Now confused about enneagram type

[Ida]

Just appealed last week for mbti typing help and now that I have (tentatively) settled on enfj, I find myself reconsidering my enneagram type. It is truly open at this point - no type is off the table. I've considered myself a Type 1because that's the way I feel now - critical, discerning, somewhat negative, idealistic... But the core has never matched, and when I look back on my life pre-25 (I'm 35 now), I don't see any evidence of Oneishness. Instead of listing attributes that could pull in different directions, I just want to include the one repeating theme throughout my life and see what fits best with that.

For as long as I can remember, I've been the one who came up with the "grand schemes." I could always imagine what life would be like in a different place or with a different career. I could articulate these dreams to people I was close to and get them on board. If they changed their minds about going along with me, I would lash out and feel betrayed. I've lost a few close friends that way. I have a hard time seeing other peolple's needs and destinies being independent from my plans without taking it personally. I become jealous pretty easily. Some of my dreams have been realized, others abandoned.

Could this fit any enneagram type? Feel free to ask questions if you need more information. Thanks.

 

[Mal12345]

4w3

 

[Ida]

4 is one of the few types I've never really considered - I just don't really relate to the core motivation or any of the stereotypes/type descriptions. At this point, I won't rule anything out though... I will read the description more closely. What makes you say 4w3?

In the past, I've considered 6, 8 and 1, and to a lesser extent, 9. I don't relate to the type descriptions of 7 at all, but I do have the tendency to get excited about one plan or another which has made me wonder about the possibility of being a really atypical Type 7. The tests usually give me a pretty high score on Type 5, but I'm quite sure that's not my type (although, I did think 6w5 for a while). Never really related to anything in the feeling triad, even though I have little bits and pieces of types 2, 3, and 4 that ring true. Also, not that this is particularly relevant, but I'm not as sold on my mbti type either. Could be enfp, or something else entirely. Ah well. I don't have anything invested in this - it would just be fun to know.

 

[á´…eparted]

What you described doesn't really speak much towards any one enneagram, it could apply to many. The closest might be 3, but with so little to go off of I hesitate to say that or suggest it.

I'm an ENFJ 1w2 and I am very very certain of my type so I might be of some use if you're trying to determine if you're those. One of the biggest hallmarks of 1's is doing the right thing, being the right thing, and holding others to doing the right thing as much as possible. "Correctness" is the word that sums it all up nicely. E6 and E1 can very often get confused, and people have suggested I might be E6 in the past because I can get rather anxious. However, E6's hallmark is "distrust" which E1's don't always have.

 

[Ida]

Yes, thank you for the offer of help. Right now, I'm leaning more toward enfp rather than enfj. The functions fit much better that way.

As for enneagram type, I think I've figured out that my tritype has a 1, a 4 and 7 in it, but I don't know the core type or order. Here are the arguments for each:

1 (probably 1w9):

-critical
-discerning
-idealistic
-frustrated
-belief that things could be better
-can be negative/pessimistic
-have strong opinions on things and how things should be

But...

-disorganized
-have a lazy streak
-more casual than orderly
-don't love structured environments or schedules
-not good with money
-don't really relate to key motivation
-don't know that the oneish traits were always there

4 (probably 4w3):

-very fantasy prone
-daydream very often
-introspective
-can always imagine something better/more ideal circumstances
-can be jealous and envious
-want to have very deep connections to a few select people
-easily feel betrayed

But...

-don't go out of my way to be unique
-not at all artistic
-not elitist (at least not about most things)
-don't enjoy wallowing in negative emotions

7 (don't know the wing... Maybe balanced?)

-get very excited about future plans
-can be lazy in execution of plans
-playful and have silly streak
-love ideas, not as good with follow through
-would prefer to distract myself rather than deal with negative emotions

But...

-not an experience junkie
-have a decent amount of self discipline
-not a hedonist
-don't have commitment issues
-not as extraverted
-take life more seriously

 

[Ida]

As for the E1 vs E6, I've definitely seen characteristics of both in me; I can relate to the devils advocate descriptions of type 6 as well as some doubting and distrust, but I don't have the same ambivalence toward authority. Usually instead of either complying with or rebelling against rules, I just don't even know the rules. I lack the awareness that precedes the acceptance or rejection. That is one reason I've even wondered about E9.