Let's jump to the meat of the matter, then.

[MayFlowers]

No introduction (frankly I'm surprised at myself, I'm usually really quite inflexible about introductory forums). No, I get to tell you about exactly how screwy I am, and how this works (or rather doesn't). At least after a three hour Google marathon about what the heck this socionics thing is.

To start off? "I'm seventeen and I'm crazy. My uncle says the two always go together. When people ask your age, he said, always say seventeen and insane" (said Clarisse to Montag in Farenheit 451). Also, with an impressive but about two-thirds useless amount of intrapersonal intelligence, the test notes. Impossible memory that stores every single fact imaginable and as little emotional memory as is possible.

Enneagram says: 5w6, extreme self-preservation instinct with the other two all but nonexistent. No questions there.

Or then again possibly I'm an extreme P-type raised by parents who wanted an extreme J-type who simply got things done without input. Yeah, I'll get things done if you carefully describe them to me, but if you don't give me any parameters I'll be terribly anxious about whether it actually meets your implicit standards or not, so maybe it won't get done. "Clean your room"? What does that entail? And why oh why is everyone so obsessed with it? It's wasting energy cleaning up entropy that's just going to build up again! (Timeout. Okay, sure. Then I can spend another hour dreaming about electrical circuits or the inner structure of leaves without you hollering at me for it.)

And again the psych says Asperger's and depression and anxiety. Yes, I am on antidepressants. It keeps my Ti from wasting too much time alternating between arguing with my subconscious and rationalizing what the subconscious says, aka it reduces my anxiety. But then again, my id hates me, because it is my parents' voice, and when your subconscious is the one manning all the switches, it can and will make life horrible for you if it doesn't like you (the conscious you, that is).

When I'm writing, my Ti will bounce things off Fi, and Ti then funnels it onto paper. My external functions are barely even visible, let alone developed. I've always tested as INFP, because I'm very sensitive to those I am close to, but it's never quite sat as well as the T. Fi's developed, very strong morals, and Ti's developed (overdeveloped more like), (decisions made by Fi and Ti bouncing off each other), but I don't really identify with Ne, but rather with Fe. But how does that happen...?

The reasonable conclusion is that I don't fit into the MBTI general types, and yet I'm still looking to fit into them!

 

[MayFlowers]

bump?

I tend to test as INFP. I use Ti with the outside world, though. It was the first to develop in fact.

 

[VagrantFarce]

Impossible memory that stores every single fact imaginable and as little emotional memory as is possible.

You are not INFP What you've described certainly points to Si, though.

If I were to guess based on your post alone (especially the way you seem to already be categorising your thought and behaviour processes), I would say INTP. But hell, I can't make head or tail of this paragraph:

When I'm writing, my Ti will bounce things off Fi, and Ti then funnels it onto paper. My external functions are barely even visible, let alone developed. I've always tested as INFP, because I'm very sensitive to those I am close to, but it's never quite sat as well as the T. Fi's developed, very strong morals, and Ti's developed (overdeveloped more like), (decisions made by Fi and Ti bouncing off each other), but I don't really identify with Ne, but rather with Fe. But how does that happen...?

...since it doesn't really tell me anything about how you think or behave, and seems to reflect a misunderstanding of what the functions describe and how they affect each other. "Ti bounces things off Fi"? That doesn't describe anything.

Try to make a concerted effort to describe your behaviour and thought-process without analysing it before-hand; describe what you're interested in, and why you're interested in it. That should help us get a clearer understanding of what you're about.

 

[Matthew_Z]

I'm going to say INTP and let everyone else state the reasons why.

