Null
-
- Joined
- May 15, 2015
- Messages
- 315
- Enneagram
- 6w7
- Instinctual Variant
- sp/so
I'd really like to get help in figuring out my MBTI and Enneagram type, plus tritype and instincts. Some types resonate more with me than others, but I'd like to get another perspective. I'm generally having problems with this, since my personality seems to change one day to the next, parts of me contradict one another and different people view me entirely differently. It's hard for me to distinguish how I behave in certain situations and how I behave normally.
Please don’t think I’m a horrible person, I’ve mostly been focusing on the negative aspects on my personality here, they are easier for me to talk about. Believe me, I do have some positive qualities. I'm not an expert in Enneagram though, so if I'm wrong about any of those, please tell me. Please excuse my awkward writing, I wrote this in one setting and my English sucks.
1: You could say I'm quite bossy, especially when it comes to work-related stuff (although I'll feel ashamed for it later on). I'd rather take control of something, than have someone else do it wrongly or incompletely. I'm open to other's point of views and suggestions, but if those can't convince me, I'll keep to my first instinct. Through this I've learned to trust my skills, I guess. Although I'm really indecisive when it comes to personal stuff, once I've made up my mind, I can be quite stubborn about it. Failing at something really drags me down and makes me feel worthless, so I try to avoid this. I'm really sensitive to criticism and always take it to heart, because I feel like people are criticising me as a person, and not my work. Despite that, I'm a very critical person myself and if something doesn't make sense to me (both logically or ethically) I'll point it out.
Doubt: I have around zero self-discipline and I'm really, really lazy. I'll avoid doing stuff until the last minute and then try to do it flawlessly, which doesn't always work obviously.
2: My desire for recognition and acknowledgement is very strong, I feel like what I'm doing is worthless until someone tells me otherwise. If people don't like me, how can I be sure I'm a likeable person at all? I want to feel like I'm playing an important role in another person's life and I'm valuable to them, and not exchangeable. My worth is very dependant on other's opinions and sometimes I even feel like I don’t have a real personality, since I always adjust to other people – it sucks. It's hard for me to be myself in intimate relationships, which leads me to not really having any close friends. I hold back, since I'm afraid I'll seem ridiculous. I really indentify with Palmer's sp 2, like getting very impatient when having to wait for something, because I'm scared there won't be enough left for me once I get there.
Doubt: I often fail at getting other people to like me, since I'm an introverted person who's very private and keeps to herself. I also suck at comforting other people or giving advice, and usually don’t know how to react when someone starts crying. More importanty, I do feel like I can take care of myself and don't want to depend on other people to provide everything for me.
3: When it comes to anything other than sports (I suck at sports and won’t even try) I’ll always want to be the best. I’m happy for other people if they’re doing good, but I always strife to be better than average – which doesn’t excatly go hand in hand with my laziness. I guess I just learned that I can achieve good results without having to put much work into it. I usually evaluate my performance by comparing it to the performace of other people.
Doubt: I'm not coming from a success and result driven family, I wasn't raised to think that my value is defined trough my achievements and hard work. I have really, really low self-esteem and I'm not what you'd call and efficient person
4: I'm always feeling like people are avoiding and abandoning me, which is also one of my greatest fears. I'm a quite melancholic person, who experiences her emotions quite deeply and expresses them usually. As a teenager, I often envied other people and felt like I deserved more than I've got, like I was treated unfairly, but that's a weakness that I'm currently overcoming (in realizing that we all have our own battles and no one's better off actually). I feel drawn towards mystical stuff and art that expresses yearning and desire. I really relate to this whole 'pure happiness is rather hollow and melancholy is desirable' thing. Like the social 4, I worry way too much about what other people think of me in social situations. Socially I’m just not confident. I am self-conscious and anxious that I'll say something stupid and make an idiot out of myself, or that I'm just not good enough for other people.
Doubt: I express my emotions not because I want to seem like an emotional and deep person, but because I feel like I'll go crazy if I don't. I'll also prefer going with the flow than standing out through my individuality. Situations that are full of intensity (sex, birth, death, stuff like that) scare me a lot.
5: I'm very serious when it comes to my privacy, not even the people closest to me know what stuff is going on in my head and what I'm thinking about. When I'm with people who have an enormous temperament, I often feel like my privacy is invaded and have to go somewhere else. I'm really into the mechanics behind something, as a child for example I was never interested into magic tricks itself, but rather how the magician was able to pull the trick off. It's fun to think about everything that has to happen for something to work.
Doubt: Again, I'm not a self-controlled person. Sometimes I'm even quite dramatic (like exaggerating the amount of stress I'm in).
