I've lost my Head. Can someone help me find it? (Enneagram typing)

[Hawthorne]

Would anyone be willing to lend their eyes and help me figure out/verify my enneagram type?

I really don't like questionnaires. They make me very, very sad. I'd much rather share a little bit about myself, what I know about enneagram, and have you help me along because teamwork is beautiful.

Feeling through the motivations of the enneagram types, I have ruled out 2 as my heart/image/whatever center because to be loved and cherished isn't a chief concern of mine. I prefer positive attention but sometimes negative attention can be just as rewarding. I could actually see that being another side of 2... Anyway, I relate about equally to 3 and 4's needs for validation and personal significance respectively, though perhaps I'm more 3-like since I don't put much effort into defining and individuating myself anymore. Or so I think. I'm not the most introspective person.

The gut/body/whatever center is very interesting to me. I am fascinated by the underlying theme of anger which I may or may not relate to. Like 2, I have ruled out 1 because while I can be perfectionistic at times, I lack the compulsion for integrity, "goodness", and other synonyms for purity and justice that seem to be at the core of that type. Superficially, 8's distrust, resistance to being impressed upon, and proclivity for self-reliance resonates strongly with me. My understanding of 9 is more fickle. Actually, aside from fearing abandonment, I don't really understand it at all.

And lastly, the Head that I'm still trying to locate. The struggle is that I relate to all three types' motivations. Five's disconnect from the world and hunger for knowledge and mastery, Six's skepticism and struggle with trust and faith, and Seven's evasion of the darker corners of their psyche and compulsive pursuit of distractions. The funny thing about that Seven part is that while I'm not especially afraid of my metaphorical dark, I do have a tendency to runaway from my moments of vulnerability and weakness though that's start to sound more 8 like than 7.

This is getting long. Can someone respond and ask questions so I, I mean we, can talk more? Lack of responses would greatly hurt my feeling.

 

[BadOctopus]

Why do you feel that negative attention can be rewarding? Do you think it has a positive effect on you? Or is it more that you think even bad attention is better than no attention at all?

 

[Hawthorne]

Why do you feel that negative attention can be rewarding? Do you think it has a positive effect on you? Or is it more that you think even bad attention is better than no attention at all?

Because it's a reaction. Polite neutrality and silence doesn't give me anything to work with and leaves me confused and feeling alienated. Back-patting and ass-kissing can be contrived, boring, and thin.

Most people can't fake animosity. It's honest and reveals a lot about a person's mindset and way of thinking. Sometimes people need to be pushed to show that side of themselves and sometimes I'm willing to be the catalyst.

 

[Hawthorne]

Oh curses. Let's open this up to MBTI too. I'll do a questionaire anyway. I picked the least offensive one.

What is your MBTI and Enneagram Type?
"..."

What got you interested in Personality Type?
Wanting to figure out my deal. Chiefly, why I was struggling with basic life routines and responsibilities while everyone else seemed...more put together.

What kind of work do you do for a living?
Biomedical student first. Freelance data entry and transcriptionist second.

What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
I don't keep track of stuff like this. I don't care enough about them. I guess that full-ride scholarship was nice.

What would constitute a perfect day for you?
Wake up before sunrise. Workout. Do something productive. Study something fascinating. Watch something entertaining. Talk to someone interesting. Go to sleep.

What are you most grateful for in your life?
I don't think about stuff like this and my answer would basically amount to a list of first-world privileges.

Is there something that you've dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?
Because I have to play by some rules and jump through some hoops and follow somebody else's time schedule instead of going about things in the way that suits me best.

If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
Well, actually having close relationships would be nice. I also would've had my parents let me do more extracurriculars like music, sports, and various other clubs.

Share an embarrassing moment in your life.
Running a red light during my drivers test with a police officer in the passenger's seat.

Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? Why?
Yes because I constantly lose track of what I want to say so I have to make sure I know what I want to say before I say it or else I forget and have to start over which causes me to stumble and put pauses where they shouldn't be or forget to pause when I need to and not make sense sometimes, I guess.

If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?
Discipline.

What do you value most in a friendship?
Someone stimulating. Someone challenging but also really chill who I can discuss a variety of things with.

What is your most treasured memory?
Don't think keep track of stuff like this. Yeah, don't think I have one.

What roles do love and affection play in your life?
Honestly, I don't really know much about them. I genuinely can't think of anything I "love". Value, sure, but love? I'm affectionate with my pets.

Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
Probably my cellphone to call the fire department. I wouldn't go back into a fire for something sentimental.

Who would you want with you if you were stranded on a deserted island?
That best friend from the earlier question.

If you could do anything you wanted right now, what would it be?
Move to a bigger city. London seems cool.

If money was no object, what would you do all day?
Research interests. Take classes recreationally. Learn new skills.

Who is your favorite author?
Don't have a favorite.

What is your favorite book?
Don't have a favorite.

What has been your biggest challenge?
Finding a stability. Learning how to focus. Wanting to connect with others. Learning how to connect with others.

If you could go back in time, what year would you travel to?
Ew. Why would I go back in time?

What does your life say about you?
Lots of potential. Some of it wasted. Some still left but time is ticking.

How would your friends describe you?
I have issues with that word. Also, I don't have an answer because I don't have a single personality that show to others.

 

[Hawthorne]

No follow-up from [MENTION=23115]BadOctopus[/MENTION]. Okay.

Perhaps I should've posted this in the Enneagram subtopic.

Really, any information, hunches, questions, impressions, excuses would be appreciated. I don't have to have a "typing" per se. Some thoughts to springboard off of would be just as helpful.

