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[ISTP] The Mating Ritual of the ISTP

Lamia

New member
Joined
Feb 19, 2015
Messages
3
MBTI Type
INTP
As an INTP girl interested in an ISTP guy, I am in need of some help, especially in dissecting and analyzing this unusual ritual that I must partake in in order to further study this fascinating creature. He outwitted me so suffice to say I am hooked but confused as to how to go about it.

What signs or indication do you guys give to show that you are at least interested in someone new? Especially someone who is not a Feeler?

My situation: -

I have laid out some bait; knowing that the Se is strong with this type of unusual animal, I have lightly dusted my traps with promises of fishing, hiking or off-roading. None of the baits were taken. Like the fruitless Wile E. Coyote I went back to the drawing board.

He is the brother of a newish friend and thus I have little access and time to study his habits and temperament, with brief glimpses allowed whenever I came over (5x now). His brother has noted that the usually quiet and skittish ISTP had actually come out of his cave and graced us with his presence for longer than he usually does. While ISTP is usually quiet and leaves within an hour or so, he has stayed for hours on end with us when I'm around, all the while the both of us talked endlessly while two other friends idled away on their phones.

Still, the creature is skittish despite his masculine demeanor and confidence. While he talks his eyes are glued to mine, or look to me when he wishes to confirm a statement or joke - but when idle he looks anywhere but at me. No sneaky darting looks. No long quiet gazes that is common in this breed of MBTI.

He has not asked for my number nor will he while his brother is around. I have not asked for his, nor will I when I have no practical reason to (since he didn't take the bait for outings.) I am at a loss. Advise me and quickly, for the jungle is dark and his eyes draw me in.
 
Last edited:

ChocolateMoose123

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Oct 4, 2008
Messages
5,278
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sx/sp
next time you're chatting with him get his number. Like, a friend has tickets to such and such and might have an extra one. If he expresses interest then just say, lemme get your number and I'll text you when I know for sure the info.

Or whatever. But you just have to bite the bullet and do something to open up lines of communication on your terms rather than by chance meetings.
 

Dannik

New member
Joined
Dec 6, 2013
Messages
141
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
9
How do you know he is an ISTP?


as an ISTP guy, my standard-operating-procedure is to be sweet and quiet and look longingly and ineffectually, and wait for her to make ALL THE MOVES.
 

Poki

New member
Joined
Dec 4, 2008
Messages
10,436
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STP
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
How do you know he is an ISTP?


as an ISTP guy, my standard-operating-procedure is to be sweet and quiet and look longingly and ineffectually, and wait for her to make ALL THE MOVES.

I kinda relate, but not completely. I am not forceful which requires the other person to have to initiate. I don't know if its istp, but unless I know I am wanted I will disappear. Doesn't hurt my feelings or anything. But I do require a good amount of initiation at first. If I respond and don't disappear its a good thing. If I disappear I am distancing myself. That may just be me though. I don't do good at chasing someone, I will walk off. If you don't follow then there will be a distance and never get close.

Quick and easy way that works with me is physical closeness. Sit on my lap, touch, etc. Doesn't have to be sexual, but it shifts me into a different mindset.
 

great_bay

New member
Joined
Jan 29, 2015
Messages
987
MBTI Type
intp
Enneagram
541
It depends on the individual. My ISTP relative is upbeat and is kinda of a party boy. He would flirt by acting silly. My other ISTP relative is incredibly quiet as a mouse and wouldn't flirt the same way.
 

Lamia

New member
Joined
Feb 19, 2015
Messages
3
MBTI Type
INTP
My apologies for getting back to you guys so late. I had to travel then got busy with a project for work (that I am still working on but hey, we all need breaks!) Thanks for the replies so far, they are a great help!

next time you're chatting with him get his number. Like, a friend has tickets to such and such and might have an extra one. If he expresses interest then just say, lemme get your number and I'll text you when I know for sure the info.

Or whatever. But you just have to bite the bullet and do something to open up lines of communication on your terms rather than by chance meetings.

I did get his number from a friend since he knows a few things that would help out with my current project.

I texted him and asked him for help, he told me he was busy this weekend but if its cool he should be free next weekend. I told him the info I needed. He said he'd check when he can and that it was no problem, consider it his duty.

