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Am I an ENFP?

Steer2Justice

New member
Joined
Aug 12, 2008
Messages
28
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
There are some days where I totally feel like the person in the above picture...

And other days where I totally feel like the person diving into a chasm of hell. Hah. :D
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
784
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
agree with the other enfp girlies. definitely seem enfp to me yep. the other day i had an isfp describe me as really sweet and soft spoken. she thinks i'm quiet. i am, i guess but i also know i can get all crazy with some extroverts...depends on the company and what we're doing i suppose. i'm am sx dom social last too.

welcome to the forum! you feel like good company. :)
 

Steer2Justice

New member
Joined
Aug 12, 2008
Messages
28
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
agree with the other enfp girlies. definitely seem enfp to me yep. the other day i had an isfp describe me as really sweet and soft spoken. she thinks i'm quiet. i am, i guess but i also know i can get all crazy with some extroverts...depends on the company and what we're doing i suppose. i'm am sx dom social last too.

welcome to the forum! you feel like good company. :)

Hahaha thank you very much! I think we're generally quiet until we get a feel for the person (which for me takes either a few seconds or forever) and then we start feeling comfortable and talking to them. Hahah I totally agree. A lot of things in the world, especially interaction, seem to hinge on many variables that it's almost impossible to give a concrete definite answer?

I'm not sure about my instinctual type now though. I'm very certain I'm sexual first but I went to take a quiz and I'm sexual, social and then self-preserving in that order...

Thank you! You seem nice too.
 

Honor

girl with a pretty smile
Joined
Jul 11, 2012
Messages
1,580
MBTI Type
?
Instinctual Variant
so
sounds like you're an sx-dom (enneagram stuff), and probably social last. i'm the same way, and feel socially awkward too. in social situations, i'm always scanning for my person or people who i can connect with, go off and talk about the realness with. it's all about going deep with us. and we're easily bored by the "real world". if i don't find someone to connect with, i usually just end up off in my own head. look up "instinctual variants" if you get the chance. i'll try to link you to a good resource [MENTION=17131]Chanaynay[/MENTION] gave me when i was trying to find mine.

Fi doesn't help our social graces either. it's weird because it's like Ne gives us the signal that we *should* be socially cautious, say the right thing, whatever. but we lack the ability to do it. Fi just wants to like speak truth to people and can't fully do the "say the right thing" thing as well as our Fe brothers and sisters. if you're soc-last, then it probably amplifies that even more. we just can't be bothered, and wouldn't know where to start even if we wanted to.

i get really formal and rigid when i'm trying to be socially acceptable too. it's an awful feeling.

having an introvert tell you you seem introverted is what i mean by absorbing energy and putting it out. i have had an introvert tell me they thought i was introverted before too actually, simply because when i interact with him i kind of adjust to his energy level subconsciously.

as for your INFJ, my guess is that there's a wall up between you that hasn't been broken down yet. i'd bet if the situation came up where you were both open and willing to kind of dive into each other, you'd be able to get along much better. or maybe that particular INFJ and you don't have a lot in common. but in my experience Ni/Ne is a great connection. Ni tends to be guarded closely and hard to access sometimes though.

hope this is helpful. sorry for framing it in "me" terms. just putting out what i can relate to in your posts, so you can take or leave whatever is relevant to you.

no matter what your type, welcome! glad you're here. i appreciate your honest, reflective nature already.
what is the realness, nicolita? i've heard you refer to that before.
 

five sounds

MyPeeSmellsLikeCoffee247
Joined
Jul 17, 2013
Messages
5,393
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
729
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
what is the realness, nicolita? i've heard you refer to that before.


 

Steer2Justice

New member
Joined
Aug 12, 2008
Messages
28
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
aww, nicolita! that just melted me a little bit.

I'm so glad that a thread I opened saw this amazing work of brilliance.

I think you just made my day/night/whatever.
 

Honor

girl with a pretty smile
Joined
Jul 11, 2012
Messages
1,580
MBTI Type
?
Instinctual Variant
so
I'm so glad that a thread I opened saw this amazing work of brilliance.

