[ESFP] Lack of spontaneous friends for an ESFP

[shanix]

Do any other ESFPs have this problem? A lack of spontaneous friends to hang out with.
Reasons
-even though i'm a teenager, my friends are all extremely driven in their homework/after school activities. I like fun activities in my spare time( beach, pools, water parks, malls etc). They always hesitate to indulge in such 'hedonistic' things

- i have less friends than i would like, because i don't really go to church/after school activities

-only child

The question is, what types are best for spontaneous friends that can go anywhere with you?

 

[Gawain]

If you'll excuse the response from an INFP, I actually understand completely where you're coming from. (I'm near the border on both E/I and N/S, so ESFP isn't as much of a stretch for me as you might think.)

I had the same problem as a teenager. I too was an only child, and my mom was the overprotective sort that insisted I only have hobbies she was willing to hang around. My method of dealing with that was as many after school activities as I could get away with. Scouting is a really good one, 'cause whatever random stuff you come up with, you can usually find some random badge to tie it to. Works like a charm getting those overachiever types to join you in something fun for once. And theater, 'cause anything could be research "for a role" or "improv training". But I'm getting off-topic.

Another ESFP is your best bet (most of my best friends are ESFPs) but just about any P will be more spontaneous than a J most of the time. Other E-types will be more likely than introverts to join you if the activity is loud or in a really crowded place. (Not always though. Sometime introverts are really excited to join if it's just a few hours.) The N/S or F/T has more to do with communication style than anything else, so it's not important in spontaneous adventures. For instance, I have INTP and ISFP friends that are both just as sponateous and fun as my ESFP friends. Only difference is that we're less likely to go to a club if it's just the introverts because none of us really like loud music. Video game arcades, trampolining, theme parks, or other randomness is all totally normal though. Also, J-types may not be spontaneous, but they still do fun things sometimes. You just gotta figure out how to invite the right people at the right time. A little tricky, but so is finding all the folks you get along with best.

Hope that helps! Being a teenager sucks no matter which type you are. But I hope things get better for you soon.

 

[Cellmold]

Come live where I am, there appears to be an abundance of spontaneity. Usually the spontaneous decision to steal and/or attack people drunkenly, but still there is a lot of spontain going on.

 

[TSDesigner]

How about you go to the places you think are fun and then make friends with people who are already there.