[ISFP] why is ISFP sensitive and conflict avoidant?

[Devil Flamingo]

If you look up that shit on Google you get lots of hits saying it's so.

Well, I'm quite certain I'm ISFP (I can't be ESFP because I don't think Se is my primary function, and I sure as hale does not use Te as my tertiary) and I say:

What is the reasoning behind these profiles stating this? Are those traits key in ISFP personalities? (meaning, if you're not those things you're not ISFP)

I suppose explaining what they mean and how I'm not those things would be useful.


* sense & sensitivititties:

Well, I'm sensitive to my environment, definitely. I hate crowded noisy filthy places like Toronto and NYC. I need to have lots of trees around me or I get depressed. I also miss the sea a lot when I'm away from it. And ofc I hate seeing ugly scheisse like garbage on the ground. I also have low tolerance for environments which contain large amount of lifeforms that engage in erratic behaviour such as drinking, shouting and overtly sexual PDAs.

Sensitive to people? Uh, no. Thanks to Fi (precioussss <3 <3) I don't put a lot of stock on what people think or say about me. If it's positive, tyvm for your thoughts. If it's negative, I'm not here for that. Why? Because I'm too much in my own world to honestly spend a lot of time thinking about what you think about me. I know what I think about me and I like it, you don't like how I roll, gtfo my forest. I'm not going to change myself for anyone, but I'm also not going to expect people to like me because, simply put, the people that like me matter, and the people that don't like me don't matter.

* conflict avoidance:

Well, ofc I'm a flower child / treehugger / druid / fairy but that doesn't mean I'm made of cotton candy and flower petals. Think thistle and weeds, or mistletoe and other such hater-bitch plants. I'm not at all averse to conflict; if anything I dislike people who are a little too conflict-avoidant for my taste because it bugs me when they'd rather stay out of trouble than put someone in their place. I mean, I prefer faux-conflict or play-fighting than actual arguments, but if someone's got beef with me I'm quite willing to verbally cockfight them. I'm not a tough guy by any means, but I'm not afraid of taking someone to the left if they're being a nuisance:

So yeah, IDFK man. I'm not sensitive and I'm not conflict-avoidant (and I know it's not just my perception because I asked all my happy tree friends in the forest and they confirmed this). Sure, I almost never pick a fight unless I'm just being my usual mischievous self (i.e. playing pranks on people) but if you look for me, you'll find me. :hi: Actually, I'm a lot like Radagast from The Hobbit - I would definitely turn tails the minute I run into The Necromancer because I know that's well outside my abilities, but if it's something I know I can handle (like him distracting the Orcs because they can't outrun his bunny sled) then I'm okay with that. :]

 

[chatoyer]

Sure you're not an NF?, you've got a lot of Ne going on in that post!

 

[Devil Flamingo]

Hmm, how though?

I mistyped as INFP/ENFP when I was younger (late adolescence) and didn't know diddly squat about the functions, but nowadays I don't think I could be NF even if I wanted to, lol. As far as functions go, I struggle to understand Ne when I read descriptions of it, but Se makes perfect sense to me. I have taken all sorts of tests and always seem to score high in Fi and Se and even Ni, but I don't recall anything about Ne, heh? Anyways, my friends seem to think Ne is totally wrong for me, so I dunno, I'll re-visit it just to be sure, but I'm not sure how I can exhibit a function I don't really understand...?

 

[WALMART]

Probably the longest post on this site I've ever read. Good work.


Will edit later with more.

 

[The Great One]

The ISFP is sensitive and conflict avoidant because they are feeling doms, and they are thinking function last. In addition, you will often see many ENFP's for example who are very aggressive, and who are constantly defending their Fi values with force. What allows them to do this is a strong 3rd function of Te. However, since ISFP's hardest function to tap into is Te, it makes them very docile little lambs.

 

[Jeffster]

If some traits in a type description don't fit you, more power to you, you're not a stereotype, you're an individual. If a ton of traits don't fit you, you're probably not that type. Pretty much that simple. Some people think SPs all get drunk, stoned, and like jumping out of airplanes. I've never done any of that, but guess what? Still an SP.

By the way, "Fi" does not mean you are inherently "too much in your own world" or don't care what anyone thinks of you.