6: My fear is very generalized. I’m scared of new situations, meeting new people and mostly of fear itself. My fear is located right below my chest and I can feel it every time I'm feeling tense. I’d say my temperament is generally very nervous and self-conscious. I'm questioning everything I do, and keep on thinking about it, which often leads me to not acting at all. As a child I was so afraid of getting punished and getting on the bad side of people in power, which got less the older I got. Authorities still scare me though, but I find it easier to distinguish what will get me into trouble and what I can get away with. I guess I often act in a way that will make me appear harmless, like agreeing with people rather than disagreeing with them or acting like I have less knowledge than I do. If I can get people to like me, I won't have to be afraid of them. I’ve recently realized that I view most of people’s behaviour as an expression of their loyalties to things or people. Oh, and I can't deal with people who are blind optimists and go through their life seeing everything through rose-colored glasses.
Doubt: I don't feel like whole 'being devoted to something bigger than oneself' thing, being concerned with duty and rooting for the underdogs and stuff like that.
I don't have a lot to say about 8 and 7, but I'll go into them if anyone wants me to.
9: Since I was a child, I've always felt overlooked by others. I guess that it's been hard for me to know what I want, what's important to me and who I am since then. Adjusting to other people's needs comes natural to me and feels like the right thing do to, which is also why I will only express my views and needs subtly. If I'm afraid that something I'll do will endanger my relationship with someone, I probably won't do it. Comfort and harmony has always been priorities of mine, trying to be comfortable (physically, mentally and emotionally) often leads me to neglecting stuff or not doing it at all. Harmony is so important to me, that I won't get involved with people until I'm sure they'll like me and will agree with people, although I have a different opinion. I'm very indecisive, even in every-day situations. For example, I'll think about which kind of movie to watch for so long, that I end up not watching anything at all. Often I feel like I'm stuck in the position I am in now, it's hard for me to finish stuff and leave it behind me, but it's hard for me to figure out why.
Doubt: I don't have any problems with saying 'no' when others ask me for something I can't do / don't feel like doing. See anger.
Anger (I feel the need to adress this, haha): You could say I express my anger (like sadness and happiness usually) openly. People close to me tell me I get very stubborn and undiplomatic when I do, like slaming doors and trying to escape the situation. I'm never acting passive-agressive though, I always feel the need to make other people know how they make me feel. I also don't feel like I'm showing weakness like a 1 may feel like, it's just something that everyone goes through and I don't have to be ashamed of that.
I might go more into Fear and Shame later on.
I’d really, really like to know my MBTI type based on functions, but don’t know where to start. The questionnaires don’t really appeal to me and I don’t have enough confidence in my knowledge about the functions to just start writing about them. I'm also reluctant to describe images or stuff like that, because I can always see the various ways in which I could describe a picture and can never be sure what my own impression was and what wasn't. All I know is that I’m an introvert and it’ll be very hard to convince me otherwise, haha.
Please don’t think I’m a horrible person, I’ve mostly been focusing on the negative aspects on my personality here, they are easier for me to talk about. Believe me, I do have some positive qualities. I'm not an expert in Enneagram though, so if I'm wrong about any of those, please tell me. Please excuse my awkward writing, I wrote this in one setting and my English sucks.
1: You could say I'm quite bossy, especially when it comes to work-related stuff (although I'll feel ashamed for it later on). I'd rather take control of something, than have someone else do it wrongly or incompletely. I'm open to other's point of views and suggestions, but if those can't convince me, I'll keep to my first instinct. Through this I've learned to trust my skills, I guess. Although I'm really indecisive when it comes to personal stuff, once I've made up my mind, I can be quite stubborn about it. Failing at something really drags me down and makes me feel worthless, so I try to avoid this. I'm really sensitive to criticism and always take it to heart, because I feel like people are criticising me as a person, and not my work. Despite that, I'm a very critical person myself and if something doesn't make sense to me (both logically or ethically) I'll point it out.
Doubt: I have around zero self-discipline and I'm really, really lazy. I'll avoid doing stuff until the last minute and then try to do it flawlessly, which doesn't always work obviously.
2: My desire for recognition and acknowledgement is very strong, I feel like what I'm doing is worthless until someone tells me otherwise. If people don't like me, how can I be sure I'm a likeable person at all? I want to feel like I'm playing an important role in another person's life and I'm valuable to them, and not exchangeable. My worth is very dependant on other's opinions and sometimes I even feel like I don’t have a real personality, since I always adjust to other people – it sucks. It's hard for me to be myself in intimate relationships, which leads me to not really having any close friends. I hold back, since I'm afraid I'll seem ridiculous. I really indentify with Palmer's sp 2, like getting very impatient when having to wait for something, because I'm scared there won't be enough left for me once I get there.
Doubt: I often fail at getting other people to like me, since I'm an introverted person who's very private and keeps to herself. I also suck at comforting other people or giving advice, and usually don’t know how to react when someone starts crying. More importanty, I do feel like I can take care of myself and don't want to depend on other people to provide everything for me.
3: When it comes to anything other than sports (I suck at sports and won’t even try) I’ll always want to be the best. I’m happy for other people if they’re doing good, but I always strife to be better than average – which doesn’t excatly go hand in hand with my laziness. I guess I just learned that I can achieve good results without having to put much work into it. I usually evaluate my performance by comparing it to the performace of other people.