I think you just made my day/night/whatever.
Haha! Sorry I kinda derailed your thread, Steer2Justice. I agree with all the ENFPs that you seem ENFP :)
 

Steer2Justice

New member
Joined
Aug 12, 2008
Messages
28
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Haha! Sorry I kinda derailed your thread, Steer2Justice. I agree with all the ENFPs that you seem ENFP :)

No, it's perfectly fine! After all you brought out that amazing song, no? If this is considered "derailment" then by all means derail away! :D
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
784
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
what is the realness, nicolita? i've heard you refer to that before.

i so get miss nicolita so much. that whole post feels like i wrote it. :laugh:

if i were to say it i would mean...just completely you...stripped down and raw with only the real bits exposed...none of this what you're supposed to say...who you're supposed to be...living up to any sort of image or role...just you..just two peoples minds without everything layered on top of it that so often clouds things. no judgement just relating mind to mind soul to soul or whatever.
 

Honor

girl with a pretty smile
Joined
Jul 11, 2012
Messages
1,580
MBTI Type
?
Instinctual Variant
so
i so get miss nicolita so much. that whole post feels like i wrote it. :laugh:

if i were to say it i would mean...just completely you...stripped down and raw with only the real bits exposed...none of this what you're supposed to say...who you're supposed to be...living up to any sort of image or role...just you..just two peoples minds without everything layered on top of it that so often clouds things. no judgement just relating mind to mind soul to soul or whatever.
You guys do seem to have a lot in common! I always thought it was because you have the MBTI types, enneagram types, instinctual variants, etc. Y'all are twinsies. Okay! Gotcha, because I interpreted it to mean like...forget about capitalism, jobs, and conforming. What is life really about? It's really about relationships, identity, nature, etc. Something like that. (And it doesn't seem like I was that far off point.)
 

Stephano

Almöhi
Joined
Aug 8, 2012
Messages
1,105
MBTI Type
NFP
OH MAN I totally missed your post I did not mean to ignore you oh god.I thought I was an XNFP too, actually. It could make sense. I could be a type 6 indeed but somehow I seem to identify more strongly with type 4...? But then again I can't be sure since I thought I was type 3 for a good part of my life.

Haha, nevermind. :D Have you considered 9 already?
 

Steer2Justice

New member
Joined
Aug 12, 2008
Messages
28
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
i so get miss nicolita so much. that whole post feels like i wrote it. :laugh:

if i were to say it i would mean...just completely you...stripped down and raw with only the real bits exposed...none of this what you're supposed to say...who you're supposed to be...living up to any sort of image or role...just you..just two peoples minds without everything layered on top of it that so often clouds things. no judgement just relating mind to mind soul to soul or whatever.

I absolutely agree. I think it's a wondrous thing to have two people that can be completely honest and truthful with one another. No need for any facade or pretension to satisfy societal demands of what is deemed "socially acceptable" or otherwise and just allowing yourself to be lost in your partner/friend/whoever's eyes and mind and heart... I think that's quite possibly sheer bliss. I think people don't do that enough because they're scared and because they've been overtly conditioned by society to be appropriate. It's not easy finding such intimacy and your heart can so easily be broken and shattered into a thousand pieces if it goes wrong.

Haha, nevermind. :D Have you considered 9 already?

As I recall, I don't think 9's very high on the list. I think it was 4, 3 and 6 in that order but I can't be too sure. I could go take the test again just for kicks though...

Oh. How d'you differentiate an ENFP sx and an ENFP sx/so? I took the quiz and it seems to say that I'm sx/so but I don't know if I'm fully convinced.
 

five sounds

MyPeeSmellsLikeCoffee247
Joined
Jul 17, 2013
Messages
5,393
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
729
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I absolutely agree. I think it's a wondrous thing to have two people that can be completely honest and truthful with one another. No need for any facade or pretension to satisfy societal demands of what is deemed "socially acceptable" or otherwise and just allowing yourself to be lost in your partner/friend/whoever's eyes and mind and heart... I think that's quite possibly sheer bliss. I think people don't do that enough because they're scared and because they've been overtly conditioned by society to be appropriate. It's not easy finding such intimacy and your heart can so easily be broken and shattered into a thousand pieces if it goes wrong.

word.