When I didn't get the info (I needed it before the weekend but I neglected to mention that) I texted him again the next day and asked. He told me he forgot then messaged me the info. I thanked him with a joke, he said no prob and...that's it. Radio silence since then. Fair enough he said he would be busy but I have this niggling feeling he won't remember next weekend either if he didn't remember the info before. In which case you'd see that as disinterest, correct?


I kinda relate, but not completely. I am not forceful which requires the other person to have to initiate. I don't know if its istp, but unless I know I am wanted I will disappear. Doesn't hurt my feelings or anything. But I do require a good amount of initiation at first. If I respond and don't disappear its a good thing. If I disappear I am distancing myself. That may just be me though. I don't do good at chasing someone, I will walk off. If you don't follow then there will be a distance and never get close.

Quick and easy way that works with me is physical closeness. Sit on my lap, touch, etc. Doesn't have to be sexual, but it shifts me into a different mindset.

Hmm, I haven't touched him much, just when passing things. I only see him when he is around his brother so that kind of puts a damper on things. His brother did mention that ISTP is shy when it comes to girls (though he seems pretty confident to me) and rarely initiates; but then again I doubt the brothers actually talk about relationships much. ISTP has had female friends as well as exes so I know he isn't girl shy in general. They asked him about me and he said he was interested in getting to know me.

I will try to ramp up the touching a bit more but as an introvert I also have a bit of a boundaries/touch issue. Hell I am surprised I am initiating this much myself.

If you forget a favor to a girl it means your interest is passive though, correct?

- - - Updated - - -

It depends on the individual. My ISTP relative is upbeat and is kinda of a party boy. He would flirt by acting silly. My other ISTP relative is incredibly quiet as a mouse and wouldn't flirt the same way.

How would the quiet guy flirt? Or not flirt at all?
 

Lamia

New member
Joined
Feb 19, 2015
Messages
3
MBTI Type
INTP
How do you know he is an ISTP?


as an ISTP guy, my standard-operating-procedure is to be sweet and quiet and look longingly and ineffectually, and wait for her to make ALL THE MOVES.

Why I made him take the test of course! Easy and straight forward. He thought it didn't fit at first but when I further asked him questions at a later date, well it confirmed my theory.

So your mating ritual is to play dead until she comes sniffing over? If she had your number and messaged you for a practical purpose, would you take it as a hint to keep talking to her after the purpose is done?
 

great_bay

New member
Joined
Jan 29, 2015
Messages
987
MBTI Type
intp
Enneagram
541
My apologies for getting back to you guys so late. I had to travel then got busy with a project for work (that I am still working on but hey, we all need breaks!) Thanks for the replies so far, they are a great help!



I did get his number from a friend since he knows a few things that would help out with my current project.

I texted him and asked him for help, he told me he was busy this weekend but if its cool he should be free next weekend. I told him the info I needed. He said he'd check when he can and that it was no problem, consider it his duty.

When I didn't get the info (I needed it before the weekend but I neglected to mention that) I texted him again the next day and asked. He told me he forgot then messaged me the info. I thanked him with a joke, he said no prob and...that's it. Radio silence since then. Fair enough he said he would be busy but I have this niggling feeling he won't remember next weekend either if he didn't remember the info before. In which case you'd see that as disinterest, correct?




Hmm, I haven't touched him much, just when passing things. I only see him when he is around his brother so that kind of puts a damper on things. His brother did mention that ISTP is shy when it comes to girls (though he seems pretty confident to me) and rarely initiates; but then again I doubt the brothers actually talk about relationships much. ISTP has had female friends as well as exes so I know he isn't girl shy in general. They asked him about me and he said he was interested in getting to know me.

I will try to ramp up the touching a bit more but as an introvert I also have a bit of a boundaries/touch issue. Hell I am surprised I am initiating this much myself.

If you forget a favor to a girl it means your interest is passive though, correct?

- - - Updated - - -



How would the quiet guy flirt? Or not flirt at all?

My ISTP relative wouldn't flirt. He's quiet.
 

ChocolateMoose123

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Oct 4, 2008
Messages
5,278
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sx/sp
Fair enough he said he would be busy but I have this niggling feeling he won't remember next weekend either if he didn't remember the info before. In which case you'd see that as disinterest, correct?