 

[MayFlowers]

I was precocious as a little kid. Even now, I tend to have friendships with older people - right now, I'm in good correspondence with some thirtysomethings and several college students. My life, unfortunately, has been defined by what has been taken away from me, rather than what I have attempted to achieve. Which is why I'm so terribly keen on getting out of here - maybe this way, I'll be able to get some control over my own life. :/ Despite not being emotional on the outside to people I don't know terribly well, I have an impossibly soft heart. Like, I take other people into account a lot, I'm usually the one attempting to break up flamewars on the forums I'm in (because people get hurt in them!) If I'm angry, I'll scream and throw things, then stalk outside and sob about things being unfair in general. And then wipe up, and though I find it really difficult to apologize, I can pretend to. So things go on.

(I picked a secondary screenname, not my usual one on the Internet, for this registration. I'm a slightly paranoid geek.)

 

[MayFlowers]

Yes, let me try a different angle.

----

What makes you angry?
There are some people I have to interact with who shut down their minds and just drag through life without any reasoning as to why and where they're actually going. A complete lack of understanding and disinterest in acquiring it: that is what most completely irritates me. Everything else is a derivative of this.

What do you like/dislike most about people?
Some people come up with really cool things. However, the fact that we have a distribution of talents means that the less gifted end up as cannon fodder. It's been that way throughout history, and I do wish it would change. But it won't, and most people will be greedy idiots with clouded minds.

Do you like animals? why?
Animals have the entirely enviable talent for living in the moment - for joy in the smallest things, something I've always wanted and I try to cultivate, despite it only occasionally working. I've never actually had pets, although I wouldn't pass up the opportunity. No, wait, I had one once. A hamster who died, I'm not sure how or why at this point, I was too young to figure out what had happened and even now I don't even remember anymore.

What do you like most about the favorite people in your life?
What my own head can't give me is a sense of perspective, and that is why I seek others - to give me the detached and sometimes very interesting perspectives that I cannot provide myself. From there, affection and the like might follow. Or not. But trust is more important than affection. I couldn't trust my parents not to dump me out on the floor irregularly, so it's been that much more difficult. Although anonymity makes it a bit easier.

What do you like/dislike most about yourself?
I know all too well where my limitations lie. I guess I appreciate that. I'm good at figuring out what has to be done, but not at putting things through to completion, because I tend to get hung up on inconsistencies (which is what I don't like). It's why I want to figure out who I am, and who I'm not, so I can make these judgements more clearly.

Do you care about being fashionable? why/why not?
My clothes are utilitarian and comfortable. Fashionable, in that case, is -always- a coincidence. Fashion is the method devised for people to tell the in-crowd apart from the "other people" - and I've always landed straight in the second category.

Do you prefer to fit in or stand out?
Theoretically, neither, I do what I want and if that happens to "fit in", so be it. However, in actuality, when I do what I want, it almost always stands out. I just refuse to prioritize it, that's all.

What activities do you enjoy?
Figuring out how things work, although one of my friends has been slowly introducing me to the S way of life, in that new experiences are worth it on their own merits without necessarily having to pick them apart. Which I am definitely receptive to.

What makes you feel secure?
I haven't been truly secure in so long I don't even know where I get it anymore. :/ I wish... but there's no sense extrapolating from something I don't even remember anymore. For the present, I'll settle for being assured that nobody's going to betray me.

Do you like being in a relationship? why/why not?
I've never -been- in one. The high school dating pool is skewed towards those seeking new experiences, and the new for me has always been worse than the old, and I've never been attracted to anyone in a manner that might be recognized as love. Am I making excuses?

What do you love and why? Could be people, things, places, etc...
I like the feeling when all the pieces click and I finally understand what I've been trying to tease out for ages. It has to be a problem I choose, though.

What do you spend the most time thinking about?
Figuring out how the people I am with work. Yes, it's probably ultimately useless, but a partial understanding will help me much more than a "Yeah it's useless quit wasting your time". Typology is to actual psychological evaluation as sizes in a department store are to tailored clothes - what's close enough is close enough.

How much have you changed over the years? Who were you as a child?
I wrote poetry for a period about 9th grade. It pulled my latent Fi into shape. So I've tested as INFP for a while now, even though I'm not one.

