Type me by a self made questionnaire... Am I an NF or an NT? ?

[OptoGypsy]

1. Do you believe in a God? I don't believe in the traditional definition of a God, a father figure on a throne somewhere up in the heavens. I believe in God as life itself, the heart of man is in Gods law and I do believe in the resurrection. We live in a world of shadows and God is the nature that penetrates it, light itself. Another liked definition is that of him being a physical force, behind the evolution of minds and of nature in the quantum and evolution which can be explained through the automation of algorithms (I'm reading through Daniel Dennet's, From Bacteria to Bach and Back), I think the atheists misunderstand philosophy, we can explain processes of nature through the scientific method and focusing on the facts, but there needs to be a magician behind the processes behind the patterning of nature, the mimicry of nature that plays with the human mind and gives them delight of discovery.

2. What is your philosophy? My philosophy consists of doing what you were made for, what you are suited for and doing the best you can at it. As the parable goes you cannot teach a fish to climb a tree. Politically I am Conservative, I think spirituality comes from feeling timelessness by becoming one with nature, not a prolonged phase but a life shattering experience, I also believe that time is the ocean and each second is a raindrop. In this all unifying ocean, with its rippling effects we are all independent parts living in a holistic whole that can never be sustained, drained or overfull, although a flood is coming with time and time expands, consciousness expands to consume all, in the vortex of time. I also believe that the entire universe resides in the heart (inner being). I had my first philosophy at the age of thirteen, an earlier experience and thought process can show a revelation as to the way a person changes and has been molded, it has been coined as abstract art but at the time I thought it was philosophy and an explanation of consciousness. The theory is insane, childish and dark. It pretty much went like this: We can see and experience consciousness and personality by madness/insanity: creation through destruction. Such as the weak overcoming the strong and being overcome, the ugly destroying the beautiful and the thrill of the beautiful feeling at the moment of insanity.

3. What are your Interests?
1. Abstract Art
2. The Brain
3. Personality
4. Psychology
I majored in Cyber Security and Forensics, but I wouldn't consider my self as a technical person. I don't seem to be bad at it but I think i can definitely can get better at it.

4. What are your struggles? I view everything as a coin, two sides of the same things. I struggle with perfectionism, wanting to be the best and to succeed at the same time i feel an innate feeling to self sabotage, I can also work on being more independent and not living to please others but the soul does come from self-sacrifice, but there also exists death and yet eternity that exists within the inner self.

5. What are your values?
1. Authenticity: To be authentic, genuine, real; to be true to myself.
2. Courage: To be courageous or brave; to persist in the face of fear, threat, or difficulty
3. Freedom: to live freely; to choose how i live and behave, or help others do likewise.
4. Industry: to be industrious, hard-working, dedicated
5. Persistence: to continue resolutely despite problems or difficulties
6. Self-development: to keep growing, advancing or improving in knowledge, skills, character or life experience.

5, What motivates you? An innate desire to be able to take care of myself, not to be a man child, to be successful and of course romance.

6. People you look up to? Jesus Christ, My family, Nikolai Tesla, Leonardo da Vinci, Fyodor Dostoevsky

7. Favorite Books of all time?
Honorable Mentions:
Anna Karenina Fix – Viv Goskop
Darwin's Dangerous Idea: How Religion Poisons Everything – Daniel Dennett
A Series of Unfortunate Events (Series)
The White Bull - Voltaire

