Hello friends, I am brand new and this is my first post.
I have been interested in Myers Briggs since college (11 years ago.) I have consistently read articles about it, kept lists of each of my friends type, bothered people to take the test because it is one of my favorite ways of learning about the people in my life. After all of that time, though, I still waffle about what my type is. I am not an expert at all; I read mostly casual articles and still have a fairly limited view of functions and the deeper interactions. I hope you can help me!
For those who like the story:
As a teenager, I was pretty outgoing and was even the 'leader' in my friendships. I attracted weird, geeky people like me who I would help gain confidence and happiness by encouragement and pushing them to go on adventures with me (a definite trend in both my boyfriends and my friendships.) I had some bad things happen - one of my best friends was murdered when we were 17, and I was totally unexpectedly dumped after a 3 year relationship at 20. I took a MBTI test for the first time around then. I consistently tested INTJ for a few years, but in hindsight I think it might have been because I was unhappy and giving cold, misanthropic answers (no offense to INTJs; I find you all very sexy and even aspirational; my favorite fictional characters are almost always INTJs.)
After a while, I think as I became more healthy and more 'myself' again, I started testing as INTP. I have considered myself INTP for at least 5 years, now, mostly because of testing, without much of an understanding of functions. My degree is in English Literature and my favorite part of school was writing essays. I LOVED writing essays. I found such beauty of optimizing the dance of well-worded, interesting thesis statement, followed by many paragraphs of one piece of evidence each, wrapped up with a pretty bow in a conclusion. I ADORED critical theory and ate it up like manna from heaven; looking at literature through different lenses to find new truths. I also took philosophy as my minor; I love finding new ways to understand and categorize ethics, existence, everything. I was very close to going to law school, and did incredibly well on the LSAT - again, that pretty dance of formal argument, tenants, rebuttal. I love that stuff. I enjoy doing taxes, and I usually have more fun planning vacations than actually going on them. All of this to me seemed to indicate that I was indeed INTP.
In the last year or so, I have been questioning that. Although I have all of those qualities, they don't seem to be what DRIVES me, you know? I work from home as a seamstress but I don't lik ethe technical aspects of sewing - I like the sculptural ones. I am bored to tears by tailoring and formal techniques. I love beading, painting, dyeing, draping. I don't even accept commissions for sportswear or tailored looks because I know I don't have the patience to do the math and execute them well. I like sewing 100 miles an hour on my old 1970's machine in straight lines, and then putting beads and ruffles everywhere. I have even purposefully avoided learning proper techniques (I'm self-taught) out of independent, hipstery stubbornness. I would rather figure out how to do it my own way. That doesn't sound like INTP, does it? If I were INTP, shouldn't I enjoy the engineering, and the math, and learning the best techniques? I don't at all.
When I take cognitive function tests (results below) they seem to indicate INFP, yet when I read the 'You know you're an INFP when' forums I almost recoil in disgust at the amount of sensitivity and openness on display. They are also described as perfectionists, which I am not - "cover up the bad parts with embellishments" is pretty much my motto. INFP are supposed to be good listeners and put people at ease - I am anxious/fake in group situations, so I can't imagine that's true. So I continued to stick to INTP, thinking I was maybe just an exceptionally lazy (and/or dumb) INTP.
Then in the last week, after I took yet another cognitive function test, I realized that ENFP, a possibility I previously dismissed because of the 'E' - actually sits a lot better with me. Almost everything I read, I thought, 'YES!' I feel like the descriptions reached the deeper, more sacred parts of who I am. Passionate about new ideas, moving from one to another. Difficulty following through. Tendency to be gushy or insincere when socially nervous. Need for acceptance (from the few people who matter.) Overly sensitive to criticism. See details like cleaning as drudgery. HUGE need for independence, in myself and others. And the most important - although I view it as weak and pathetic, a deep, quiet part of me loves encouraging and transforming the people around me. As I mentioned in the very beginning, before my difficulties as a teenager, I tended to give all of my friends confidence and happiness. The boyfriend who left me when I was 20 started as a shy, quiet boy no one would look twice at, but by the time he dumped me, he was the lead of a popular band and one of the most popular guys at our school, confident, witty, handsome. No wonder he left me. My INFJ husband is a similar story - when we met he was an unhappy bartender who had given up on life, in a 5 year relationship with a woman who cheated on him constantly and wouldn't speak to him. (And he supported her full time.) Now he's a network engineer who has a good relationship with his family and friends again, and doesn't let people take advantage of him anymore. The best man at our wedding started crying when he talked about the change that had taken place in him since meeting me - it's not all in my head. Isn't that sort of encouragement at the heart of what an ENFP is?
