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Challenge: Am i an ISFJ or an INFJ. Or am i something completely different?

coldbluewaves

New member
Joined
Apr 8, 2009
Messages
20
MBTI Type
ISFJ
I'm not really sure at all what type i am. I know i'm Introverted, that is the one thing i am absolutely sure of. On the tests that i have done i have gotten mostly ISFJ, with INFJ coming after that. I seem to have more in common in terms of beliefs and such with the ISFJ.. but i'm not so sure about it.

I will now procede to bore you with lots of random (possibly unimportant) information about myself (please accept my apologies =P):

I feel like I am polite, loyal, and respectful of others (to an extent). I find that for me to be (proper) friends with someone I have to develop some comfortability with them first before I let out the ~real~ me, and start making more jokes and such. I am somewhat shy. I feel this largely comes back to me not feeling worthy currently, as I am not very happy with the current me that is me right now. I enjoy sports and team environments a lot. IDK why, but I just love it and am very loyal to my teammates, and find it very easy to feel comfortable to make jokes and such.

I am very distant with my parents in some ways. I do not share an absolute ton with them. It is somewhat because they have closed minds, IMO, but also because I’ve just always had somewhat of a disconnect with them. We are not the same, we are very different, me and my family. I am probably closest to my eldest brother out of everyone in my family even though he hasn’t lived at home (for much) in the past 8 years or so of my life. I still love everybody in my family, and have a lot of affection for them, and would die for them (if it came to it), but I am just not open with them much at all?

My ease of being laid back and just.. ~kicking it~ and telling jokes varies depending on my mood. I always enjoy it a lot though. Not sure if that has any relevance, but w00t for in4mashun.

I have a strong dislike for the idea of an ISFJ based on their summary as it just sounds so boring to me (admirable, no doubt, but boring), so I kind of don’t like the idea of being an ISFJ.

I have plans for myself. Only fairly basic plans, but, for instance i plan to go over to America and Canada (i live in Australia) in the next couple of years. I've been planning this for a fair while now, it is something that i want to do ridiculously bad. I only just recently fully got underway into actually, y'know, taking steps toward carrying out this plan. I got myself a job a few weeks ago, and i plan to save 50-70% of my paychecks a week towards that trip so that i should have plenty of money to go over there in a year and a half to maybe two years. So far i'm doing okay on that with not having spent a dime of my earned money yet, and not really feeling a special need to (apart from a couple of days where i seriously considering giving a friend $40-80 to help he/she out with something that i considered somewhat important. They fixed that on their own, so it doesn't matter anymore, but anyway).

Again, i do plan out things in my life somewhat, but in my current environment i feel that that is something that is very important if i wish to survive (and thrive) and not just retreat into a corner. I have set goals for myself that are very important to me, and i will be incredibly upset if i don't achieve them. There are many goals too that are important to me but also ones that i can live without accomplishing. Is that an ISFJ thing? I was reading that they like to plan things out and are kinda strict about it, but i'm not so sure that that is totally me. I may have a mild version of it, but not an absolute.

I do note down things to remember (in my mind, and now in a more literal sense when it's something that i worry i might not be incredible at remembering) in regards to other people. I am pretty much 100% sure on what i plan to get a friend for her birthday (she never asked, nor ever suggested it, but i think it'd be something she'd love, and i just really wanna get it for her), and i just wish it weren't so far away. Apparently that's an ISFJ thing, but i feel that that is something that a lot of people do with people they care about, no? I also have a good idea of what i plan to get for a few people in my family, and another friend, already, but yeahhh...

I am heavily into music. A lot of the music that i am into i like more if it makes me ~determined~ there is a line from a song that i like a lot that really connects with me. It is:

"What you don’t believe or see now you will know later
I idolize this man that you will know later
We got a ways to go before we idolize this man"

Don't take the “idolize” literally, but this is something that makes me feel determined, and i connect with it somewhat? Heh, IDK. I also like music that i do not connect with a whole lot, too, so i feel like music may not give any idea of what 'type' i am.
As you can see in my sig, I also often put music lyrics in my AIM away, my signatures and such these days. Sometimes it’s just awesome lyrics that I can’t relate to, sometimes it’s music that I relate to, and sometimes it relates to how I feel at that moment (good luck guessing all of those at the times =P).