35. The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe – C.S Lewis
34. How to Ruin Everything - George Watsky
33. Mirogorod - Nikolai Gogol
32. The Stranger – Albert Camus
31. Invitation to a Beheading - Vladimir Nabokov
30. Mere Christianity – C.S Lewis
29. Heart of a Dog – Mikhail Bulgakov
28. Pale Fire - Vladimir Nabokov
27. Wild Sheep Chase – Haruki Murakami
26. The Gray House – Mariam Petrosyan
25. Kitchen – Banana Yoshimoto
24. On Miracles – C.S Lewis
23. Voroshilovgrad – Serhiy Zhadan
22. Faust - Goethe
21. Kafka on the Shore – Haruki Murakami
20. Eugene Onegin – Alexander Pushkin
19. A Reporters Account of the Scopes Trials - H.L Mencken
18. Night of Denial - Ivan Bunin
17. Despair - Vladimir Nabokov
16. Alice in Wonderland – Lewis Carroll
15. The Death of Ivan Ilyich - Leo Tolstoy
14. Candide – Voltaire
13. The Reason for God - Timothy Keller
12. Master and Margarita - Mikhail Bulgakov
11. The Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald
10. St. Petersburg – Andrei Bely
9. Evenings of a Farm Near Dikanka – Nikolai Gogol
8. The Forest Song – Lesya Ukrainka
7. The Queen of Spade – Alexander Pushkin
6. Petersburg Tales – Nikolai Gogol
5. Crime and Punishment – Fyodor Dostoevsky
4. Gregory Skovoroda: How the World Tried to Catch Me but Could Not
3. Brothers Karamazov – Fyodor Dostoevsky
2. Dead Souls – Nikolai Gogol
1. Holy Bible – God (it's God's word to us and gives us purpose and an explanation for life, I can go on for hundreds of pages on the wisdom that the Bible has and I still won't be able to reach its depth, I have an entire lifetime to learn from it and I'm excited for that. My top five favorite books in the Bible are the Gospel of John, Ecclesiastes, Proverbs, Hebrews, and Ruth.)

 

[OptoGypsy]

1. Do you believe in a God? I don't believe in the traditional definition of a God, a father figure on a throne somewhere up in the heavens. I believe in God as life itself, the heart of man is in Gods law and I do believe in the resurrection. We live in a world of shadows and God is the nature that penetrates it, light itself. Another liked definition is that of him being a physical force, behind the evolution of minds and of nature in the quantum and evolution which can be explained through the automation of algorithms (I'm reading through Daniel Dennet's, From Bacteria to Bach and Back), I think the atheists misunderstand philosophy, we can explain processes of nature through the scientific method and focusing on the facts, but there needs to be a magician behind the processes behind the patterning of nature, the mimicry of nature that plays with the human mind and gives them delight of discovery. 2. What is your philosophy? My philosophy consists of doing what you were made for, what you are suited for and doing the best you can at it. As the parable goes you cannot teach a fish to climb a tree. Politically I am Conservative, I think spirituality comes from feeling timelessness by becoming one with nature, not a prolonged phase but a life shattering experience, I also believe that time is the ocean and each second is a raindrop. In this all unifying ocean, with its rippling effects we are all independent parts living in a holistic whole that can never be sustained, drained or overfull, although a flood is coming with time and time expands, consciousness expands to consume all, in the vortex of time. I also believe that the entire universe resides in the heart (inner being). I had my first philosophy at the age of thirteen, an earlier experience and thought process can show a revelation as to the way a person changes and has been molded, it has been coined as abstract art but at the time I thought it was philosophy and an explanation of consciousness. The theory is insane, childish and dark. It pretty much went like this: We can see and experience consciousness and personality by madness/insanity: creation through destruction. Such as the weak overcoming the strong and being overcome, the ugly destroying the beautiful and the thrill of the beautiful feeling at the moment of insanity. 3. What are your Interests? 1. Abstract Art 2. The Brain 3. Personality 4. Psychology I majored in Cyber Security and Forensics, but I wouldn't consider my self as a technical person. I don't seem to be bad at it but I think i can definitely can get better at it. 4. What are your struggles? I view everything as a coin, two sides of the same things. I struggle with perfectionism, wanting to be the best and to succeed at the same time i feel an innate feeling to self sabotage, I can also work on being more independent and not living to please others but the soul does come from self-sacrifice, but there also exists death and yet eternity that exists within the inner self. 5. What are your values? 1. Authenticity: To be authentic, genuine, real; to be true to myself. 2. Courage: To be courageous or brave; to persist in the face of fear, threat, or difficulty 3. Freedom: to live freely; to choose how i live and behave, or help others do likewise. 4. Industry: to be industrious, hard-working, dedicated 5. Persistence: to continue resolutely despite problems or difficulties 6. Self-development: to keep growing, advancing or improving in knowledge, skills, character or life experience. 5, What motivates you? An innate desire to be able to take care of myself, not to be a man child, to be successful and of course romance. 6. People you look up to? Jesus Christ, My family, Nikolai Tesla, Leonardo da Vinci, Fyodor Dostoevsky 7. Favorite Books of all time? Honorable Mentions: Anna Karenina Fix – Viv Goskop Darwin's Dangerous Idea: How Religion Poisons Everything – Daniel Dennett A Series of Unfortunate Events (Series) The White Bull - Voltaire 35. The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe – C.S Lewis 34. How to Ruin Everything - George Watsky 33. Mirogorod - Nikolai Gogol 32. The Stranger – Albert Camus 31. Invitation to a Beheading - Vladimir Nabokov 30. Mere Christianity – C.S Lewis 29. Heart of a Dog – Mikhail Bulgakov 28. Pale Fire - Vladimir Nabokov 27. Wild Sheep Chase – Haruki Murakami 26. The Gray House – Mariam Petrosyan 25. Kitchen – Banana Yoshimoto 24. On Miracles – C.S Lewis 23. Voroshilovgrad – Serhiy Zhadan 22. Faust - Goethe 21. Kafka on the Shore – Haruki Murakami 20. Eugene Onegin – Alexander Pushkin 19. A Reporters Account of the Scopes Trials - H.L Mencken 18. Night of Denial - Ivan Bunin 17. Despair - Vladimir Nabokov 16. Alice in Wonderland – Lewis Carroll 15. The Death of Ivan Ilyich - Leo Tolstoy 14. Candide – Voltaire 13. The Reason for God - Timothy Keller 12. Master and Margarita - Mikhail Bulgakov 11. The Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald 10. St. Petersburg – Andrei Bely 9. Evenings of a Farm Near Dikanka – Nikolai Gogol 8. The Forest Song – Lesya Ukrainka 7. The Queen of Spade – Alexander Pushkin 6. Petersburg Tales – Nikolai Gogol 5. Crime and Punishment – Fyodor Dostoevsky 4. Gregory Skovoroda: How the World Tried to Catch Me but Could Not 3. Brothers Karamazov – Fyodor Dostoevsky 2. Dead Souls – Nikolai Gogol 1. Holy Bible – God (it's God's word to us and gives us purpose and an explanation for life, I can go on for hundreds of pages on the wisdom that the Bible has and I still won't be able to reach its depth, I have an entire lifetime to learn from it and I'm excited for that. My top five favorite books in the Bible are the Gospel of John, Ecclesiastes, Proverbs, Hebrews, and Ruth.)

