accomplish any of this. I think this drive merely came from the fact that I know what I enjoy doing, but I'm not acutely aware of all of the actualities of adult life yet.
As a child, there were some vague ideas that I could grasp that I knew would probably await me in the future. Yet, nothing was ever concrete, and I think this feeling has carried on. I would say now, that I don't want children, that I'd be content with a partner. But I can only know this in the now. Knowing my nature, however, I would end up waiting and waiting...and then it would be too late; I'd have probably hit menopause, or past that, just waitin' to make a decision. Would I be overcome with regret? What we don't know can't hurt us, and all of that jazz? Well, the human imagination is a testament against this, in some manner: what we don't know can't hurt us in its actuality, but we'll craft things anyhow, because that's what we do. But, if we are to talk about this, then it is surely a lot less pressure to not create a life and bring it into this world...Kierkegaard did say we'd regret anything we did, or didn't do, because that's the nature of man.
(Missed out some questions because I would end up talking too much about them - in an idiotic manner at that - so I hope this is enough for anyone out there who wants to type me)
2. Study these two images here and here. Which one do you prefer and why? How would you describe it?
The former gives a sense of infinity, of a vast sort of calmness and serenity, that transcends the realities of the world in which we inhabit. The latter could speak for any old Sunday morning, though I suppose you could project any desirable feeling onto that image: the person sitting there could be as you choose, and the picture itself could be symbolic of the life you have crafted (or else fallen into.) I don't suppose either image sparks of serendipity, though -- it seems as though the former, though susceptible to slight amendments as the seasons change and the Earth ages, is a measure of the lasting presence of nature. In that sense, I prefer the former -- it seems more soothing and calming.
3. Please describe yourself as a person if you were to introduce yourself to someone else like in a cover letter. What kind of person are you and why?
I'm disorganised. I'm fairly lazy. The idea of doing something is exciting but is rarely carried out. I'm quite insecure. I don't really have any gifts or talents, though I do have a sense of patience. I'm grateful for things. (That's framed very negatively, and depending on the situation I'd probably revise that letter, but for the sake of this typing-thing, I though I'd add what first came to mind)
4. What kind of person would you LIKE to be? Why? What kind of person would you NOT want to be? Why?
I'd like to imagine myself with a lasting mental resilience, a person who influences others in a positive way whilst remaining true to myself. I would not be susceptible to general peer pressure.
A person I wouldn't want to be? I can only say such a thing because of the general position I'm in now. I'd like to say that I wouldn't like to be vapid, but if I were this in the first place, what difference would it make? Do vapid people realise that they are vapid? Maybe I am - or maybe I appear like I am - despite believing myself to not be this? It all comes down to how others perceive you/how you want to perceive yourself, I suppose. I want there to be a harmony between these two things - as in, people perceive me generally how I perceive myself, which would be a positive thing, generally. Yet, what does it speak of innate values: being true to yourself because it is right, no matter what other people think or say? I always though I'd like to be beautiful, physically; it's a state of being that I've envied, but never been able to emulate, due to physical faults. But what does beauty offer? Better treatment? Pure aesthetics? Self-acceptance?
Well, all I truly know is that I yearn to be intelligent and knowledgeable; ethical, loving and loved.
5. Do you think there are any differences to how you described yourself and how people actually perceive you? How do you think others would describe you? If there are any discrepancies between these two that are you are aware of; do you know why exactly that is?
Aren't we the result of the closest 5 people we surround ourselves with? I can imagine, then, there would be some sort of overlap between how I act and how people perceive me. Sometimes, people present me with a supposed axiom about myself, framed in a positive light, and I feel quite uncomfortable. It's as if they don't know how clueless and unintelligent I really am. Or, if it's a physical attribute, I imagine they're being nice so as to not hurt my feelings. Which is stupid, really, and entirely my fault -- my own self-esteem issues cause such feelings, and when I'm not wholly concious of myself, I probably do slip into a persona that is more organic to myself.
That being said, people generally describe me as an 'educated idiot' - I know bits and bobs about certain topics, and I enjoy reading things and discussing them, but I'm very scatterbrained in real life, and I lack common sense. People have also said I'm insecure; that I can be paranoid about things; that I'm a worrier; that I'm a bit weird; that I'm funny, etc. I think I'd agree in an around about way, but not in an absolute fashion.
6. What in life do you find to be of importance? Why? If you are unsure you can always take the Value Test and post the results here. Do note that it helps if you narrow it down to 20 or ideally 10 values as suggested at stage 2.