Not necessarily. More like he gave you what you asked for. i wouldn't waste time reading into small things like that because even our closest friends can think or feel like we aren't giving them enough attention. It happens to me all the time. Weeks can go by without us talking and for me it doesn't denote a lack of affection AT ALL!

To them, they can get hurt pretty easily, I guess? I dunno. All I know is when I do talk to them I get the "you never call" sort of deal before having to "yeah, I know" them to death and then we resume convo like normal.

I mean, these are people I really like and are familiar with.
So, if you're interested just call him up and ask him out. Skip the long, slow hinting process. It'll wear you down before us. Lol
 

Dannik

New member
Joined
Dec 6, 2013
Messages
141
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
9
So your mating ritual is to play dead until she comes sniffing over?

Not intentionally. It is more that I am obtuse to flirtation, oblivious to most signals.

If she had your number and messaged you for a practical purpose, would you take it as a hint to keep talking to her after the purpose is done?

No, I would assume the practical purpose was the only reason for coming over.


I find that physical touch is the best indicator of romantic or sexual interest,
I generally do not realize anyone is interested in me until they start to make intentional physical contact.
 

SpreeFirit

New member
Joined
Apr 26, 2013
Messages
6
MBTI Type
ENFJ
From my experience, they are slow to commit. Very very slow to commit, and subtle in their advances. Just wait it out, keep being your most natural self, and he will come to you. When he has decided you are worth it.
 

iHeartCats

New member
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
213
MBTI Type
ESFP
Enneagram
no
I am in need of some help, especially in dissecting and analyzing this unusual ritual that I must partake in in order to further study this fascinating creature. He outwitted me so suffice to say I am hooked but confused as to how to go about it.

My situation: -

I have laid out some bait; knowing that the Se is strong with this type of unusual animal, I have lightly dusted my traps with promises of fishing, hiking or off-roading. None of the baits were taken. Like the fruitless Wile E. Coyote I went back to the drawing board.

He is the brother of a newish friend and thus I have little access and time to study his habits and temperament, with brief glimpses allowed whenever I came over (5x now). His brother has noted that the usually quiet and skittish ISTP had actually come out of his cave and graced us with his presence for longer than he usually does. While ISTP is usually quiet and leaves within an hour or so, he has stayed for hours on end with us when I'm around, all the while the both of us talked endlessly while two other friends idled away on their phones.

Still, the creature is skittish despite his masculine demeanor and confidence. While he talks his eyes are glued to mine, or look to me when he wishes to confirm a statement or joke - but when idle he looks anywhere but at me. No sneaky darting looks. No long quiet gazes that is common in this breed of MBTI.

He has not asked for my number nor will he while his brother is around. I have not asked for his, nor will I when I have no practical reason to (since he didn't take the bait for outings.) I am at a loss. Advise me and quickly, for the jungle is dark and his eyes draw me in.

What signs or indication do you guys give to show that you are at least interested in someone new? Especially someone who is not a Feeler?

I don't have the answer to your question.....but girl, I'm a fan of you.

cn4acg9p3d7giqju581w.gif
 

Riva

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 26, 2014
Messages
2,371
Enneagram
7w8
'His eyes glued to mine'

Seems like he is interested. ISTPs don't usually embrace their lets-get-shit-done or go-get-her side until they hit their 20s or mid 20s. Besides they are introverted.

I am really glad you have initiated things. This is rare from girls. They just usually only giggle at your jokes if they are interested in you - and probably stalk you a bit -.

Anyway, yeah take another step and get his number or start chatting with him online.
 

Doctor Cringelord

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 27, 2013
Messages
20,567
MBTI Type
I
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I think the ISTP's style of romancing is dependent on their enneatype rather than their cognitive functions (as with any MBTI type)
 

Poki

New member
Joined
Dec 4, 2008
Messages
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sx/so
Freak me, baby (Ah, yeah)
Freak me, baby (Mmm, just like that)
Freak me, baby (Ah, yeah)
Freak me, baby

Let me lick you up and down till you say stop
Let me play with your body, baby, make you real hot
Let me do all the things you want me to do
'Cause tonight, baby, I wanna get freaky with you

Baby, don't you understand
I wanna be your nasty man
I wanna make your body scream
And you will know just what I mean (You know what I mean)