Edit: feel free to ask me questions.

 

[Swivelinglight]

I skimmed through but I'm guessing enfj or something

 

[OptoGypsy]

I skimmed through but I'm guessing enfj or something

I'm not sure about enfj, they tend to be charismatic leaders, the politician type while I'm more of the artist type. Also I don't think that enfj tend to self sabotage. I created a recent thread with some writing. What makes you think that I'm an enfj?

 

[Swivelinglight]

Overall vibe. I don't think an enfp would typically write all of the above. Also those things you mentioned I don't think are type related.

Judging your behavior rather than what you claim about yourself

 

[OptoGypsy]

Overall vibe. I don't think an enfp would typically write all of the above. Also those things you mentioned I don't think are type related. Judging your behavior rather than what you claim about yourself

Gotcha I thought type can be inferred from thought patterns and processes, feel free to ask me questions. The reason I've used enfp is that's the type my therapist thinks I am (although she isn't well informed on the theory) and that I like keeping my options open instead of feeling defeated if I'm not successful in an objective. If it helps I can share what causes my anxiety, my anxiety is a result of not feeling like I have control over every outcome, even though I'm fully in control of myself I cant control the exterior variables causing anxiety and depression, also psychosis. On the big 5 I'm high on openness, Conscientiousness and average in the other three.

 

[OptoGypsy]

I think I may be an isfp. I've also received ENTJ, ESTJ INTP, INTJ, ENFJ and ENTP while taking the test.

 

[Vendrah]

Gotcha I thought type can be inferred from thought patterns and processes, feel free to ask me questions. The reason I've used enfp is that's the type my therapist thinks I am (although she isn't well informed on the theory) and that I like keeping my options open instead of feeling defeated if I'm not successful in an objective. If it helps I can share what causes my anxiety, my anxiety is a result of not feeling like I have control over every outcome, even though I'm fully in control of myself I cant control the exterior variables causing anxiety and depression, also psychosis. On the big 5 I'm high on openness, Conscientiousness and average in the other three.