I struggle with the idea of not being able to fix things for people that i care about. Currently my family is going through some troubles and i strongly wish i could help, and i try to help as much as possible.. but there are also things that i strongly wish to do that prevent me from helping as much as i somewhat wish i would. I feel a large amount of guilt over this.

I compare myself incessantly to other people, to the ~me~ that i want to be, and such and i find that i come up short a lot. That upsets me somewhat, but also only furthers my determination to improve myself. I have a huge amount of determination but my discipline (in acting on that determination) falters a fair bit. I have troubles with my friendships a fair bit too, I sometimes feel like… “Why are they friends with me? I don’t really deserve their friendship.” ….wow, I’m sorry, that makes me sound really emo. =/

I do not like burdening people with my problems, and try to do that as little as humanly possible, but i also very much enjoy helping other people with my problems. I realise that these two things may contradict each other. I think maybe i don't see myself as equal? That i don't consider myself worthy of having them help me with my ~burdens~. Or maybe i see myself as weak if i do, that i can handle my own problems, that i don't want people to bare my burden, i can do it? Maybe it's a bit of both? But i feel like the latter implies that i think the people who i try to help out are ~weak~ when that is simply not true in the least. It's 99% of the time the exact opposite. Uhh, I read that this is somewhat of an ISFJ characteristic (the "burden" thing), so is that another clue that i am an ISFJ, or what?

I find it hard to cry sometimes on my own. I find I only really cry when another person is crying. I suppose in some ways I don’t really realise things until then (even then I don’t really “cry”), and also sometimes it’s cry-by-association? ROFL. IDK how any of this is relevant. IDK what I’m saying. (“I never know what I’m saying” < / firefly/serenity reference)

Also, a while ago I started playing an MMORPG called Lord Of The Rings Online with a few friends, and since one of those friends has since moved on (and the other I am no longer friends with – long story – he’s an absolute douchebag ^_^) I don’t really enjoy it at all (but I like the idea of it) unless I am playing with a few of the friends that I made in that game. Does that have any relevance? Haha.

I realise i am sharing a lot right now but these are some things that i actually suppose i needed to put into words and that i thought maybe would help to understand who/what I am. And maybe you guys can help me get a better idea of maybe who i am/what i am? I am still a teenager, so i suppose i'm still growing into who i am and a lot of this seems to convey ~self doubts~ which are somewhat typical of teenagers, right?

Wow.. If any of you actually read this, I commend you. And I’m, again, very sorry for the idiocy and rambling that’s rampant in this post. I feel like I just told you my life story, ugh. =P

Soooo, what am I, my pplz? :)
 

Warm

Member
Joined
Dec 28, 2008
Messages
727
MBTI Type
ISFJ
I feel like I am polite, loyal, and respectful of others (to an extent). I find that for me to be (proper) friends with someone I have to develop some comfortability with them first before I let out the ~real~ me, and start making more jokes and such. I am somewhat shy.
In real life I am this way also. I think I'm pretty much always guarded in some way in that online I don't reveal a lot of personal things as far as family, location, etc. go although I am an open book otherwise (Um, on Vent anyway.). In person I'm guarded in the way that you described but not because I don't like who I am but because I don't always see a reason to open up to others.


I am very distant with my parents in some ways. I do not share an absolute ton with them. It is somewhat because they have closed minds, IMO, but also because I’ve just always had somewhat of a disconnect with them. We are not the same, we are very different, me and my family. I am probably closest to my eldest brother out of everyone in my family even though he hasn’t lived at home (for much) in the past 8 years or so of my life. I still love everybody in my family, and have a lot of affection for them, and would die for them (if it came to it), but I am just not open with them much at all?
I have a close-knit family in that we are always there for each other despite our diverse personalities. I find that I can talk to my mother about personal relationships (other than my marriage most times) and to my father about life decisions, not that I can't go to them both about either thing.