It sounds to me like you are a bit sensitive, and care what people think about you, though. Otherwise you wouldn't care if a type description said you were.

 

[Jeffster]

And what does "take someone to the left" mean, anyway?

 

[Devil Flamingo]

@Jeffster:

I think the phrase is from celebrity sites such as ONTD? In her MV of the song "Irreplaceable" Beyoncé is kicking out her bf and she says "to the left, to the left, everything you own in a box to the left" (lol).

And nah, maybe we're working with different defs of what sensitivity is. To me sensitive means "easily hurt" (emotionally), which I'm not. I am often curious about little things such as these, but do not "care", at least not in the way that I understand caring. For example, someone once said to me "How can you be so abrasive??" and I honest to god don't/didn't value this person's view of me at all, but I was curious about her POV (since I don't think of myself as being such) and so I asked about it. I've never equated curiosity with caring; to me they are very different. I am curious about and care about my friends think of me; I am sometimes curious (but generally do not care) about what my acquaintances think of me. I dunno if that makes sense but to me it does.

Anyways, I do associate Fi with being in my own world and not putting a lot of stock on what others think me because the way I interpret it, introvert ethics says "your ethics = scheisse; mine are what matters" and "me >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> you" (not in a belittling sense, more like in a 'I find myself waaay more interesting than you or anyone else' sense).


@Great One:

OIC.


@Jon:

you call that long? you ain't seen nothing yet!

 

[The Great One]

If some traits in a type description don't fit you, more power to you, you're not a stereotype, you're an individual. If a ton of traits don't fit you, you're probably not that type. Pretty much that simple. Some people think SPs all get drunk, stoned, and like jumping out of airplanes. I've never done any of that, but guess what? Still an SP.

By the way, "Fi" does not mean you are inherently "too much in your own world" or don't care what anyone thinks of you.

It sounds to me like you are a bit sensitive, and care what people think about you, though. Otherwise you wouldn't care if a type description said you were.

I think it's mostly the Se doms that are known for that. Many of the ISTP's and ISFP's are not like that.

 

[highlander]

Hmm, how though?

I mistyped as INFP/ENFP when I was younger (late adolescence) and didn't know diddly squat about the functions, but nowadays I don't think I could be NF even if I wanted to, lol. As far as functions go, I struggle to understand Ne when I read descriptions of it, but Se makes perfect sense to me. I have taken all sorts of tests and always seem to score high in Fi and Se and even Ni, but I don't recall anything about Ne, heh? Anyways, my friends seem to think Ne is totally wrong for me, so I dunno, I'll re-visit it just to be sure, but I'm not sure how I can exhibit a function I don't really understand...?

I see Ne in your posts as well. You don't seem like an ISFP to me.

Of course, I'm just reading a few posts in one thread.

 

[Jeffster]

@Jeffster:

I think the phrase is from celebrity sites such as ONTD? In her MV of the song "Irreplaceable" Beyoncé is kicking out her bf and she says "to the left, to the left, everything you own in a box to the left" (lol).

I...see....yeah, the next "celebrity site" I go to will be the first, so I have no idea what "ONTD" is, though I think I may have heard the song you're talking about before.

Anyways, I do associate Fi with being in my own world and not putting a lot of stock on what others think me because the way I interpret it, introvert ethics says "your ethics = scheisse; mine are what matters" and "me >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> you" (not in a belittling sense, more like in a 'I find myself waaay more interesting than you or anyone else' sense).

Well, I think I partially agree with you here. I believe "Fi" could be described as a more individualistic value system, something which I think is magnified even more when paired with the SP temperament, which is made up of non-conformist people in general. However, by nature, SFPs are entertainers, and require a kind of feedback relationship, which does sorta need some "putting stock" in what others think. My observation is that it tends to be more about what others think of the SFP's creations or abilities or generous actions than on what people think of our ethics.

So, we may not really be disagreeing so much as just presenting things a bit differently.

I think it's mostly the Se doms that are known for that. Many of the ISTP's and ISFP's are not like that.

Known for what "that"? Since you quoted my whole post, I'm not sure if you meant known for sensitivity or for getting drunk, etc. If it's the latter, then I would say many of the ESTPs and ESFPs are not like that either.