The problem with ENFP is that I am the most introverted person I know. I am alone all day because I work from home, and still never want to leave the house. I moved across the country 8 years ago and have made a total one ONE new friend - and I met her through my husband's work. A quick glance through the ENFP forums saw an overabundance of exclamation points and emojis, which gross me out, and a lot of talk about stopping random people in the grocery store for a chat or getting into conversations on planes. NOPE. I pretend I'm asleep on planes and dress like a homeless person in public so everyone will leave me alone. I don't want new friends - they're a big commitment of time and energy.
The few people that I love, I love fiercely. I spend way too much time analyzing my husband and thinking about what I can do to make his life better. Whenever I splurge unwisely on some item, it's always for him. Just today I bought him a Feldrake mount for Warcraft, which I sent to him without even saying a word. He hasn't logged in yet and I am eagerly tittering with excitement for when he finds it in his mailbox. I read to him every night until he falls asleep. I put together elaborate riddle-driven, fantasy-themed treasure hunts that lead to a new board game; because we're unrepentant nostalgia kids and he loves it. I take really, really good care of him. It's hard for me to reconcile this with how I dismiss 99% of everyone as boring and spend no time on them, and hate most social situations - it seems I just prefer to spend all of my social energy on one person.
My best guess is that I am actually INFP or ENFP, but still vaguely unhealthy in that I haven't embraced my emotional side or people side (possibly as a result from the difficulties I experienced as a teenager) and stubbornly cling to Ti/Te, even though they aren't my strong point (I understand that there is only one of the two in my functions, but my test result and understanding is murky, so I'm not sure which it is. Te, if I had to guess, as I'm pretty erratic, excitable, and interrupt-y when thinking aloud.) Can you be an emotion-denying, emotion-disliking Fi user? Am I in denial about who I am? Fi seems to show up fairly strongly on my cognitive function tests, so maybe that's the case.
For those who like the facts:
Eldest child
ISTJ mother (don't get along with her well; I just tell her what she wants to hear to keep harmony)
ENFJ father (who I idolize and adore.)
INFJ husband (he is more intelligent than me, far more socially graceful than me, and an endless mystery. I adore him.)
ENTP long-distance best friend (we can talk for hours about anything in a safe space with no judgement; I love throwing ideas and jokes back and forth with him.)
ISTP local friend (she is very calm, accepting, and intelligent. I feel really safe around her and I don't get anxious like I do in most other social situations.)
9w1 Enneagram
Pretty sure of this; it really resonates with me. I was the mediator in my parents' relationship, and in my friendships. I will sometimes literally run away from conflict and I melt into a pile of hot, awkward goo when someone tries to engage me in debate, because strong opinions in my face are so upsetting to me. Peace, quiet, and sound body/mind to pursue my interests is everything to me.
Turbulant over Assertive
Harry Potter House: Slytherclaw; I can never decide between Slytherin and Ravenclaw. I filled out one of those 20 page essay questionnaires in an old Sorting community on Livejournal, and the 200+ members voted me Slytherin by a slim margin. In truth and in hindsight I think I manipulated the test to say Slytherin, though.
Here are 3 cognitive functions tests, taken in the last 2 years, in different moods and in different "maybe I'm this type" mindsets (although I always try to be unbiased when I take the test.) The latest one is from today. This is from Keys2cognition.
Ne 45
Te 36.8
Fi 34.5
Ni 32.7
Ti 31.7
Si 26.5
Se 21.2
Fe 11.4
Ne 50.2
Ni 38.8
Fi 37.9
Ti 33.8
Te 30.8
Si 24.7
Fe 11.7
Se 11.5
Ni 42.6
Ne 41.8
Fi 32.7
Te 31.7
Ti 28.7
Si 25.7
Se 21.6
Fe 14.6
Thanks in advance, everyone. This post is pretty word-vomity and my functions tests are all over the place, so I don't have much hope, but I know if anybody can figure it out, it's you guys. MBTI means so much to me and I would like to be more certain what my type is.