I have a strong dislike for the idea of an ISFJ based on their summary as it just sounds so boring to me (admirable, no doubt, but boring), so I kind of don’t like the idea of being an ISFJ.
Don't ever think that you are EXACTLY what is prescribed for a particular type. A test said that you are ISFJ. Um, okay, well, go with the part of that which works for you and leave the rest. You don't have to see yourself as boring just because of some type description. ISFJs rock!!! I should know. Um, well, at least I rock. *giggles*
I have plans for myself. Only fairly basic plans, but, for instance i plan to go over to America and Canada (i live in Australia) in the next couple of years. I've been planning this for a fair while now, it is something that i want to do ridiculously bad. I only just recently fully got underway into actually, y'know, taking steps toward carrying out this plan. I got myself a job a few weeks ago, and i plan to save 50-70% of my paychecks a week towards that trip so that i should have plenty of money to go over there in a year and a half to maybe two years. So far i'm doing okay on that with not having spent a dime of my earned money yet, and not really feeling a special need to (apart from a couple of days where i seriously considering giving a friend $40-80 to help he/she out with something that i considered somewhat important. They fixed that on their own, so it doesn't matter anymore, but anyway).

Again, i do plan out things in my life somewhat, but in my current environment i feel that that is something that is very important if i wish to survive (and thrive) and not just retreat into a corner. I have set goals for myself that are very important to me, and i will be incredibly upset if i don't achieve them. There are many goals too that are important to me but also ones that i can live without accomplishing. Is that an ISFJ thing? I was reading that they like to plan things out and are kinda strict about it, but i'm not so sure that that is totally me. I may have a mild version of it, but not an absolute.

Warm=planning=Warm!!! I get upset if I am unable to plan! My husband's family is one that HATES to plan, so they don't give us a lot of information ahead of time when they want to visit or want us to do something for them. This IRKS me! I need info, people! I NEED TO PLAN!


I struggle with the idea of not being able to fix things for people that i care about. Currently my family is going through some troubles and i strongly wish i could help, and i try to help as much as possible.. but there are also things that i strongly wish to do that prevent me from helping as much as i somewhat wish i would. I feel a large amount of guilt over this.
This is something that I had to learn to get over because I would become physically ill with worry. Now, I figure that I just have to let go of those things over which I have no control because it does more harm than good to worry.


I do not like burdening people with my problems, and try to do that as little as humanly possible, but i also very much enjoy helping other people with my problems. I realise that these two things may contradict each other. I think maybe i don't see myself as equal? That i don't consider myself worthy of having them help me with my ~burdens~. Or maybe i see myself as weak if i do, that i can handle my own problems, that i don't want people to bare my burden, i can do it? Maybe it's a bit of both? But i feel like the latter implies that i think the people who i try to help out are ~weak~ when that is simply not true in the least. It's 99% of the time the exact opposite. Uhh, I read that this is somewhat of an ISFJ characteristic (the "burden" thing), so is that another clue that i am an ISFJ, or what?
In high school I constantly felt depressed but never showed it to anyone at school because I didn't want people to perceive me as weak. I rarely let my family see because I figured they had enough problems of their own. One day I just told myself that the world has problems and that I'm not special just because I have them. Okay, this sounds harsh, but it actually put things in perspective for me so that I was able to deal with my problems.

I find it hard to cry sometimes on my own. I find I only really cry when another person is crying. I suppose in some ways I don’t really realise things until then (even then I don’t really “cry”), and also sometimes it’s cry-by-association? ROFL. IDK how any of this is relevant. IDK what I’m saying. (“I never know what I’m saying” < / firefly/serenity reference)
Maybe this is more a guy thing rather than a type thing. I have no problem crying.

Also, a while ago I started playing an MMORPG called Lord Of The Rings Online with a few friends, and since one of those friends has since moved on (and the other I am no longer friends with – long story – he’s an absolute douchebag ^_^) I don’t really enjoy it at all (but I like the idea of it) unless I am playing with a few of the friends that I made in that game. Does that have any relevance? Haha.
I like to RP.

I realise i am sharing a lot right now but these are some things that i actually suppose i needed to put into words and that i thought maybe would help to understand who/what I am. And maybe you guys can help me get a better idea of maybe who i am/what i am? I am still a teenager, so i suppose i'm still growing into who i am and a lot of this seems to convey ~self doubts~ which are somewhat typical of teenagers, right?
Exactly!
 