Its a sure N.
However, the rest... Well, its a little bit hard to tell.

High on conscientiousness make J being quite likely although.
Telling E/I, F/T is quite hard although.

Trying questions, well, I dont usually do question but lets go..
1) How do you do socially?
2) When you talk about your opinions, do you tends to be more usually objective (describing data, describing facts/observations, describing likely scenarios, subscribing to general public opinions, recognizing overall feelings about the subject, etc...) or more usually subjective (describing your own thoughts, arriving with your own theories and constructions, describing your own feeling about that - like that feels wrong, describing your feeling about that 2 - like 'I have a bad feeling about this')?
3) Average on neuroticism, right?
4) If you entered up a heat fight on the politics sub-forum (this very website), with two people calling each other a liyar (ok I wrote it wrongly, it is lie as an adjective), and you would be forced to post something about it, what would you say (please more elaborated than just "Stop!")? Suppose they have some text with arguments.
[this 4 is inspired in a reality that happened today]

 

[RadicalDoubt]

I think, by dichotomy, that a high feeling type is highly likely. The questionaire that you constructed is primarily values based, focusing on belief and system of morality. I think a high N type is also quite plausible, as, judging from the list of books you've mentioned and the topics you decided to discuss in order to gauge your type revolved around philosophy, the abstract, and the intangible, which is suggestive that this is a focus of yours.

NF seems reasonable. Judging from your enneagram type, assuming it is correct, you are also most likely an extroverted type (although I suppose this depends on how your relate to each of the types and such).

Outside of NF (maybe ENFx), there's not really much to work off of here yet.

I my questions would be why do you value the things you do?

1) Why would you say the values that you've listed are important. What would it mean if you were not what you valued (ie. What would it imply if you were not "authentic")?

2) You've listed people, why do you admire them (in terms of traits and why you consider them valuable)?

3) Where are you weak? What traits do you often see in others that you can't replicate in yourself? Does this bother you at all and why?

 

[batteries included]

ISTJ maybe?

 

[OptoGypsy]

Its a sure N.
However, the rest... Well, its a little bit hard to tell.

High on conscientiousness make J being quite likely although.
Telling E/I, F/T is quite hard although.

Trying questions, well, I dont usually do question but lets go..
1) How do you do socially?
2) When you talk about your opinions, do you tends to be more usually objective (describing data, describing facts/observations, describing likely scenarios, subscribing to general public opinions, recognizing overall feelings about the subject, etc...) or more usually subjective (describing your own thoughts, arriving with your own theories and constructions, describing your own feeling about that - like that feels wrong, describing your feeling about that 2 - like 'I have a bad feeling about this')?
3) Average on neuroticism, right?
4) If you entered up a heat fight on the politics sub-forum (this very website), with two people calling each other a liyar (ok I wrote it wrongly, it is lie as an adjective), and you would be forced to post something about it, what would you say (please more elaborated than just "Stop!")? Suppose they have some text with arguments.
[this 4 is inspired in a reality that happened today]

1. I view myself as a social person although I don't make much time for it, I don't go to parties or events, but I am regularly at church and socializing with people and do call my close friends and family daily.
2. A mixture of the two, I used to call myself a gun and shoot metaphorical bullets through my words using and twisting ideas to make sense, I call it trolling: e.g from a story that he once went up to a simple, pious, young girl of the age of 17 and told her that she should join Femen, that the shame of nakedness is a sin as this shame was only experienced after Adam and Eve ate from the tree of Good and Evil and is therefore a feeling one gets from being separated from God, and therefore one can deduce that joining a group of women who are known to protest in the nude against sex trafficking and for feminism is godly. My sister who is an INTP says I live in boxes, categorizing and living by statistics.
3. Truth is relational, you guys are being absolutist which creates idealogue, and tunnel vision, try not to live by dogma or by relativism.

My mom who is an ESTJ and my Dad the ISTJ say that I need to work more and be more productive around the house, I'm kind of messy.

 

[OptoGypsy]

I think, by dichotomy, that a high feeling type is highly likely. The questionaire that you constructed is primarily values based, focusing on belief and system of morality. I think a high N type is also quite plausible, as, judging from the list of books you've mentioned and the topics you decided to discuss in order to gauge your type revolved around philosophy, the abstract, and the intangible, which is suggestive that this is a focus of yours.