 

[lunalum]

People think ISFP is sensitive and conflict avoidant as a rule often because they either think that they are all Enneagram 9s, or mistake some ISFJs for ISFPs (ISFJs tend to have more of that mellow edge to them, by having a double dose of being both Pi dom and Fe aux).


You sound very much like an actual typical ISFP to me.

 

[The Great One]

[MENTION=4358]Jeffster[/MENTION]

When I quoted you I was referring to the fact that most of the Se doms are party animals, not long term thinkers, and into doing wild and crazy things. This is especially true with the enneagram 7 Se doms.

 

[Jeffster]

[MENTION=4358]Jeffster[/MENTION]

When I quoted you I was referring to the fact that most of the Se doms are party animals, not long term thinkers, and into doing wild and crazy things. This is especially true with the enneagram 7 Se doms.

"wild and crazy" is very much in the eye of the beholder, though. There are many people who would look at my life and not see anything I do as wild and crazy, but others who might think it's always that way. So it's tough to make a "most" statement about something like that, or "party animals" for that matter.

 

[The Great One]

"wild and crazy" is very much in the eye of the beholder, though. There are many people who would look at my life and not see anything I do as wild and crazy, but others who might think it's always that way. So it's tough to make a "most" statement about something like that, or "party animals" for that matter.

I'm an Ne dom, and we usually speak in generalities.

 

[roastingmallows]

When I saw the title of this post, I thought "Oh gosh. Perhaps my sister ISN'T an ISFP after all." thinking you were going to go on about how sensitive ISFPs are...

My sister and I are always trying to decide if she is an ISFP or an ISFJ, and one of the reasons we have a hard time believing ISFP is because she just isn't passive or wishy washy like you might imagine an ISFP to be. I must say though, your post reminded me a lot of her.

 

[roastingmallows]

Well, I'm sensitive to my environment, definitely.

And ofc I hate seeing ugly scheisse like garbage on the ground. I also have low tolerance for environments which contain large amount of lifeforms that engage in erratic behaviour such as drinking, shouting and overtly sexual PDAs.

Sensitive to people? Uh, no. Thanks to Fi (precioussss <3 <3) I don't put a lot of stock on what people think or say about me. If it's positive, tyvm for your thoughts. If it's negative, I'm not here for that. Why? Because I'm too much in my own world to honestly spend a lot of time thinking about what you think about me. I know what I think about me and I like it, you don't like how I roll, gtfo my forest. I'm not going to change myself for anyone, but I'm also not going to expect people to like me because, simply put, the people that like me matter, and the people that don't like me don't matter.

I'm not at all averse to conflict; if anything I dislike people who are a little too conflict-avoidant for my taste because it bugs me when they'd rather stay out of trouble than put someone in their place. I mean, I prefer faux-conflict or play-fighting than actual arguments, but if someone's got beef with me I'm quite willing to verbally cockfight them. I'm not a tough guy by any means, but I'm not afraid of taking someone to the left if they're being a nuisance:

So yeah, IDFK man. I'm not sensitive and I'm not conflict-avoidant (and I know it's not just my perception because I asked all my happy tree friends in the forest and they confirmed this). Sure, I almost never pick a fight unless I'm just being my usual mischievous self (i.e. playing pranks on people) but if you look for me, you'll find me.

All of this sounds just like her. She really doesn't care what other people think of her too much, and while she doesn't exactly relish conflict (being a E9 as well), she is quite willing to and capable of sticking up for herself.

 

[Devil Flamingo]

yay, ESFP! love the astrology bits in the sig. :hi:

and lol @ me being ISFP. thanks to Chattoyer and Highlander , I've been re-visiting ENFP (my previous type, from maybe 1-2 years ago) and comparing notes with ISFP. Not sure which route to go yet, we'll see. IDFK (and don't remember) why I decided I wasn't NF after all, but I'm sure there was a reason somewhere...

anyways, thanks for the feedback y'all. :3

 

[Jeffster]

I'm an Ne dom, and we usually speak in generalities.

Well, that's kind of a cop-out.

 

[The Great One]

Well, that's kind of a cop-out.

Nah, you just don't understand Ne.