I have been interested in Myers Briggs since college (11 years ago.) I have consistently read articles about it, kept lists of each of my friends type, bothered people to take the test because it is one of my favorite ways of learning about the people in my life. After all of that time, though, I still waffle about what my type is. I am not an expert at all; I read mostly casual articles and still have a fairly limited view of functions and the deeper interactions. I hope you can help me!
For those who like the story:
As a teenager, I was pretty outgoing and was even the 'leader' in my friendships. I attracted weird, geeky people like me who I would help gain confidence and happiness by encouragement and pushing them to go on adventures with me (a definite trend in both my boyfriends and my friendships.) I had some bad things happen - one of my best friends was murdered when we were 17, and I was totally unexpectedly dumped after a 3 year relationship at 20. I took a MBTI test for the first time around then. I consistently tested INTJ for a few years, but in hindsight I think it might have been because I was unhappy and giving cold, misanthropic answers (no offense to INTJs; I find you all very sexy and even aspirational; my favorite fictional characters are almost always INTJs.)
After a while, I think as I became more healthy and more 'myself' again, I started testing as INTP. I have considered myself INTP for at least 5 years, now, mostly because of testing, without much of an understanding of functions. My degree is in English Literature and my favorite part of school was writing essays. I LOVED writing essays. I found such beauty of optimizing the dance of well-worded, interesting thesis statement, followed by many paragraphs of one piece of evidence each, wrapped up with a pretty bow in a conclusion. I ADORED critical theory and ate it up like manna from heaven; looking at literature through different lenses to find new truths. I also took philosophy as my minor; I love finding new ways to understand and categorize ethics, existence, everything. I was very close to going to law school, and did incredibly well on the LSAT - again, that pretty dance of formal argument, tenants, rebuttal. I love that stuff. I enjoy doing taxes, and I usually have more fun planning vacations than actually going on them. All of this to me seemed to indicate that I was indeed INTP.
In the last year or so, I have been questioning that. Although I have all of those qualities, they don't seem to be what DRIVES me, you know? I work from home as a seamstress but I don't lik ethe technical aspects of sewing - I like the sculptural ones. I am bored to tears by tailoring and formal techniques. I love beading, painting, dyeing, draping. I don't even accept commissions for sportswear or tailored looks because I know I don't have the patience to do the math and execute them well. I like sewing 100 miles an hour on my old 1970's machine in straight lines, and then putting beads and ruffles everywhere. I have even purposefully avoided learning proper techniques (I'm self-taught) out of independent, hipstery stubbornness. I would rather figure out how to do it my own way. That doesn't sound like INTP, does it? If I were INTP, shouldn't I enjoy the engineering, and the math, and learning the best techniques? I don't at all.
When I take cognitive function tests (results below) they seem to indicate INFP, yet when I read the 'You know you're an INFP when' forums I almost recoil in disgust at the amount of sensitivity and openness on display. They are also described as perfectionists, which I am not - "cover up the bad parts with embellishments" is pretty much my motto. INFP are supposed to be good listeners and put people at ease - I am anxious/fake in group situations, so I can't imagine that's true. So I continued to stick to INTP, thinking I was maybe just an exceptionally lazy (and/or dumb) INTP.
Then in the last week, after I took yet another cognitive function test, I realized that ENFP, a possibility I previously dismissed because of the 'E' - actually sits a lot better with me. Almost everything I read, I thought, 'YES!' I feel like the descriptions reached the deeper, more sacred parts of who I am. Passionate about new ideas, moving from one to another. Difficulty following through. Tendency to be gushy or insincere when socially nervous. Need for acceptance (from the few people who matter.) Overly sensitive to criticism. See details like cleaning as drudgery. HUGE need for independence, in myself and others. And the most important - although I view it as weak and pathetic, a deep, quiet part of me loves encouraging and transforming the people around me. As I mentioned in the very beginning, before my difficulties as a teenager, I tended to give all of my friends confidence and happiness. The boyfriend who left me when I was 20 started as a shy, quiet boy no one would look twice at, but by the time he dumped me, he was the lead of a popular band and one of the most popular guys at our school, confident, witty, handsome. No wonder he left me. My INFJ husband is a similar story - when we met he was an unhappy bartender who had given up on life, in a 5 year relationship with a woman who cheated on him constantly and wouldn't speak to him. (And he supported her full time.) Now he's a network engineer who has a good relationship with his family and friends again, and doesn't let people take advantage of him anymore. The best man at our wedding started crying when he talked about the change that had taken place in him since meeting me - it's not all in my head. Isn't that sort of encouragement at the heart of what an ENFP is?