NF seems reasonable. Judging from your enneagram type, assuming it is correct, you are also most likely an extroverted type (although I suppose this depends on how your relate to each of the types and such).

Outside of NF (maybe ENFx), there's not really much to work off of here yet.

I my questions would be why do you value the things you do?

1) Why would you say the values that you've listed are important. What would it mean if you were not what you valued (ie. What would it imply if you were not "authentic")?

2) You've listed people, why do you admire them (in terms of traits and why you consider them valuable)?

3) Where are you weak? What traits do you often see in others that you can't replicate in yourself? Does this bother you at all and why?

1. It would mean that I wont be creative or original, I wont be able to be a trailblazer in this world and will not share my originality with the world which would make me closed in.
2. I admire them for their ingenuity. I think it is important to bring something new to the table, original ideas is what I look towards more, I value Dostoevsky because of his spirituality, spirituality (otherworldly) is in my opinion the key to happiness.
3. I am weak in the areas of not feeling in control and I have an addictive personality which is probably a byproduct of my bipolar. I also wish that I was more responsible with money, and that I wasn't forgetful, I'm constantly losing things only to find them after ransacking the house.

 

[OptoGypsy]

ISTJ maybe?

My problem with ISTJ is that I prefer living by theory and understand more by the sense of the abstract. Although I use the abstract to create the grotesque and the absurd an example being: He is said to be a dreamer and a drunk, back when he was in school he day dreamed about being Azazel, as you probably know is the spirit of the desert, or the spirit of death, (the spirit to which the yearly sacrifice was sent to before the ultimate sacrifice whom is Christ) and his proposition of becoming Azazel was by sleeping with the entire district by convincing women that he is gay and trying to get them to make him straight and then blowing his brains and making it look like a murder by saying his brain was hacked putting the police men into a goose chase, he then thought that he would magically resurrect from the grave and will be given a new body, that of a woman’s. It is a wonder that he was able to get married at all, and many have wondered why his wife sticks around with him. O look there he comes out of the tavern on all fours, howling at the moon with a cigarette in his mouth, looking like a reindeer with its tail at the wrong end of the body, a nightmare of anatomy, he has antlers on top of his head.

With that being said I am a traditionalist and would say that I have my peoples (ukrainian) spirit living in me.

 

[Vendrah]

I think, by dichotomy, that a high feeling type is highly likely. The questionaire that you constructed is primarily values based, focusing on belief and system of morality. I think a high N type is also quite plausible, as, judging from the list of books you've mentioned and the topics you decided to discuss in order to gauge your type revolved around philosophy, the abstract, and the intangible, which is suggestive that this is a focus of yours.

NF seems reasonable. Judging from your enneagram type, assuming it is correct, you are also most likely an extroverted type (although I suppose this depends on how your relate to each of the types and such).

Outside of NF (maybe ENFx), there's not really much to work off of here yet.

Good point. I agree with NF.
[MENTION=20474]OptoGypsy[/MENTION] Your answers contradicts the big 5 results related to J...
Its hard to tell.
You made an ambivert answer on both questions 1 and 2. It would be more for ambiverted, however ENFP is closer to ambiverson tha INFP (for INFJ/ENFJ that doenst help much).
Perhaps you are P with high conscientiousness? That could cloud the J/P.

 

[OptoGypsy]

Good point. I agree with NF.

@OptoGypsy Your answers contradicts the big 5 results related to J...
Its hard to tell.
You made an ambivert answer on both questions 1 and 2. It would be more for ambiverted, however ENFP is closer to ambiverson tha INFP (for INFJ/ENFJ that doenst help much).
Perhaps you are P with high conscientiousness? That could cloud the J/P.

I see that makes sense, perhaps i am not high on Conscientiousness, I'm not as focused and driven as my ideal self is. I think I am an ENFP, but the enneagram results may be wrong and same with instinctual variants, help with those would be highly appreciated. I thought I may have been an NT because I do enjoy studying and working with computers and IT in general from cloud to penetration testing but I use the theories in place instead of coming up with my own in the field but then again I did just turn 25. I used to debate people all of the time back when I was a teen often in a trollish manner using jokes instead of specific systems. I have yet to systemize my thoughts and allot that I believe in comes from famous thinkers. People tell me that I'm too myself if I don't know them. I prefer group settings over to one to one conversations. These days I write poetry and stories publishing them on my blog instead of expressing them to others in person.