Oh. How d'you differentiate an ENFP sx and an ENFP sx/so? I took the quiz and it seems to say that I'm sx/so but I don't know if I'm fully convinced.

sx/so - excluding, eliminating, dividing, separating, contradicting, subverting, confronting, rebuffing, ridiculing, challenging, interrupting, reforming, rupturing

sx/sp - intensifying, escalating, rising, surging, enlivening, invigorating, accelerating, stimulating, energizing, vitalizing, reviving, animating, inspiriting


reading those descriptions helped me decide between sx/sp and sx/so. i was sure i was sx first too, and wasn't sure which one was second for me. hopefully one of those lists strikes more of a chord with you than the other.
 

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
word.



sx/so - excluding, eliminating, dividing, separating, contradicting, subverting, confronting, rebuffing, ridiculing, challenging, interrupting, reforming, rupturing

sx/sp - intensifying, escalating, rising, surging, enlivening, invigorating, accelerating, stimulating, energizing, vitalizing, reviving, animating, inspiriting


reading those descriptions helped me decide between sx/sp and sx/so. i was sure i was sx first too, and wasn't sure which one was second for me. hopefully one of those lists strikes more of a chord with you than the other.


I still maintain Im sx-sp according to that thing. And I aint *NO* sp-aux. If you follow that description, I'm the combination of so-sx and sx-sp.
 

five sounds

MyPeeSmellsLikeCoffee247
Joined
Jul 17, 2013
Messages
5,393
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
729
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I still maintain Im sx-sp according to that thing. And I aint *NO* sp-aux. If you follow that description, I'm the combination of so-sx and sx-sp.

iiiinteresante. how do you feel about these descriptions:
 

HongDou

navigating
Joined
Nov 23, 2012
Messages
5,191
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
Oh. How d'you differentiate an ENFP sx and an ENFP sx/so? I took the quiz and it seems to say that I'm sx/so but I don't know if I'm fully convinced.

If you're certain about being sx-first, then your first priority/worry would be chemistry with other people and your surroundings, intensity, and finding something to "complete" yourself. If you're so-second then you have a fairly good understanding of the social realm around you, a desire to make interconnections with other individuals in that social realm, etc. That means you're sp-last, meaning you tend to disregard your own physical safety, comfort, potential risks, and well-being (for example, I tend to forget to eat dinner and get proper hours of sleep). If sp and so are flipped, then you have a good grip on maintaining your personal safety and comfort/health but you tend to disregard how your actions affect the social realm around you and you may sometimes be forget to maintain to the connections you already have.

Basically how I look at it is:

first instinct = too much and it can create problems
second instinct = just right, you have a healthy amount of it
last instinct = too little and it can get you in trouble

Also I didn't read all your posts (I'm an E7 after all) but you certainly vibe like an ENFP and have the stream-of-consciousness writing style :)
 

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
iiiinteresante. how do you feel about these descriptions:

Second one, hands down. I relate to some parts of the first, but like 90 percent of the second one.

Maybe its just that i don't vibe with the emotional load of the words used to describe sx-so in that thing of yours, but I *really* don't see how those words can overlap with that second description you just gave me :shrug:

I find that sx-sps are more likely to be that way due to their need for space and focus on their self (sp tends to look at themselves, so to others, sx between two people). I can sort of see it for a person who plays social games, perhaps? Who is competitive? But you'd expect that kind of behaviour from an so-dom, considering that the dominant is more likely to go overboard like that on gaming. Or maybe i just aint interpreting that piece of info right :thinking:
 

HongDou

navigating
Joined
Nov 23, 2012
Messages
5,191
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
Maybe its just that i don't vibe with the emotional load of the words used to describe sx-so in that thing of yours, but I *really* don't see how those words can overlap with that second description you just gave me :shrug:

I find that sx-sps are more likely to be that way due to their need for space and focus on their self (sp tends to look at themselves, so to others, sx between two people). I can sort of see it for a person who plays social games, perhaps? Who is competitive? But you'd expect that kind of behaviour from an so-dom, considering that the dominant is more likely to go overboard like that on gaming. Or maybe i just aint interpreting that piece of info right :thinking:

I think, to be honest, the words used to describe sx/so in that initial post isn't very flattering to them - although it isn't really flattering to any contra-flow type except maybe so/sp. But I think what those words are implying is that, sx/so is a generally high energy type in the first place so it does cause a lot of social rupturing and, for lack of a better word, reactivity. In the midst of that eruption sx/so will find the people worth keeping and connecting to. Think back to our exchange about the "mom" thing. :newwink: Theoretically so/sx may have been a little more playful with the nicknames/name-calling while sx/so was more inclined to challenge (challenging is also a word in that list I think) that and that act of confronting could potentially scare away the people not worth connecting with or the people you don't have the right chemistry with. That's my take on it anyway. :thinking:
 

HongDou

navigating
Joined
Nov 23, 2012
Messages
5,191
MBTI Type
ENFP
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6w7
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
Also [MENTION=4817]Steer2Justice[/MENTION] this may help:

Naranjo said:
Naranjo explains that the three Fours represent three different approaches to the neurotic need to suffer. SO Fours suffer, SP Fours are long-suffering, and SX Fours make others suffer.

The SP Four is someone who does not suffer out loud, does not complain, is relatively autonomous, and who makes a virtue out of enduring pain without wincing. These Fours are tougher Fours, more masochistic than melodramatic. These are also Oneish Fours – stoic, austere, and self-disciplined individuals who challenge themselves to achieve rather than engage in longing. (This is the countertype. I’ve encountered many people who say they can’t find their Enneagram type who end up being SP Fours.)

The SO Four is emotionally sensitive and feels things deeply. They lament frequently and tend to take on the victim role. In contrast to the SX Four, the SO Four is not competitive, though they often compare themselves to others and find themselves lacking. For the SO Four, there is a need for self-abasement and self-recrimination. It’s as if you want to ask them, “What’s wrong with you that you think there’s something wrong with you?”

The SX Four is more assertive than the SO Four. Whereas the SO Four feels a great deal of shame, the SX Four is shameless. These Fours can be very outspoken with their anger, and they are very competitive. They express envious anger, an envy that manifests as competition. In addition, the SX Four tends to be more vocal about expressing needs, and they rebel against any shame they may feel is related to their desires.

Maitri said:
Sexual 4: Competition/ Hate
Sexual Fours compete with others of their own sex in their attempt to find love. Their competitiveness is based n a sense that love is scarce and so it needs to be fought for. They try to convince their rivals and the object of their affection that they are better than the competition, and their wish to "disappear" their challengers is a form of hatred. The choice of object of desire is determined by how many other people want that person, so that, too, arises out of competition. Sexual Fours are not only competitive in the relationship arena - competition is their dominant behavioral characteristic - but it is there that it is most pronounced. The passion of envy manifests here as wanting someone another has or desires and in their underlying hatred of their rivals.

Self-Preservation 4: Dauntlessness
The term given by Ichazo for Self-preservation Fours is defensive action, as opposed to dauntlessness, which Naranjo associated with this subtype. Ichazo, quoted by John Lilly and Joseph Hart, defines defensive action as "protecting one's dream of the future." Rather than be limited by their circumstances, they wil rashly go after what they want and feel that they must have to survive. They take action to preserve themselves but do not consider the consequences, and actually put their survival in peril. A Self-preservation Four might, for instance, buy herself all sorts of beautiful things that she feels she can't live without, and end up sliding deeply into debt. Or, feeling unable to bear the constraints of a boring job, she might throw caution to the wind and on the spur of the moment buy herself a ticket to some exotic island. The passion of envy manifests here as wanting the security and material gratificatons others seem to possess, and recklessly striking out to get them.

Social 4: Shame
Social Fours have the notion that there is a right way to be, and they are perpetually ashamed because they are not that way. They have a fundamental sense of not fitting in and not being able to do things properly in order to fit in. Social Fours tend to be formal and a bit stiff, paying a lot of attention to their manners. Behaving properly is very important to them, since it is an attempt to cover their deeper sense of social inadequacy. Others appear to Social Fours to match the standard they have for themselves, and so they experience the passion of envy toward them and turn their hatred toward themselves in the form of shame.
 
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