Doubt: I'm not coming from a success and result driven family, I wasn't raised to think that my value is defined trough my achievements and hard work. I have really, really low self-esteem and I'm not what you'd call and efficient person
4: I'm always feeling like people are avoiding and abandoning me, which is also one of my greatest fears. I'm a quite melancholic person, who experiences her emotions quite deeply and expresses them usually. As a teenager, I often envied other people and felt like I deserved more than I've got, like I was treated unfairly, but that's a weakness that I'm currently overcoming (in realizing that we all have our own battles and no one's better off actually). I feel drawn towards mystical stuff and art that expresses yearning and desire. I really relate to this whole 'pure happiness is rather hollow and melancholy is desirable' thing. Like the social 4, I worry way too much about what other people think of me in social situations. Socially I’m just not confident. I am self-conscious and anxious that I'll say something stupid and make an idiot out of myself, or that I'm just not good enough for other people.
Doubt: I express my emotions not because I want to seem like an emotional and deep person, but because I feel like I'll go crazy if I don't. I'll also prefer going with the flow than standing out through my individuality. Situations that are full of intensity (sex, birth, death, stuff like that) scare me a lot.
5: I'm very serious when it comes to my privacy, not even the people closest to me know what stuff is going on in my head and what I'm thinking about. When I'm with people who have an enormous temperament, I often feel like my privacy is invaded and have to go somewhere else. I'm really into the mechanics behind something, as a child for example I was never interested into magic tricks itself, but rather how the magician was able to pull the trick off. It's fun to think about everything that has to happen for something to work.
Doubt: Again, I'm not a self-controlled person. Sometimes I'm even quite dramatic (like exaggerating the amount of stress I'm in).
6: My fear is very generalized. I’m scared of new situations, meeting new people and mostly of fear itself. My fear is located right below my chest and I can feel it every time I'm feeling tense. I’d say my temperament is generally very nervous and self-conscious. I'm questioning everything I do, and keep on thinking about it, which often leads me to not acting at all. As a child I was so afraid of getting punished and getting on the bad side of people in power, which got less the older I got. Authorities still scare me though, but I find it easier to distinguish what will get me into trouble and what I can get away with. I guess I often act in a way that will make me appear harmless, like agreeing with people rather than disagreeing with them or acting like I have less knowledge than I do. If I can get people to like me, I won't have to be afraid of them. I’ve recently realized that I view most of people’s behaviour as an expression of their loyalties to things or people. Oh, and I can't deal with people who are blind optimists and go through their life seeing everything through rose-colored glasses.
Doubt: I don't feel like whole 'being devoted to something bigger than oneself' thing, being concerned with duty and rooting for the underdogs and stuff like that.
I don't have a lot to say about 8 and 7, but I'll go into them if anyone wants me to.
9: Since I was a child, I've always felt overlooked by others. I guess that it's been hard for me to know what I want, what's important to me and who I am since then. Adjusting to other people's needs comes natural to me and feels like the right thing do to, which is also why I will only express my views and needs subtly. If I'm afraid that something I'll do will endanger my relationship with someone, I probably won't do it. Comfort and harmony has always been priorities of mine, trying to be comfortable (physically, mentally and emotionally) often leads me to neglecting stuff or not doing it at all. Harmony is so important to me, that I won't get involved with people until I'm sure they'll like me and will agree with people, although I have a different opinion. I'm very indecisive, even in every-day situations. For example, I'll think about which kind of movie to watch for so long, that I end up not watching anything at all. Often I feel like I'm stuck in the position I am in now, it's hard for me to finish stuff and leave it behind me, but it's hard for me to figure out why.
Doubt: I don't have any problems with saying 'no' when others ask me for something I can't do / don't feel like doing. See anger.
Anger (I feel the need to adress this, haha): You could say I express my anger (like sadness and happiness usually) openly. People close to me tell me I get very stubborn and undiplomatic when I do, like slaming doors and trying to escape the situation. I'm never acting passive-agressive though, I always feel the need to make other people know how they make me feel. I also don't feel like I'm showing weakness like a 1 may feel like, it's just something that everyone goes through and I don't have to be ashamed of that.
I might go more into Fear and Shame later on.
I’d really, really like to know my MBTI type based on functions, but don’t know where to start. The questionnaires don’t really appeal to me and I don’t have enough confidence in my knowledge about the functions to just start writing about them. I'm also reluctant to describe images or stuff like that, because I can always see the various ways in which I could describe a picture and can never be sure what my own impression was and what wasn't. All I know is that I’m an introvert and it’ll be very hard to convince me otherwise, haha.
And then her best friend, who is an Si dom, asked her this question, "But what if you end up failing?" And the ENFP replied, "If I succeed, then good for me. But if I fail, then it's my destiny." 
I'm really considering ISFJ now, seems like the most realistic option. I mentioned this before, but if I type as ISFJ I'm nervous that people will expect me to be that SJ stereotype, like being organized, being able to remember a lot (like facts and birthdays) or being really reliable and dutiful, because I'm none of this stuff. Damn you Keirsey.