The problem with ENFP is that I am the most introverted person I know. I am alone all day because I work from home, and still never want to leave the house. I moved across the country 8 years ago and have made a total one ONE new friend - and I met her through my husband's work. A quick glance through the ENFP forums saw an overabundance of exclamation points and emojis, which gross me out, and a lot of talk about stopping random people in the grocery store for a chat or getting into conversations on planes. NOPE. I pretend I'm asleep on planes and dress like a homeless person in public so everyone will leave me alone. I don't want new friends - they're a big commitment of time and energy.
The few people that I love, I love fiercely. I spend way too much time analyzing my husband and thinking about what I can do to make his life better. Whenever I splurge unwisely on some item, it's always for him. Just today I bought him a Feldrake mount for Warcraft, which I sent to him without even saying a word. He hasn't logged in yet and I am eagerly tittering with excitement for when he finds it in his mailbox. I read to him every night until he falls asleep. I put together elaborate riddle-driven, fantasy-themed treasure hunts that lead to a new board game; because we're unrepentant nostalgia kids and he loves it. I take really, really good care of him. It's hard for me to reconcile this with how I dismiss 99% of everyone as boring and spend no time on them, and hate most social situations - it seems I just prefer to spend all of my social energy on one person.
My best guess is that I am actually INFP or ENFP, but still vaguely unhealthy in that I haven't embraced my emotional side or people side (possibly as a result from the difficulties I experienced as a teenager) and stubbornly cling to Ti/Te, even though they aren't my strong point (I understand that there is only one of the two in my functions, but my test result and understanding is murky, so I'm not sure which it is. Te, if I had to guess, as I'm pretty erratic, excitable, and interrupt-y when thinking aloud.) Can you be an emotion-denying, emotion-disliking Fi user? Am I in denial about who I am? Fi seems to show up fairly strongly on my cognitive function tests, so maybe that's the case.
For those who like the facts:
Eldest child
ISTJ mother (don't get along with her well; I just tell her what she wants to hear to keep harmony)
ENFJ father (who I idolize and adore.)
INFJ husband (he is more intelligent than me, far more socially graceful than me, and an endless mystery. I adore him.)
ENTP long-distance best friend (we can talk for hours about anything in a safe space with no judgement; I love throwing ideas and jokes back and forth with him.)
ISTP local friend (she is very calm, accepting, and intelligent. I feel really safe around her and I don't get anxious like I do in most other social situations.)
9w1 Enneagram
Pretty sure of this; it really resonates with me. I was the mediator in my parents' relationship, and in my friendships. I will sometimes literally run away from conflict and I melt into a pile of hot, awkward goo when someone tries to engage me in debate, because strong opinions in my face are so upsetting to me. Peace, quiet, and sound body/mind to pursue my interests is everything to me.
Turbulant over Assertive
Harry Potter House: Slytherclaw; I can never decide between Slytherin and Ravenclaw. I filled out one of those 20 page essay questionnaires in an old Sorting community on Livejournal, and the 200+ members voted me Slytherin by a slim margin. In truth and in hindsight I think I manipulated the test to say Slytherin, though.
Here are 3 cognitive functions tests, taken in the last 2 years, in different moods and in different "maybe I'm this type" mindsets (although I always try to be unbiased when I take the test.) The latest one is from today. This is from Keys2cognition.
Ne 45
Te 36.8
Fi 34.5
Ni 32.7
Ti 31.7
Si 26.5
Se 21.2
Fe 11.4
Ne 50.2
Ni 38.8
Fi 37.9
Ti 33.8
Te 30.8
Si 24.7
Fe 11.7
Se 11.5
Ni 42.6
Ne 41.8
Fi 32.7
Te 31.7
Ti 28.7
Si 25.7
Se 21.6
Fe 14.6
Thanks in advance, everyone. This post is pretty word-vomity and my functions tests are all over the place, so I don't have much hope, but I know if anybody can figure it out, it's you guys. MBTI means so much to me and I would like to be more certain what my type is.
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