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  1. #1
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    Default ESTPS, How Do You Deal With Anger?

    I want to compare how I, a ESTP, compare to others of my type when dealing with anger.
    I am a person constantly dealing with negative emotions. My anger is probably my strongest emotion, I always get ticked off. I often feel envy and jealousy and sometimes hatred towards others for being better than me or having something I don't, whether its physical or mental. I don't try to turn these emotions off. In fact, I go towards them. I like the way anger makes me feel, strong and independent. As for the way I handle it, I'm explosive when it comes to things like sports, competition, video games, etc. But when it comes to people,especially the ones that I'm close to or is family, I hold it in and withdraw. I don't talk as I know if I do I'll let the anger be heard in my voice and fake my feelings to avoid awkwardness or conflict. I hate to fight with friends or family, especially ones I look up to. I wish I didn't care like I do in other moments but I cant bring myself to unless I reach a boiling point. I hold grudges though and don't easily forget things done to me.
    An example is just yesterday. I've been trying to learn how to do flips so I could take my parkour to the next level but find myself scared to attempt any kind of stunt. But yesterday my brother, an ISFP, was able to do a front flip off of playground equipment on his first try with no practice ever done at all. It pissed me off how this kid, who sits inside all day doing nothing but playing games or watching youtube, is able to be so flexible and do things I've been practicing. I withdrew and avoided him and said whatever or straight up ignored him when he tried to show me again to get my approval, and my positive attitude changed for the whole day. My mom noticed this and gave me a mouthful but I don't care, I still feel envy towards him.
    So tell me, how do you guys deal with anger?
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  2. #2
    Senior Member notmyapples's Avatar
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    Default

    This sounds like tertiary Fe, I see it quite common in young ESTPs who haven't developed their lower functions. I'm not ESTP, but I was raised by an ESTP father along with an ISTP brother. I notice that their anger can be very explosive and it is the most prominent negative emotion they will express. The ESTP has a better handle on it, presumably due to age, and the most he will do is raise his voice, viciously cuss or bang on drawers. He tends to think he is hiding his emotions but it's always quite obvious. Fe is typically more clear to the eye than Fi, behavioral changes are easy to spot even before he blows his top.
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  3. #3

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    I usually go for a run, otherwise I smoke cigarettes and think it all out. I once wrote a novella while I was angry, full of violence and cynicism. I can also let out anger by playing piano or guitar and singing.
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  4. #4
    A Bittersweet Symphony... Eryn Silverfrond's Avatar
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    Sparring is good. The trick for me has been trying to find a constructive focus and channel for it, because if I'm careful, it's explodes out without purpose or direction, and even though I'm good at keeping it in check around my loved ones or friends, it does, eventually errode its way out, I finde working out helps, and creating art, but I always end up needing to blow off steam physically somehow eventually. I just try to turn it to good ends.
    With all due respect,
    Eryn Silverfrond;
    of the Gentleman Jacks.


    We're all Faery Tales; after a fashion,
    Our stories unfolding around us...
    and through us...

    Our Sky Father and our Earth Mother are dancing.

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    The dreams of butterflies cocooned in the womb of becoming.


  5. #5

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    I know I did the stupidest things while angry including breaking my own hand punching a wall and having to get surgery haha.
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  6. #6
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    Still not sure of E/I, but I don't want to display negative emotions in general, especially in front of people, and I know I'll get over it quickly. So these things don't happen often. But I'll unintentionally handle objects/doors/whatever aggressively, and as a kid I used to break things. A few months ago I had to pull over while driving to shout swear words (not from road rage, I don't have that problem lol). I like that sparring was mentioned. I did martial arts for a while and I can't pay for lessons right now, but when I go back to university soon I'll take classes there. It's nice to have an excuse to kick the shit out of something.
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  7. #7
    7w8 3w4 1w2 I, Tonya's Avatar
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    Interesting.
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