24 carat gold
To warm the nights when you get cold
I wanna lick you up and down (Baby, yeah, bay, yeah)
And then I wanna lay you down, come on Silk sing

Let me lick you up and down till you say stop (Lick you up and down)
Let me play with your body, baby, make you real hot (Let me make you real hot)
Let me do all the things you want me to do (Whoa, ho, oh)
'Cause tonight, baby, I wanna get freaky with you

I love the taste of whip cream (Hey)
Spread it on, don't be mean (Baby, don't be mean)
You know I can't resist you, girl
I'll fly you all around the world (All around the world, oh, baby)

I wanna see your body drip
Come on let me take a sip (Come on, come on, come on, come on)
Take off what you cherish most (come on, come on, come on, come on, baby)
'Cause when I brag I like to brag and boast

Let me lick you up and down till you say stop (Lick you up and down, oh, baby)
Let me play with your body, baby, make you real hot
(I wanna play with your body, baby, I wanna play with your body, girl)
Let me do all the things you want me to do
'Cause tonight, baby, I wanna get freaky with you

You, you, you, you (Oh, you)
You, you, you, you (Let me freak you)
You, you, you, you (All of you)
Yeah, come on, come on

You, you, you, you (Oh...you)
You, you, you, you (Let me do you)
'Cause tonight, baby, I wanna get freaky with you

Let me lick you up and down till you say stop (Freak me, baby)
Let me play with your body, baby, make you real hot (Freak me, baby)
Let me do all the things you want me to do (Freak me, baby)
'Cause tonight, baby, I wanna get freaky with you

(Baby, don't stop) Let me lick you up and down till you say stop (Baby, don't stop)
Let me play (Baby, don't stop) with your body, baby, make you real hot (Hey...)
Let me do (Baby, don't stop) all the things you want me to do (Baby, don't stop)
'Cause tonight, baby, I wanna get freaky, freaky

(Let me lick you up and down) Let me lick you up and down till you say stop
Let me play with your body, baby (Up and down), make you real hot
(Let me make you soakin' wet, baby)
Let me do all the things (Oh...) you want me to do
(I won't play around with your love, baby)
'Cause tonight, baby, I wanna get freaky with you



Lol :)
 

Poki

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Dec 4, 2008
Messages
10,436
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STP
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sx/so
Ha ha
Wait for it wait for it
Let me tell you what I'mma do right quick
(Whatchu gon’ do)
Listen
Imma start from the
Forehead to lips to the neck to the chest
Flip her over then I’m kissin’ down her backside
Flip her over again I’m ready to go for a swim
Imma make her body tremble if she act right
Make her as woozy as woozy get
Feelin’ like we on a movie set
Can you feel the vibrations?
My tongue just like a Jacuzzi jet
I put your man to shame wit it
I don’t play no games wit it
Imma have you grippin’ the seats screamin’
When I write your name wit it
First last middle
And my tongue just likes to scribble
Morning, noon, and night
I gotta have it
I’m a dog eat it up like bits and kibbles
Make me dribble like cp3
But I rep that DTP
So if you gimme that
I’ma give you that
One leg up over my shoulder
Let me be your remote controller
Let me try to keep my composure
So many different ways that I can fold ya
Oh yea I go to town Girl
You should keep me around (oohhh)
Cause every night I’m goin’

[Hook:]
I’m going down down down (baby)
And do it ‘til your legs’ shakin’
Do it ‘til your legs’ shakin’
Do it ‘til your leg
(Oh)
I’m going down down down
And do it ‘til your legs’ shakin’ (Oh baby ya)
Do it ‘til your legs’ shakin’
Do it ‘til your leg
Then I’m gonna make her shake…
(Uh yea)
I’m gonna make you shake girl
(Your legs’ shakin’ baby)
(All night)
Open up and shake it baby
Shakin’ Girl



:)
 

Luigi

New member
Joined
Sep 10, 2015
Messages
1,310
MBTI Type
ISFJ
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
What signs or indication do you guys give to show that you are at least interested in someone new? Especially someone who is not a Feeler?

Well, maybe I'm different from a lot of ISTPs, but I'll just tell you as soon as I have my ducks in a row to commit. I need a job, license, car, and a decent amount of money before I'll tell you. If I start dating, I'm in it for keeps.
 
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