Thursday

Earth Exalted
Joined
Mar 14, 2008
Messages
3,960
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
ISFJ
that weak Ne is coming out with all the "what-ifs" and possibilities you've listed
even the thread title
 

Thursday

Earth Exalted
Joined
Mar 14, 2008
Messages
3,960
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
"That weak Ne"...Soooooooooooo condescending.

I know:blush:
Its a euphemism for 4th function Ne
I have the same thing with Se and my bawdy behavior and talk/being a slave to my impulses
 

Warm

Member
Joined
Dec 28, 2008
Messages
727
MBTI Type
ISFJ
I know:blush:
Its a euphemism for 4th function Ne
I have the same thing with Se and my bawdy behavior and talk/being a slave to my impulses
Hon, euphemisms are supposed to be the LESS offensive terms. *giggles*
 

Snow Turtle

New member
Joined
May 28, 2007
Messages
1,335
I'd say ISFJ. Hello my fellow friend. :D

It's a shame that we're shown as boring people. We're totally not! Warm is a huge example. ^^

If it makes you feel special. The fact that you are here makes you unique ISFJ. We are after all the uncommon type here.
 

coldbluewaves

New member
Joined
Apr 8, 2009
Messages
20
MBTI Type
ISFJ
Hey, thanks for reading and replying! I appreciate you guys taking the time to read that junk (and replying). :)

Don't ever think that you are EXACTLY what is prescribed for a particular type. A test said that you are ISFJ. Um, okay, well, go with the part of that which works for you and leave the rest. You don't have to see yourself as boring just because of some type description. ISFJs rock!!! I should know. Um, well, at least I rock. *giggles*

Haha, thanks. That actually helps a fair bit. And yes, you do seem to be very cool. ;)

In high school I constantly felt depressed but never showed it to anyone at school because I didn't want people to perceive me as weak. I rarely let my family see because I figured they had enough problems of their own. One day I just told myself that the world has problems and that I'm not special just because I have them. Okay, this sounds harsh, but it actually put things in perspective for me so that I was able to deal with my problems.

Heh. That seems.. logical.

Maybe this is more a guy thing rather than a type thing. I have no problem crying.

Yeah, that might be the case. Might be sort of how i was raised too, idk. (Real) Men don't cry.

If it makes you feel special. The fact that you are here makes you unique ISFJ. We are after all the uncommon type here.

Haha, that's kind of cool, i guess. :cheese:

Okay, so i'm beginning to come around to the idea that i'm an ISFJ, i suppose. I read this earlier and a bunch of it rung totally true for me. Some bits of course weren't so true, but i guess that's not really the point, is it? I'd go piece by piece saying what's true but it'd be a bunch of "Wow this is so true.", "ooh interesting!", etc.

Also, i forgot to add in the previous post that i'm not religious at all, and i am not very organized either (my room is an absolute mess, for instance). =P My iTunes is incredibly organized though (lyrics for 90% of the songs + Album art, etc, lol). :laugh:

I feel like i have way more to add, actually, but i'm really tired so i can't think amazingly straight. I figured i'd post now and acknowledge (and thank you for) your posts. It's cool to ask more questions when they come to me, yeah? Again, you guys are awesome!
 

Warm

Member
Joined
Dec 28, 2008
Messages
727
MBTI Type
ISFJ
Also, i forgot to add in the previous post that i'm not religious at all, and i am not very organized either (my room is an absolute mess, for instance). =P My iTunes is incredibly organized though (lyrics for 90% of the songs + Album art, etc, lol). :laugh:

Because the term, "religious", has such a negative connotation these days, I wouldn't say that I'm religious either. I am, however, a Christian. Oh, yeah, I'm messy too. lol
 

Eiddy

Pronounced eye-ee-dee
Joined
Apr 20, 2009
Messages
757
MBTI Type
DEAD
Enneagram
1w2
I can so relate and see so much of myself in it even into thinking about planning and hating to feel like I bother others, not feeling worthy. Quite actually I have two fears; (1) some how being inadequate and (2) being late.

Then there is the willingness to open up your feelings and how you feel about all of it. Welcome to the ISFj club.. (((hugs)))
 

Forever

Permabanned
Joined
Aug 30, 2013
Messages
8,551
MBTI Type
NiFi
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
ACCEPT YOUR FATE
 
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