Contentedness and happiness, in terms of your place in life, and the people you surround yourself with; the freedom to explore, both intellectually and physically; bodily autonomy; flexibility; honesty; constant re-evaluation of values and morals.
Essentially, I value people and freedoms. I sound like an all-American gal there, but you know.
11. Describe your relationship to society. What are the elements of it you hold important or unimportant (e.g. social norms, values, customs, traditions)? How do you see people as a whole?
People as a whole...group-think is of course powerful, but I'm an optimist about the vast majority of people, most of the time. I quite like delving into that feeling of sonder...I've always though that solipsism was an asinine school of thought. It seems impossible, firstly; and secondly, though it's interesting to contemplate, it makes little sense that the world would be how it is, if it were all just projections of my conciousness. I know that people have their own minds and influences; I know that sometimes, we may fundamentally disagree on things; but nevertheless, people are complex, individual beings, and it's easy to forget that. I can't imagine my life without some people, because I love them so, yet it is so easy for others to overlook or disrespect them in some way. Yet, don't we do the same? It's weird....tribal minds and all. As for society...I'd end up rambling on all day about this, so I'd better just say: some traditions and values are harmless or even good; some seem slightly redundant. But, you know, culture flows, as long as there isn't some force actively repressing it, or moulding it.
14. What is it that you fear in life? Why? How does this fear manifest to you both in how you think and how you act?
Subjugation, loss of autonomy, being ostracised. I think these fears are somewhat universal.
Actually, a while ago I was obsessed with the idea that I was somehow terminally ill (each minor symptom was, apparently, a sign of so much worse) and I became depressed thinking about the deterministic nature of my body - how, even though I lived healthily, there'd always be something that could go wrong, through no fault of my own, and I'd wither and die. Except, the withering and dying wasn't actually my main fear. It was the scheduled hospital treatments; the chemicals that would be pumped through my body; my mum and dad being overcome with worry and sadness; the fact that life wouldn't be fluid and tumultuous, but would turn into a sort of scheduled misery: cold and lonely and forever shrouded in a fog. I would bargain with myself: if I became ill, I wouldn't tell anyone; I'd continue as normal, and if worst came to worse, I'd kill myself. Then the logical part told me that I wouldn't do any of that: that my natural fear would cling to whatever presented itself as comforting and knowledgeable, and I would go on in that sense. I couldn't tell you why I got like this for a while, or why I eventually stopped: it might have been some sort of momentary lapse of my general sanity, or whatever else. It was weird. While I was feeling this way, I became outwardly more depressed, paranoid, and melancholy -- I even had a small breakdown in a carpark, which I know was pathetic. I mean, there are people who are genuinely suffering, and I was acting in such a way because of something I imagined was happening?! But, yeah. When it was over, I think I became less...erratic? I stopped looking for assurance everywhere, and I think my general countenance returned to a more calm state (which I'm sure everyone was glad for.)
15. What is it that you desire in life? What do you strive to achieve? Why? Where do you think these drives and desires stem from or are inspired by?
I know I want to, somehow, contribute to something that will help humanity in some way, or will otherwise just be something pretty cool. You know, like working on something scientific, or researching into some lost history, or writing a novel that will resonate with people, that they can simultaneously enjoy and develop some thought processes that they may not have considered before. Yet I also know that this is futile, because I'm not nearly intelligent enough to accomplish any of this. I think this drive merely came from the fact that I know what I enjoy doing, but I'm not acutely aware of all of the actualities of adult life yet.
As a child, there were some vague ideas that I could grasp that I knew would probably await me in the future. Yet, nothing was ever concrete, and I think this feeling has carried on. I would say now, that I don't want children, that I'd be content with a partner. But I can only know this in the now. Knowing my nature, however, I would end up waiting and waiting...and then it would be too late; I'd have probably hit menopause, or past that, just waitin' to make a decision. Would I be overcome with regret? What we don't know can't hurt us, and all of that jazz? Well, the human imagination is a testament against this, in some manner: what we don't know can't hurt us in its actuality, but we'll craft things anyhow, because that's what we do. But, if we are to talk about this, then it is surely a lot less pressure to not create a life and bring it into this world...Kierkegaard did say we'd regret anything we did, or didn't do, because that's the nature of man.
(Missed out some questions because I would end up talking too much about them - in an idiotic manner at that - so I hope this is enough for anyone out there who wants to type me)