 

[Vendrah]

I see that makes sense, perhaps i am not high on Conscientiousness, I'm not as focused and driven as my ideal self is. I think I am an ENFP, but the enneagram results may be wrong and same with instinctual variants, help with those would be highly appreciated. I thought I may have been an NT because I do enjoy studying and working with computers and IT in general from cloud to penetration testing but I use the theories in place instead of coming up with my own in the field but then again I did just turn 25. I used to debate people all of the time back when I was a teen often in a trollish manner using jokes instead of specific systems. I have yet to systemize my thoughts and allot that I believe in comes from famous thinkers. People tell me that I'm too myself if I don't know them. I prefer group settings over to one to one conversations. These days I write poetry and stories publishing them on my blog instead of expressing them to others in person.

I graduated in engineering.
There should be a few ENFP/INFP in sciences too.
I had to force a decision between humanities and science like chemistry and math. I did like geography, study countries, etc...
But I dont like languages and I struggle memorizing stuff, I wish I had a better memory.

ENFP borderline T/F isnt that unusual. I measure stats, ENFP borderline E/I or T/F is not that uncommon.
What it is uncommon is ENFP with high conscinetiousness.

I want to see [MENTION=34313]RadicalDoubt[/MENTION] opinions, but, I think you are ENFP but unsure.
I have some reasons to guess ENFP over ENFJ.

PS: Im not that used to enneagram, cant help much. I just use enneagram to aid MBTI, it has been a MBTI auxiliary. Type 7 is the most common one for ENFP. ENFJs are usually type 2.

 

[OptoGypsy]

I graduated in engineering.
There should be a few ENFP/INFP in sciences too.
I had to force a decision between humanities and science like chemistry and math. I did like geography, study countries, etc...
But I dont like languages and I struggle memorizing stuff, I wish I had a better memory.

ENFP borderline T/F isnt that unusual. I measure stats, ENFP borderline E/I or T/F is not that uncommon.
What it is uncommon is ENFP with high conscinetiousness.

I want to see [MENTION=34313]RadicalDoubt[/MENTION] opinions, but, I think you are ENFP but unsure.
I have some reasons to guess ENFP over ENFJ.

PS: Im not that used to enneagram, cant help much. I just use enneagram to aid MBTI, it has been a MBTI auxiliary. Type 7 is the most common one for ENFP. ENFJs are usually type 2.

I took the truity big 5 test and got the results of: 87.5% on openness 62.5% on conscientiousness 56% extroversion 48% agreeableness and 52% neurotic, I hope this helps.

 

[OptoGypsy]

I have friends who score as NTs and are spiritual, what differentiates an NF from a religious NT? I never thought about my values until my therapist had me choose 6 out of what was like 100 to help me discover myself and help build a foundation. My therapist is an infp. The thing is that anyone who has a relationship with a deity in my case being Christ and had a life changing moment that completely changed the way they think about life and their values from the physical such as fame, wealth, power would put it in when introducing themselves. You can't put it in the confines of everyone but need to narrow it down to an individual variable in a specific set mine being born again to gain a better understanding. As I understand most of the people here live with the mindset of unbelief, yet an NF can be seen in that system as the sjw or other idealogues that dwells in ideology and emotional response although there are those that also don't discover what they believe until later in life while having core ideas or symbols as to how they should behave and look at the world through, having traits such as being whimsical and living with the feelinf of magic in their consciousness. With that being said faith comes difficult for me but seeing as that I've changed and can see Gods Providence in my life a world without God seems implausible, a world of nihilism and pessimism, which is the worldview of my average atheistic character alongside with imagination and the need to go against the status quo. With that being said nihilism doesn't seem so bad especially looking at it through the lens of nier autamata.

 

[RadicalDoubt]

I want to see [MENTION=34313]RadicalDoubt[/MENTION] opinions, but, I think you are ENFP but unsure.
I have some reasons to guess ENFP over ENFJ.

