I or E? (maybe J or P)

[psyche]

I've asked this here before, but briefly and a long time ago.

I cannot tell if I'm an I or E. I never type consistently; usually I fall in the middle or slightly toward I (though I've typed as E before). My most recent Humanmetrics test was I (33%).

I can't tell the difference in these. I'd say I'm more of an E than I, but some of the criteria for I fit me perfectly.

Also, I'm pretty sure I'm J, but when it comes to making plans to meet friends I pretty much never do this because I feel trapped and always want to change my mind at the last minute. Other than the plans with friends thing, I fit J to a tee.

Any help would be much appreciated. Thanks!

 

[VagrantFarce]

Don't confuse extroverted with "gregarious" and introverted with "quiet and shy" - easy mistake.

Basically, introverts find it easier to reflect and sit within themselves, whereas extroverts find it easier to interact with the world. The difference most notably manifests itself in people who lack confidence in themselves (again, don't confuse confidence with assertiveness):

Introverts, when lacking confidence in themselves, might find it harder to deal with the exterior world. Their first instinct may be to withdraw or become less assertive, preferring to stick to what they know or just remaining inside themselves. Extroverts, when lacking confidence in themselves, go in the opposite direction - their first instinct may be to make their presence known even more, unable to trust in their own ability to stand still and reflect. Not an absolute rule, and this lack of confidence manifests itself differently depending on the type, but hopefully you get the idea.

 

[Glycerine]

ENFJ, no doubt. You are reading way too much into the details. It's about the best fit.

 

[VagrantFarce]

ENFJ, no doubt. You are reading way too much into the details. It's about the best fit.

Oh honestly, ENFJs are the only ones who obsessively read into tiny details? Let's not get carried away with ourselves here.

 

[psyche]

Don't confuse extroverted with "gregarious" and introverted with "quiet and shy" - easy mistake.

Basically, introverts find it easier to reflect and sit within themselves, whereas extroverts find it easier to interact with the world. The difference most notably manifests itself in people who lack confidence in themselves (again, don't confuse confidence with assertiveness):

Introverts, when lacking confidence in themselves, might find it harder to deal with the exterior world. Their first instinct may be to withdraw or become less assertive, preferring to stick to what they know or just remaining inside themselves. Extroverts, when lacking confidence in themselves, go in the opposite direction - their first instinct may be to make their presence known even more, unable to trust in their own ability to stand still and reflect. Not an absolute rule, and this lack of confidence manifests itself differently depending on the type, but hopefully you get the idea.

That's just it. I have both. I would say that when I lack confidence, I definitely withdraw. Or at least I feel withdrawn internally, even if I don't show it on the outside.

In the Enneagram I'm a 4w3 and I feel that my 4 is withdrawn and introspective (I spend lots and lots of time pondering life's mysteries and exploring my feelings -- for example, I find myself often thinking about the meaning of life, and focusing on my feelings and wondering about them) and my 3 is out there and extraverted. It's so confusing that I've never been able to figure it out. The NF is so clear to me, but this part is just really tough.

Another thing is that I feel extremely drained after I either facilitate a group discussion or give a presentation. But I don't know if it's all the people contact or the J in me that makes me want to be professional and do a good job so I'm hypervigilant about it.

 

[Glycerine]

Do you get energized by being around people you like or do you still get drained after being around them for awhile?

 

[psyche]

Do you get energized by being around people you like or do you still get drained after being around them for awhile?

That's an interesting question. I'm not drained by my very close friends (a small handful of them) or my immediate family. I'm drained by everyone else, to a greater or lesser degree, if the interaction is not brief (though the conversations are rarely superficial). I talk to a lot of people often, but more in passing th I talk on the phone a lot, but only to about five people that I'm close to. Otherwise, I screen my calls and set an appointment to talk because I know it'll be draining.

 

[Glycerine]

You sound like a really low e from that response.

 

[VagrantFarce]

That's just it. I have both. I would say that when I lack confidence, I definitely withdraw. Or at least I feel withdrawn internally, even if I don't show it on the outside.

In the Enneagram I'm a 4w3 and I feel that my 4 is withdrawn and introspective (I spend lots and lots of time pondering life's mysteries and exploring my feelings -- for example, I find myself often thinking about the meaning of life, and focusing on my feelings and wondering about them) and my 3 is out there and extraverted. It's so confusing that I've never been able to figure it out. The NF is so clear to me, but this part is just really tough.

Another thing is that I feel extremely drained after I either facilitate a group discussion or give a presentation. But I don't know if it's all the people contact or the J in me that makes me want to be professional and do a good job so I'm hypervigilant about it.

Everyone has an introverted and extraverted side - the point is which side you feel more comfortable with. Which could you do without, if only for a short time?

My boss is extraverted, yet his job involves a lot of intense thinking and doing a lot of work on his own. After a long day of coding, you can tell he's looking to re-energise and does what he's more comfortable with i.e. sparking a conversation, interacting with people etc. I'm the opposite -I'm far more comfortable just getting on with my work on my own than I am sparking and holding conversations with everyone. So I can attest to there being a definite difference between the two.

 

[Glycerine]

Everyone has an introverted and extraverted side - the point is which side you feel more comfortable with. Which could you do without, if only for a short time?

My boss is extraverted, yet his job involves a lot of intense thinking and doing a lot of work on his own. After a long day of coding, you can tell he's looking to re-energise and does what he's more comfortable with i.e. sparking a conversation, interacting with people etc. I'm the opposite -I'm far more comfortable just getting on with my work on my own than I am sparking and holding conversations with everyone. So I can attest to there being a definite difference between the two.

haha, that about sums it up. The more tired I am, the more I talk. However, this isn't really a rule of thumb, my ESFJ dad is the complete opposite. Another thing about E/I is how the person processes info most of the time. If you process info mostly through talking, you most likely are an E. If you process info mostly internally, you are most likely an I.

 

[psyche]

Thanks for all your responses.

I guess I'm an E, but right on the line, from how you describe the difference. Or, I go between E and I off and on throughout the day or week. I guess the fact that I'm so close to the line is why it's so hard for me to wrap my brain around the difference.