 

[BadOctopus]

From your answers, you seem like an enneagram 7. And possibly an xSTP in MBTI. Do you feel particularly introverted or extroverted?

 

[Hawthorne]

From your answers, you seem like an enneagram 7. And possibly an xSTP in MBTI. Do you feel particularly introverted or extroverted?

Oh that's interesting. I don't have a strong preference either way. I think I'm perceiving dominant though so any of the ExxPs wouldn't surprise me. The IxxJs on the other hand...

Unlikely.

Why E7?

I'll also take the credit hit and ask why TP over FP?

 

[BlackCat]

To me, I get this vibe stuck between 7w8 and 9w8. Maybe you should read up on those types and see what you think? Naranjo's work really sealed the deal for me on my type.

 

[Hawthorne]

To me, I get this vibe stuck between 7w8 and 9w8. Maybe you should read up on those types and see what you think? Naranjo's work really sealed the deal for me on my type.

Interesting. I'm used to getting 7w8 but never 9w8.

Like I mentioned, I don't really understand 9 that well. I've skimmed Naranjo and 9's fear seems to be abandonment and/or losing something important which can result in neglecting their own thoughts and desires so as not to be offensive or alienating. I'm even less certain how the Eight wing would affect that motivation.

If the above is somewhat accurate then I doubt I'm a 9 considering my own tendency to abandon people or things that aren't worth holding on to. I also don't relate to "eating" my thoughts and opinions in order to avoid criticism or ostracism though I try to stay tactful. I'm more likely to (over)share and regret it later tbh.

 

[Mademoiselle]

That's not how it works.

*slaps you*
..now, tell mw the fu** is worng with you?

 

[Hawthorne]

*slaps you*
..now, tell mw the fu** is worng with you?

Are you asking for a list?

That's not how it works.

( ._.)
Well, how does it work then?

 

[Mademoiselle]

Are you asking for a list?


( ._.)
Well, how does it work then?

I asked you what's your problem?

 

[Hawthorne]

I asked you what's your problem?

Implying that I only have one? >.>

 

[BadOctopus]

I asked you what's your problem?

I might ask the same thing. The disrespect you're showing is unwarranted, not to mention incomprehensible.

Or are you joking?

 

[Mademoiselle]

Implying that I only have one? >.>

Can you simply answer my questions?
And.. what is that problem that you have?

I might ask the same thing. The disrespect you're showing is unwarranted, not to mention incomprehensible.

Or are you joking?

This thread is no joke.

 

[Hawthorne]

Can you simply answer my questions?

Depends.

Can I expect some clarification or typing help? My compliance is a scarce resource so I'm a little stingy. You understand, yes?

If so, ask a more specific question.

 

[Mademoiselle]

Depends.

Can I expect some clarification or typing help? My compliance is a scarce resource so I'm a little stingy. You understand, yes?

If so, ask a more specific question.

You don't have to do questionaries to determine your type it's kinda slow
And I'm obviously here helping you to find out your type, so if you please answer my question, without asking me questions.

 

[Hawthorne]

You don't have to do questionaries to determine your type it's kinda slow
And I'm obviously here helping you to find out your type, so if you please answer my question, without asking me questions.

Was looking for a token of good will, I suppose.

It is difficult to answer a question without having a clue of its nature. I am questioning whether the purpose of this is to lead me on a free-association ramble, if it's a humorous Head game (which the title suggests I'm ill-equipped to play), or just some kind of miscommunication. Guess it doesn't have to be either-or.

If you're still asking about my problem(s) then I don't have an answer and I don't think I'll have one until I better understand the intent of the question.

So it looks like we're stuck. :/

 

[Mademoiselle]

Was looking for a token of good will, I suppose.

It is difficult to answer a question without having a clue of its nature. I am questioning whether the purpose of this is to lead me on a free-association ramble, if it's a humorous Head game (which the title suggests I'm ill-equipped to play), or just some kind of miscommunication. Guess it doesn't have to be either-or.

If you're still asking about my problem(s) then I don't have an answer and I don't think I'll have one until I better understand the intent of the question.

So it looks like we're stuck. :/

So far you seem to be either 4,6,7 but I need to know more about how healthy you are.

So current problems, lemme give you few options, is it about a relationship hat you can't deal with
Career/education, inner issues like lack of comfident.

Can't you think of something you've got to fix? Or you're okay with everything?

 

[Hawthorne]

So far you seem to be either 4,6,7 but I need to know more about how healthy you are.

So current problems, lemme give you few options, is it about a relationship hat you can't deal with
Career/education, inner issues like lack of comfident.

Can't you think of something you've got to fix? Or you're okay with everything?

Less of a specific problem and more of a overarching life one. Persistent discontent is the only way I can describe it. Dissatisfaction with most of my endeavors. Unable to attach and invest myself in anything resulting in my feeling like I've accomplished too little. Too easily bored and disinterested. Too quick to purge items, people, and opportunities and move on. To the point that it's affecting most spheres of my life. Educational, professional, social, etc.

I'm desperately seeking some kind of inspiration. Something that feels "real" and isn't easy to devalue and dismiss compulsively.

If I can pretend for a moment that it's not an overly burdened concept, I'm looking for something to "love" in sense that motivates me to commit and be constructive instead of straddling the intersection of "must do", "want to care", and "but doesn't really matter in the end".

Hopefully this make sense and is useful. I have a habit of being too vague which gets especially bad when talking about anything feelz(tm).