I'd have to agree here, I'm leaning towards ENFP as well, it seems like a good fit. You're very clearly an intuitive, I think that Fi would be likely to come secondary if we are following the stacking theory (ie. there is a specific focus on being authentic and true to the self, as well as staying true to your beliefs and ideals. Ne vs Ni was sort of hard, but there seems to be more of a focus on the abstract and the original/novel rather than a vision (not to say that you are not an idealist).

I have friends who score as NTs and are spiritual, what differentiates an NF from a religious NT?

Any type can be spiritual honestly, even I am "spiritual" in my own way (though not in a religious way, more philosophically in my case). Spirituality certainly doesn't make one F rather than T. The biggest difference between F and T is values vs structure in this case and where the focus in that spirituality actually goes to. You are clearly very theoretical and abstract, and likely a deep thinking, but the way you have structured the majority of your descriptions is by focusing on the abstract, and the secondarily focusing on value structures and judgement, how you are moved by the value structures, beliefs and such. You focused on philosophy and what you believe in rather then the philosophy of how you think and why you think, which is why I say F over T (outside of you being more Fi than Fe).

Enneagram wise, I think I could help? I think your tritype at the very least is close.

1) What do you fear more, being constrained or deprived or being unloved and unnecessary? What makes that distinction?

2) Describe your relationship with the following:
a) Anger

b) Shame

c) Fear

d) Love/passion

e) Conflict

 

[OptoGypsy]

I'd have to agree here, I'm leaning towards ENFP as well, it seems like a good fit. You're very clearly an intuitive, I think that Fi would be likely to come secondary if we are following the stacking theory (ie. there is a specific focus on being authentic and true to the self, as well as staying true to your beliefs and ideals. Ne vs Ni was sort of hard, but there seems to be more of a focus on the abstract and the original/novel rather than a vision (not to say that you are not an idealist). Any type can be spiritual honestly, even I am "spiritual" in my own way (though not in a religious way, more philosophically in my case). Spirituality certainly doesn't make one F rather than T. The biggest difference between F and T is values vs structure in this case and where the focus in that spirituality actually goes to. You are clearly very theoretical and abstract, and likely a deep thinking, but the way you have structured the majority of your descriptions is by focusing on the abstract, and the secondarily focusing on value structures and judgement, how you are moved by the value structures, beliefs and such. You focused on philosophy and what you believe in rather then the philosophy of how you think and why you think, which is why I say F over T (outside of you being more Fi than Fe). Enneagram wise, I think I could help? I think your tritype at the very least is close. 1) What do you fear more, being constrained or deprived or being unloved and unnecessary? What makes that distinction? 2) Describe your relationship with the following: a) Anger b) Shame c) Fear d) Love/passion e) Conflict

Haha, no wonder why she has me focusing on values, it's because it's my strong suit. 1. I fear more the inability to be able to cope with life independently and not being able to support myself. I fear being unloved. As much as I'd love to be a freedom seeker I did stop taking psychedelics in order to give my parents peace. I want others to be happy and not to worry while in the same time making decisions based on my own choices.
Anger: I feel angry whenever I feel as if someone is treating me or someone else unjustly.
Shame: I feel shame from stuff like job status and not being original at all times although I'm learning to be thankful for everything.
Fear: I'm afraid of stuff I've been indoctrinated with such as hell. It doesn't keep me up at nights, I also fear rejection.
Love/passion: I'm passionate about knowledge and love to share the knowledge I've gained, my love language is quality time.
Conflict: I mock which I got from my dad, I do my best to stay calm.

I guess the thing I don't understand is the word idealist, ideologies seem to be things like post modernism, Marxism, romanticism, scientism, spiritsm, capitalism, I don't really care or fall under an ism.

Here are some poems that describe my values in a way that the sheet my therapist may have not:
First is a satire on Knowledge: Philosophical inquiry is looking for the vanishing black cat in the back alleyway under the night sky while the heavens wink at you. It is caressing the spirits under the moonlight trance as the scientist bathes under the waterfall seeking out rays of light from the light above. The pondering of the past, present and future as the magician stumbles into the trance of timelessness. It is reaching out to the paradise of Eden as you hold the galaxies upon your palm like a teardrop from heaven. It is the creativity in the creation of the tower of Babel and in the destruction of Athens. It is biting from the tree of good and evil in search of knowledge from the spirits. I have eaten from the tree of good and evil.