----

I've always been a slow smart person, which - alas - isn't at all recognized by our society. I suppose being on the fringes has pulled me towards the interests of minorities and the underserved. I might be a logician, but I also have a very soft heart.

 

[VagrantFarce]

Do you like animals? why?
Animals have the entirely enviable talent for living in the moment - for joy in the smallest things, something I've always wanted and I try to cultivate, despite it only occasionally working.

Hmm, Aspirational Se

What do you like most about the favorite people in your life?
What my own head can't give me is a sense of perspective, and that is why I seek others - to give me the detached and sometimes very interesting perspectives that I cannot provide myself.

Sounds an awful lot like Ni.

What activities do you enjoy?
Figuring out how things work, although one of my friends has been slowly introducing me to the S way of life, in that new experiences are worth it on their own merits without necessarily having to pick them apart. Which I am definitely receptive to.

Sounds like Ti.

Do you like being in a relationship? why/why not?
I've never -been- in one. The high school dating pool is skewed towards those seeking new experiences, and the new for me has always been worse than the old, and I've never been attracted to anyone in a manner that might be recognized as love. Am I making excuses?

Ne/Si Conflict?

What do you love and why? Could be people, things, places, etc...
I like the feeling when all the pieces click and I finally understand what I've been trying to tease out for ages. It has to be a problem I choose, though.

Oh god, raging Ti.

What do you spend the most time thinking about?
Figuring out how the people I am with work. Yes, it's probably ultimately useless, but a partial understanding will help me much more than a "Yeah it's useless quit wasting your time". Typology is to actual psychological evaluation as sizes in a department store are to tailored clothes - what's close enough is close enough.

How they work, huh? Definite thinking bias.

I would say it's down to INTP, ISTP or INTJ. I think it's safe to rule out INFP.

 

[JocktheMotie]

Could always be one of those NiTi INFJs...

 

[MayFlowers]

Well, to be fair, the Asperger's does pull me towards certain traits more than others. In one fairly obvious case, I tend to be very difficult when I don't know things ahead of time, but that's because - god, this sounds stupid - I was traumatized by a snow day (and several other similar occurences). Yeah, the "preference" (understatement, btw) for routines they always say about autistic people. Instead I guess I sit back and figure out what's going to happen before I get there and actually do it. It takes a while, because if I don't do that I tend to be impossible to deal with - everything comes at once and I can't think through it all except one-at-a-time (I have never been good at "spur of the moment", it makes social situations very difficult). This has always tested as an extreme P bias. I don't know about that.

 

[MayFlowers]

I have the feeling I'm missing something really obvious. I have a hundred projects, all started, none finished.

 

[VagrantFarce]

I have a hundred projects, all started, none finished.

You can safely rule out INTJ, I think. So, INTP or ISTP? I'd say INTP, but you mentioned how you envy animals for being able to "live in the moment" and enjoy "the smallest things", which screamed Extraverted Sensation. Could you extrapolate on that some more?

You also mention that other people give you "detached and sometimes very interesting perspectives that I cannot provide myself". Could you expand on this as well?

 

[Space_Oddity]

Almost everything that you wrote, MayFlowers, sounds pretty INTP to me.

So, INTP or ISTP? I'd say INTP, but you mentioned how you envy animals for being able to "live in the moment" and enjoy "the smallest things", which screamed Extraverted Sensation. Could you extrapolate on that some more?

VagrantFarce, this was the only thing of all MayFlowers' posts that could maybe suggest Se, wasn't it? The rest totally points to an iNtuitive, I'd say, so I don't think it's necessary to hold onto details. And to be honest, I don't even think it suggests Se, because envying someone that they live in the moment and enjoy the smallest things doesn't mean that one does that as well. In fact, it rather means the opposite. I also envy my pets that they can do these things, but it's only because I'm absolutely not capable of them myself.