Type ambiguity

[Siegfried]

I want to find out my natural MBTI from ENFP, INFP or INTJ and what I have learned from external adaptation.

If an individual is the sole INTJ in a family, where strong Fi/Fe is encouraged and INTJ's auxilary Te not encouraged in primary socialisation, i.e family of sensitive Fi/Fe and religious background. For the INTJ, it would mean his or or her tertiary Fi has been developed to a somewhat higher degree than the INTJ mean. How would they differ from the "typical" INTJ as described by MBTI? Is it possible they could due to their environment seem a mixture of dominant Fi INFP, auxilary Fi ENFP and teritary Fi INTJ?


To give a better picture;

-I am an Enneagram 9w1 and almost 21 years old.
-My mother and childhood friend who I've know for over 15 years are adamant I am INFJ not INFP, but don't have much knowledge about MBTI, just read the online descriptions, Keirsey, etc. Think I am much in my internal world as external.
-I commute to university and have to journey back home home every day, so by circumstance seem more introverted than I am. I wanted to live in campus btw.
-Close friends think I am extroverted and warm.
-People who don't know me well, find me very hard to read, I seem completely composed and emotionless, out in public.
-I love analysing everything, whether psychology or hobbies, almost to perfectionist levels, this is both an asset and a drawback.
-In my tests I have come out as an INTJ, INFP, INTP, INFJ, ENFP, ENFJ, at least the N is clear.
-My parents are very old compared to others, in their 60s, so they are much more rounded in terms of their type, this will have had an effect on me.

 

[INTJMom]

Let's just take for granted that you are N.
Based on how other people have a hard time reading you, I'd say you're probably "I".
"E"s aren't generally hard to read.



Let me ask you a couple of questions and try to give me as much feedback as you can
(like a couple of sentences, not just yes or no):

When you have to deal with people's feelings, does it annoy you and/or exhaust you or is it easy for you?
Do you have to think about their feelings or do you sense their feelings naturally?

Do you secretly remember information about what people like so you know what to buy them for presents?


What makes you more uncomfortable most of the time: to wait until the last minute to decide something, or to make a hard and fast decision too far ahead of time?

 

[Siegfried]

Let's just take for granted that you are N.
Based on how other people have a hard time reading you, I'd say you're probably "I".
"E"s aren't generally hard to read.



Let me ask you a couple of questions and try to give me as much feedback as you can
(like a couple of sentences, not just yes or no):

When you have to deal with people's feelings, does it annoy you and/or exhaust you or is it easy for you?
Do you have to think about their feelings or do you sense their feelings naturally?

Do you secretly remember information about what people like so you know what to buy them for presents?


What makes you more uncomfortable most of the time: to wait until the last minute to decide something, or to make a hard and fast decision too far ahead of time?

1) If it is a mature, interesting discussion on feelings, that is great and also enjoy light hearted discussions, that add humour and depth, a bond is formed, there is refinement in my social ability and knowledge has been accumulated. The problems for me are when people take unintended things way too personally towards themselves, which can be draining, there has to be a fair balance with rationality.

2) I read people's emotions very well, which helps in empathy, see the subtle strokes in their feelings, usually have an instanteous hunch what they are feeling, but end up reflecting/branching out on various possible reasons, since I want to purge any flaws in my understanding, other people's perceptions of me matter, I guess.

3) When I do give presents, I take into account what their interests are in, what they're personality is like, when I am going to purchase the present, not usually before. Present giving is not common around the people I know.

4) I prefer making decisions moderately early, to set out a step by step plan. It is when I am depressed that I start leaving things to the last minute.

 

[INTJMom]

Ok. Great!

I think you're definitely an F.
And it sounds like you are mostly J.
So that would make you INFJ.
But from your OP it sounded like you thought you were an INFP.

What are your hobbies, interests, what do you enjoy doing?
What are you studying in school?

 

[Siegfried]

I literally often get INFX bang on 50% J 50% P on online tests, which really puzzled me, hehe. Generally all my functions look rounded. I thought I was either an INFP or INTJ, didn't relatively put much thought into if I was INFJ, since it would mean I have got the definitions of Ni/Ne Fe/Fi internally muddled up. It would explain why I need closure so much.

A mix of everything.
-In terms of subjects love psychology, philosophy, history, politics, any of the arts subjects.
- Sports-Squash, cricket, football, tabletennis, gyming.
-In terms of the more generalised passive mediums, movies, books, anime, TV series, all are good if you choose carefully. Prefer those that have depth to them and are thought provoking. While I used to read a lot of fantasy novels, I prefer those now that have some historical background and have some mystery, thriller complication.
-Learning about different cultures is great, if I ever get the opportunity I want to travel around the world.
-The usual being with friends, loved ones that doesn't count
Studying law, I had a bad turn in it, in the last year, because I really, really don't like commuting, the subject itself I enjoy, things are on the up now.

It is common for INFJ males to be mistaken for INTJs?

 

[INTJMom]

Perhaps you can get confirmation from reading some writing of the INFJs here, but I think INFJ is a much better match for you. INTJ is very doubtful. I wouldn't say it's "common" for INFJs to be mistaken for INTJs, but the INFJs here are a lot more like us INTJs than I originally thought they were from what I had learned in books.

"Needing closure" is the main sign that you are J and not P. It's good that you have plenty of ability to be flexible though. In the long run, that should serve you well.

I guess you're mom and friend were right.

Feel free to come back and ask if you have any other questions pop up.

 

[Siegfried]

Perhaps you can get confirmation from reading some writing of the INFJs here, but I think INFJ is a much better match for you. INTJ is very doubtful. I wouldn't say it's "common" for INFJs to be mistaken for INTJs, but the INFJs here are a lot more like us INTJs than I originally thought they were from what I had learned in books.

"Needing closure" is the main sign that you are J and not P. It's good that you have plenty of ability to be flexible though. In the long run, that should serve you well.

I guess you're mom and friend were right.

Feel free to come back and ask if you have any other questions pop up.

Thanks a lot for the help. I'll evaluate the writings of the INFJs here to ascertain, definitively if I am INFJ. I'll have to tell my mom and friend they were right.