A Description of a shallow person: I am the slain waxen doll. The shadow of a nightingale trying to escape its empty vessel. All I wanted was to prove to myself that I am more than a walking manikin existing in the dollhouse of a three-year-old, and all I could accomplish was to consume the Leviathans pale fire. The marble is not glistening under the sun as the anonymous hand scribbles in the dark.
I swallowed up the bronze dragon as I watched the cherubs dance to Bach. I danced with the harlot witch to obtain pixie dust, to explore the nether regions of hell. I am the beetle at the wrong end of a crazed air head’s high heel. The eyes of my spirit roll so far back that blood is pouring from my eye sockets as I stare into the infinite gallows of the hanged man.
I want to pull the trigger on this manikin’s temple and watch its fluff fly into the vacuum. I am going crazy under the grimacing grin of the Cheshire Cat. The pale fire is my crib between the two abysses. The heart is a useless commodity, I hear that it tastes great with tea. You the reader by now probably consider me a wretched charlatan, a pathetic Gogolian creature.

Facing Fear: The serpent’s eyes travel through the depths of death.
Life is nonexistent within this night,
I think and wonder on the edge of the knife, who am I, what great deeds have I done for the light to have visited me.
The angel spoke of birth as I tended my father’s gardens.
Was it truly an angel or just my imagination?
Do I hunger to be loved, for who am I for God to have chosen me?
I am nothing more than a loyal servant in my father’s home, the voice I heard today was the same as the royal light that possessed Balaam’s loyal stead on that faithless day.
Am I not to have faith as Sarah did when she mocked Gods promise, no I can’t, I will not… What will Joseph think when I tell him that I will give birth without being with a man,
yet a warm radiance warms my heart as I look upon tomorrow…
I hope and plead that Joseph doesn’t think that I have been unfaithful.
That this is all a lie, if he does lord please send me to Sheol tonight.
Allow me to look into the eyes of the bronze snake for I am withering not like the fake prophet but like the crops in the month of death.
What would Ruth have said if she stood amidst the crops of my heart tonight?
What a knavish notion, what a commotion the heart creates when afraid of the laughter of Azazel.
Lord please help Joseph understand – help him understand that I am loyal…
I am your loyal servant and stand among those is Sheol tonight under this moonlight trance, lord you are my all – thy will be done.

A rebuttal to Nietzsche: The flame of reason tells me that time is a circle,
the dwelling place of the firebird,
where out of the ashes comes paradise in a circular fashion,
it's nothing more than an illusion,
as we look at the circle in the light of faith,
we come to see that it is a spiral,
the stairway to heaven,
where the fire ceases to exist and is sublimated into the eternal radiant light,
the flame transfigures into a richer, fuller absolute,
time itself cannot contain it,
it transcends into Eros, the groom and his bride,
but i am stuck in the third dimensional,
the resting place where the high and mighty have fallen,
the martyrs and the free thinkers,
but as I gaze out of the cemetery, and escape my thought,
I see the crosses on top of the gravestones,
and the star of David leaves me a path to the Christ,
to the words of the gospel,
to the path of New Jerusalem.

An ode to Dostoevsky: I will seek my being outside of myself,
what does my soul hunger for,
will my quench be satisfied in self,
no as it was the ruin of Raskolnikov,
will it be found in the universe,
what is it if not an accident but in chaos came the cosmos came the all universal, cosmopolitan idea of consciousness of both the garden and the serpent,
the fall and the resurrection but my soul does not cease,
it still thirsts,
where does curiosity come from?
Is it an illusion or symbolic?
What it transcends is the consciousness and becomes spirit,
reaching out to the heavenly,
the revolutionary divine spark of logos,
the divine spark of the infinite,
thus is where God is and the crux of my wanting as I am ever reaching out for bliss,
the soft whisper comes ever closer reminding me of the transfiguration,
the living body,
let me arise from the ashes and become united with the whisper of genius as the dove guides my way to eternity, (eternity being timelessness)
there lays freedom, peace and joy,
the escape of the tyrannical reflex of individualism,
I am an ever hungry exile of Eden,
bathing in the springs of living water,
where angels and demons struggle for my heart,
this is finite and it is a part of the infinite,
a reflection of the eternal.